Kids: Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He...

By adeeri - 04/09/2014 01:24 - United States - Jackson

Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 304

You deserved it 3 230

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Same thing different taste

By butisavedyourkid - 06/06/2013 04:13 - United States

Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 277

You deserved it 3 544

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 190

You deserved it 3 238

By buttpain - 01/12/2016 18:29

Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 623

You deserved it 845

By Braxam - 15/06/2011 16:42 - United States

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 602

You deserved it 3 646

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 20:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 655

You deserved it 6 659

By mandy - 10/04/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 295

You deserved it 3 561

Sorry sweetie

By ddhaley1 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Edmond

Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 813

You deserved it 3 332

By Anonymous - 09/06/2019 12:41

Today, I tripped over a kid at work. She was sitting on the floor with her legs sticking out into the walkway. Her mom caused a scene, accusing me of doing it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 854

You deserved it 104

By klutz - 10/08/2009 14:34 - United States

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 860

You deserved it 56 857

By Collin - 10/06/2010 19:59 - United States

Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 842

You deserved it 4 525

Miss_Chevious 37

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:02

You should have said "its okay" by pinching his nose

tony1891 22

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:03

how does he say hello i wonder?

Comments

Miss_Chevious 37

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:02

You should have said "its okay" by pinching his nose

ryanpreiss 17

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:17

*Omanomnomnomnom*

urdirtyolduncle 15

Thursday 4 September 2014 14:01

^that's only appropriate if there are cookies involved.

Miss_Chevious 37

Thursday 4 September 2014 15:17

what do cookies have anything to do with a stray child biting strangers?

noah_1234 24

Friday 5 September 2014 1:24

because of the comment above him

CaptainCola 7

Friday 5 September 2014 9:10

Probably the brother of the little girl that didn't pass her swim lesson :p

MeanBeagle 22

Wednesday 12 November 2014 0:08

and this is how zombie apocalypses start...

JMichael 25

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:02

Kids are such brats these days..

abattior 18

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:13

i don't think kids can be brats when they're raised well.

incoherentrmblr 21

Friday 5 September 2014 4:38

...and zombies...

tony1891 22

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:03

how does he say hello i wonder?

hippo1234 19

Thursday 4 September 2014 15:09

I'd probably wear a cup for that...

abattior 18

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:07

some parents he got..

Sandsh8rk 36

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:11

Say 'it's okay' by throwing him into the pool.

olpally 32

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:15

"Accidentally" shove him in the pool now.

Liamj774 36

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:18

Oh noes!

abe7654 9

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:20

Bite him back

classycoop 12

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:25

Say you are HIV positive and see the look on his face ╚(•⌂•)╝

MichellinMan 20

Thursday 4 September 2014 14:12

Damn that would've been one hell of a bite then.

anormalperson 25

Thursday 4 September 2014 17:26

I don't think a little kid would know what HIV is....

worldclassrager 39

Thursday 4 September 2014 12:31

Was his name Bruce? (Jaws)

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Kids Awkward Party Miscellaneous Embarrassing Relatable Animals Cats Friends AITA Health Cheating Diets Healthy Lifestyle Weddings Love Ironic Coworkers Dreams Shopping Sports Annoying Family Money Work Parenting Transportation Cars Accident Home improvement

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I agree, your life sucks 7 563

You deserved it 1 630

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. When I told the man that I wanted Tinkerbell on my lower back area. He snorted and told me that I was way too old to have Tinkerbell on me, and that Disney characters are only cute on people 35 and younger. I'm 23. FML

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You deserved it 13 491

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Today, my dad accused me of being illiterate when I used a word he'd never heard of, saying it sounded like lazy slang, and that it wasn't a real word. He then yelled at me for being a "smartass who's always right" when I read aloud the definition from his 1978 copy of Webster's dictionary. Guess he's not enthused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 541

You deserved it 102

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I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 55

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I agree, your life sucks 1 321

You deserved it 186

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I agree, your life sucks 24 425

You deserved it 1 565

Today, my ex stuck it in the wrong hole because he couldn’t find the right one, then he sucked my toes. I'm never going near another man again after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 271

Today, I discovered I don’t even have the dexterity to screw the cap back onto a bottle of soda without dropping it. Not only that, but mother saw the need to point it out and laugh at me, so people around us in the store stared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 590

You deserved it 135

Same thing different taste

Sorry sweetie

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