Today, after a few drinks my dad decided to tell me the story of how I was born. He wanted a baby girl after my brother, and mum didn't want any more children. So he tricked her by giving her the wrong pill. That should explain a lot. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML
Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML
Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML
Today, my dad told me quite bluntly that, while he loved me, he never planned to have me. My mom baby-trapped him by sabotaging their birth control methods, and my existence ruined his life irrevocably and caused the functional alcoholism he has suffered with for 40 years. FML
Today, my dad took me to a bar for my first legal drink. He quickly got "drunk" and started slurring that I was an accident, saying the only reason I'm alive is because he'd been too poor to pay for an abortion. As I started crying, he burst out laughing and said soberly, "Just kidding, son." FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML
Today, I asked my dad if I was a planned baby. He asked me if the crazy drunken party he and my mom had nine months prior to my birth counted. FML
Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML
Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. FML
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Top comments
kscott88 0
Well, it shows how much he loves you, yeah?
cashmuhlah23 0
Your dad wanted you Thats the brightside
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Comments (108)
un_known_fml 0
Well - you didn't really think that ALL children are eagerly wanted and warmly expected? If you did, then it is a bit naive. You should rather consider how your parents have raised you - if they were good and loving, then nothing is wrong. If not - well, then FYL if you are taking it that badly.
pingu_fml 0
lol #7 :D #68, oh dear :S I wouldn't tell people that...
Oriina 0
Well ... does you mommy love you anyways?
BluuFox 0
Thats just absolutley horrible! :(
blackxmortals 0
FYl cause your dad's such an asshole.
BunnyEars 0
That's so sad D: I'm so sorry.
comedychick 1
wooow well parents told me I was a mistake, suppose to be a boy and I wrecked the boy girl pattern, AND that I was supposed to be an aborted baby :| yeaa, not the best day of my life lol
zebrapattern 6
it should explain alot? so it doesn't?
starberries 0
What kind of ******-up family do you have where Dad hands out the birth control?
Leatherandlace 0
He fairly obviously REPLACED her pills.
angiebear1234 3
don't really get how u life sucks .?