Today, after complaining all my life that no one makes a decent can opener, I have realised that I have been using them the wrong way. I finally figured out that the cutting blade goes on the SIDE of the can not the TOP. I'm 57 years old. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML
Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML
Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML
Classic
Today, I struggled to open a childproof bottle, which, by the way, had the instructions printed on the lid. FML.
Stop embarrassing me!
Today, I discovered I don’t even have the dexterity to screw the cap back onto a bottle of soda without dropping it. Not only that, but mother saw the need to point it out and laugh at me, so people around us in the store stared. FML
Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML
Sliced and diced
Today, I tried to demonstrate to my friend how laughably dull our kitchen knives are by swiping one across my palm. Turns out Dad noticed the problem yesterday and sharpened them. FML
Today, I spent 2 minutes struggling to cork a wine bottle for one of my tables only to have them eventually point out to me that the bottle was a twist-off. FML
Today, I realised a second too late why trying to hack a popcorn kernel out from between your teeth with a steak knife is really a bad idea. FML
The war on pickles
Today, I spent my lunch break trying to open a jar of pickles that had been stuck for weeks. I finally gave up and asked a coworker for help. He tapped the lid once with a spoon and it opened immediately. I'd been fighting a pickle jar every day for a month. FML
Top comments
ari330 21
It IS supposed to go on the top op
Callyn 47
There are two types of can opener, one which opens from the top and one which opens from the side. You must have only bought the side-opening style, even while using it wrong. They look very similar, but the blade angles are different. Opening from the top is much safer. You can toss the lid right away and not have any sharp angles to cut yourself on. Opening from the side leaves you with a lot of sharp parts to cut your wrist or finger.
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Comments (14)
zuckerburg 21
I was 5 when I figured it out. Let me guess, you had to see an article on "the facebook" that said "you've been doing this all wrong!" before you "realized" it. Right? Morons
Anastasiia Bogolepova 10
What? O_o
clair_brodie 35
It actually does not matter how you do it...
Schm17ty 1
lol, there’s two different kinds! One goes on the side, one goes on top. I haven’t mastered the top one yet.