Today, after being in the hospital for two days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex-girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
You what?
Today, I had a rare phone call from my ex-girlfriend. We ended up talking for hours about old times. It was the best conversation we have had in forever, it made me miss her and miss us. Later on in the day, she called back asking what we talked about. She was too high too remember. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend asked how long he'd have to wait until he could ask out my best friend. We broke up yesterday. FML
Backstabbing
Today, I was chilling with my best friend and suddenly I got a text from my ex saying he wanted me back. My best friend saw the text and said, "Don't go back with him, you deserve better." I wanted to go back with him but I didn't. Later, I saw them hanging out and turns out they're dating. FML
Today, my ex called me up to suggest that we become friends, only so that she could introduce me to her new boyfriend. FML
A bit of an overreaction
Today, I found out that the reason my ex-fiance didn't visit me in the hospital after my accident, which I dumped him for, was because the hospital wouldn't let him in because he wasn't family. He's blocked my number, returned the ring and everything. FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Small world, huh?
Today, I was talking to my best friend about how much of an asshole my ex-boyfriend is. After about 2 hours of non-stop bitching, it turns out she's actually dating him. FML
It was the painkillers, I swear
Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML
Birthday Girl
Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML
Top comments
Rayn4u_fml 0
At least he cared about your friendship enough to ask you, rather than going for it and you finding out in the worst possible way. Unfortunately he's put you in that awful position where you just have to say yes because otherwise you're the guy who "didn't want his friend to find happiness". Good luck!
marny_fml 0
omg, what an asshole.
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Comments (27)
Alley_Cat_fml 0
I got my tonsils taken out when I was 14 and ended up with Pneumonia, had to miss out on school for two weeks, when I got out my best-friend asked if I had a fun holiday, what did I get her and why didn't I call. I agree though, at least he asked and I hope you had great pleasure in telling him 'No ******* way'.
Whiz_boy 0
Wow... You'd better make sure that the ex he's referring to was already your ex when you were hospitalized...
Sexxi 0
Just to clear this up, if you broke up with her theres a three day waiting period if she broke up with you its a few months. but the guy probably shoulda waited until you were out of the hospital
Fields4mint 0
...At least he asked?
Dorchester 0
it sux about the hospital dude but @ least ur boy called u n asked if he could date her cuz ur not supposed 2 date ur friends exes according to my brotha. mayb thats true in dating when ur older. but yeah wudnt u hav felt worse if u got no calls @ all and found out tht ur friend just snagged ur ex?
Jess_Love 0
yeah.. ... it's better than him not asking... and then bringing her there and telling you they're going out :P you gotta look on the bright side :P
BaBiiSpAnKy821 0
im sorry... ill be ur new best friend... i obviously wnt wanna dat ur x (:
CMSmithhh 0
Rofl, Good Idea!
88sforlife 0
Don't Respond To Any More Callz
anonymous595 0
haha