Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant.... - FML

By twit - 16/3/2009 01:14 - United States

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

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What did I do?

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By mat - 21/1/2009 06:02 - France

Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML

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By Mr_poole - 18/5/2013 20:06 - United States - Castle Rock

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

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By notmycircus - 2/12/2014 05:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, the school counselor asked me to leave the grief counseling group for the death of my sister. Apparently, I scare the others. FML

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By elmalo68 - 20/9/2009 01:22 - United States

Today, I must find a gentle way to tell my 71-year-old mother that she's too old to be wearing shirts that expose her belly. FML

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By Cow_girl_cutie - 3/8/2011 07:47 - United States

Today, I was texting my boyfriend. He continued to tell me how he had to piss. We carried on this conversation for about 10 minutes, then I realized that was the most interesting conversation I have had with him in weeks. FML

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By Anonymous - 28/9/2010 14:03 - Canada

Today, I'm the only one at work in a small office. The water tank sprung a leak. Guess who had to call the boss and get instructions via cell phone to turn it off? I can't even leave the office to change my soaked clothes, because I need to wait for an important phone call. Seven hours to go. FML

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By silenceisgolden - 23/3/2020 01:39

Train guy

Today, a guy on the train was using his phone really loudly, asking Siri to call a bunch of people, or using voice command to do the most menial things. He was really, really noisy. It's only after I couldn't stand it any more and asked him to be quieter that I noticed the white cane next to him. FML

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By Anonymous - 29/2/2012 16:52 - United States

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML

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By furious parent - 3/7/2019 18:00

Today, I caught my mother telling my 11-year-old daughter that if she wants to be happy in life, she needs to start exercising now, because fat can creep up on you, and rich guys never marry fat girls with nice personalities. I was fuming. FML

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By CrazzY88s - 6/6/2010 16:00 - Ireland

Today, I bought an apartment over what I have just learned to be an Irish folk music store. FML

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By great - 28/2/2015 16:23 - United States - Porter

Today, the girl I've been seeing for just over a week casually let me know that she'll slash her wrists if I ever leave her. FML

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By ohhelllllno - 20/4/2009 10:05 - Canada

Today, the $300 ring my boyfriend gave me for my birthday slipped off my finger... into the toilet. I had to sift through my own poo to get it back. FML

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By Mothertucker - 8/3/2017 00:00

Today, I came across one of the pitfalls of having open discussions with my 15-year-old son when he asked me how to shave his pubes. FML

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By wakinginvegas87 - 5/9/2010 15:49 - United States

Today, it was my boyfriend's parents' anniversary so I thought I'd do something to impress them. I made them chocolate-covered strawberries. But for some reason they gave me really dirty looks when they saw it. Turns out his mother is allergic to strawberries and his father is allergic to chocolate. FML

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By SupermarketSally - 25/11/2016 13:45 - Australia - Perth

Today, a customer threw a bottle of milk at me because we'd moved our smoke counter 6 months earlier during our renovations. Moved it five metres to the right that is. He marched out of the store, then marched back, grabbed the milk from my hands, threw $5 at me and then left again. FML

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By robertsonjimmy - 14/6/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, I let my new puppy outside for the first time. When I went to get him, I saw a man running off with him. FML

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By R_U_CEREAL - 4/7/2009 08:58 - United States

Today, I woke up finding myself violently humping my pillow. My mom recorded it. FML

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By off the family - 17/6/2018 20:30

Today, my daughter apparently have had enough of my mother-in-law's favoritism and constant bashing at me by going: "Grandma, might I highly recommend death at this point." She's 7. FML

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By Anonymous - 31/12/2011 06:21 - United States

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

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By saintmichi - 1/2/2010 00:21 - Poland

Today, after a 9 hour train journey through the Polish mountains, I mistook a small black and white cat for a penguin. FML

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By DravensMommy - 6/8/2009 19:22 - United States

Today, I woke up with a black eye. Why? My husband was having a dream where he was fighting somebody and wound up punching me in the face in his sleep. I had a very important job interview this morning. FML

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By SmokeWeedErdayAllDay - 18/4/2020 17:00

Cheap

Today, I was in the mood for some coffee, which is right down the street. I brought ten dollars with me, not knowing how much I'd need. When I approached the counter, the barista looked at my hand holding the ten-dollar bill and said, "Oh, our cheap things are on the left side of the menu." FML

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By anonymous - 6/11/2010 21:08 - Canada

Today, I found out that a street performer makes more money than I do. I have a full time job at the bank. FML

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By - 7/2/2020 18:00

Bachelor party

Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML

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By bbb - 11/1/2017 07:36

Today, I wasn't able to reply to Facebook chat message immediately, so my friends planned holiday and bought flights without me. FML

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By anon - 31/1/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML

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By dicksonthebrain - 26/9/2014 13:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

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By void bowels() { cry(); } - 26/11/2014 20:45 - United Kingdom - Caerphilly

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

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By Anonymous - 5/11/2018 05:00

Today, I got into a car accident and totaled my car. Also today, someone bought themselves $600 worth of office furniture online with my bank info. My bank doesn’t believe me so they won’t help me get the money back. I'm broke and carless. FML

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By Celeste - 2/3/2010 09:14 - Singapore

Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML

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By heartbroken - 22/1/2010 01:18 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML

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By Anonymous - 24/8/2012 02:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

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By Bitch its me - 17/1/2009 11:11 - Korea Republic of

Today, I got up at five, got dressed, and walked halfway to work in the snow. I then realized that it's Sunday. I also forgot my keys. FML

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By Gimmie a spare - 19/4/2016 20:45 - United States - Memphis

Today, as usual, I went to pick up my brother and sister from school in the rain. When we got to my truck, I realized I had locked us out. We had to walk home in the rain, only to find the spare house key had not been put back in its spot since the last time it was used. FML

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By MissIsabel - 3/11/2010 10:43 - France

Today, I went to Ikea with my family. I was wearing a yellow polo that vaguely looked like the ones the Ikea employees were wearing. Two dozen people came up to me, complaining that I was staring at furniture instead of helping customers. FML

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By soldierboy - 30/8/2010 00:39 - United States

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

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By lonely girl - 2/7/2013 06:47 - United States - Oregon City

Today, I got angry after not being able to have an orgasm. What was I angry at? My own hand. FML

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By laydeegaga - 7/3/2010 08:13

Today, my mom cleaned my room, while doing so she found a very detailed sex book I got from an ex boyfriend as a "gift". For years I had her convinced I was still a virgin, until today. FML

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By Chan - 26/9/2011 01:57 - United States

Today, I spilled hot coffee all over this man at work. I tried apologizing and saying it was an accident, but he then complained, which resulted in me being unemployed. The man I spilled coffee on was my uncle. FML

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By Anonymous - 2/9/2013 20:37 - United States - Mountain Home

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

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Top comments

By lesman | 0

#34356 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:04

Hate to say it man, but if you can't tell a box of cookies from a box of rocks, you deserved it. :p

By fredmeepbob | 0

#34376 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:20

@4
I THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY.
THEY DID DOWNSIZE THEM.
I FUCKING KNEW IT.

COMMENTS

By lesman | 0

#34356 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:04

Hate to say it man, but if you can't tell a box of cookies from a box of rocks, you deserved it. :p

Reply

ilovechocochipz | 0

#948545 - Monday 15 March 2010 4:52

your supposed to order them and there delivered later and you put your name in a form you should do some more research for next time.

Reply

pyrotim25 | 0

#988340 - Tuesday 4 May 2010 21:05

actually girl scouts I know sell them directly until they run out

Reply

RawrrrImADino | 0

#1100041 - Saturday 17 July 2010 2:51

i'm a gs and we sell our leftover cookies at lowes and walmart...

Reply

ARScratch | 0

#1173855 - Monday 2 August 2010 2:14

#1 Made me LOL

Reply

monkeykiller77 | 0

#1311361 - Saturday 28 August 2010 8:33

[email protected] shut the fuck up

Reply

Herropreez17 | 0

#2683377 - Wednesday 15 June 2011 2:49

In his defense those girl scouts are some crafty bitches...

Reply

Chowderlick | 9

#4178436 - Saturday 17 March 2012 17:41

Ha ha nigga

By lolcorez | 0

#34359 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:07

didn't you like check inside the boxes to see just in case?

Reply

_Noon_ | 0

#379181 - Wednesday 8 July 2009 18:00

Yeah, cause who knows, it might be a scamming girl scout.. I mean come on, what are the odds?

Reply

_Dawning_ | 0

#398003 - Wednesday 15 July 2009 8:02

DUH THAT WAS NOT A REALLY GIRL SCOUT!! girl scouts don't scam you. I have friends that are girl scouts. I know it is upsetting but don't f-ing blame it all on the organization...gezz.

Reply

TWSSMoment | 0

#843543 - Thursday 11 February 2010 5:16

well she wasn't expecting to be scammed by girl scouts....what are they teaching these girl scount now a day?!how to be berny madoff?

Reply

bballchamp43 | 0

#970417 - Monday 29 March 2010 7:01

they are adapting to the modern ecenomic market

Reply

Clare420 | 0

#1021049 - Sunday 6 June 2010 2:21

lol #166 is right

Reply

roflrawrlol | 0

#3027392 - Wednesday 3 August 2011 6:39

except for his spelling of economy, he is not right.

Reply

roflrawrlol | 0

#3027400 - Wednesday 3 August 2011 6:41

economic* fuck, I've ruined a perfectly good troll statement >.>

By stolen_sammich | 0

#34361 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:09

lol, poor you! especially with the prices of GS cookies these days.

By pizzle | 0

#34363 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:12

[email protected]#2... you never can trust those girl scouts...

they totally downsized the thin mints box this year!

Reply

sashalynn | 0

#1592242 - Sunday 24 October 2010 1:45

Nah, samosas are the way to gp. :-)

By k649 | 0

#34368 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:15

#2, who ever checks boxes of cookies? Hahah

And that seriously sucks, but you would think you could feel a slight difference.

By fredmeepbob | 0

#34376 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:20

@4
I THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY.
THEY DID DOWNSIZE THEM.
I FUCKING KNEW IT.

Reply

TWSSMoment | 0

#843531 - Thursday 11 February 2010 5:13

Omfg!!!I knew it to girl scounts are just trying to scam people.I need those cookies to get me through mw2.those girl scounts need to be shot!

Reply

qwertyuiopdead | 0

#996331 - Monday 17 May 2010 21:24

agreed 4 and 6

Reply

iceliebedich | 7

#3260827 - Friday 9 September 2011 6:01

I'm a girl scout and I don't scam people...us girls are not in charge of making the cookies but we have to sell them(I sell them $4 a box) and yea they are pricey and downsized, but so good...but FYL for getting scammed by a scanner, you really need to be able to tell the difference, a girl scout carries around an order form where as a scanner doesn't..and plus a girl scout would have their leaders number in case you want to get ahold of their leader...make sense?

Reply

Pwuj | 6

#5426968 - Saturday 30 March 2013 4:41

Shit I'd pay to see a scanner scam people.,

Reply

FeedTheStache | 13

#6048817 - Tuesday 26 August 2014 21:26

#6 haha that made my day. I'm not the only one feeling ripped off

By mf_fml | 0

#34381 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:23

triflin'-ass bitches.

By DuchessAngel37 | 0

#34389 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:29

Dude, the economy is rough on them scouts too!

By llamatrauma | 5

#34391 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:29

sweet parenting...

By Jimboom | 11

#34415 - Monday 16 March 2009 9:48

Vendetta on all Girl Scouts! Hunt down random packs of GS's and pelt them with cheap store brought biscuits as a lesson to them