Today, a creepy old guy kept hitting on me in line at Subway. I got scared and told him to back off because my dad was waiting for me outside. He replied that he wouldn't object to a three-way. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took the train to visit my parents, which arrives late at night. As I was getting off, the cute guy in front of me looked out the window, then turned to me and said, "Doesn't that guy out there give you the creeps?" That guy was my dad. FML
Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML
Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with, "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML
Today, I was at the airport, on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was four years-old. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to fuck off. The strange man was my father. FML
Today, I met my father, who I hadn't seen since I was a baby, at Subway. He made me pay for his meal. FML
Today, while shopping, my dad asked me to walk further away from him, saying I was cramping his style in front of all the chicks there. FML
Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML
Today, I was waiting for my friend outside a restaurant when a man walked up and said, “You must be Sarah.” I said no to get rid of him. He apologized and walked away. Two minutes later, my friend arrived and asked why I was talking to her dad. FML
Today, on the train, a man kept grabbing my crotch. When I told him to stop, I got yelled at for harassing an elderly man. FML
Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML
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Top comments
drbobbz 16
Well, he thought you were there for a 6 inch!
JustBecausePie 12
That's ****** up on so many levels.
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Comments (79)
ljrdz 7
was he republican?
buckdharma 38
Tell him your dad's not into that, but you'll give him a combo. Then you kick him in his nuts and hand him a bag of chips.
emilyg2014 14
"Um, I think I'll take that on Italian."
p36288 17
Why not call the police?
fader48080 10
I am both grossed out and impressed at the same time.
sprints54 19
Shoulda told him you were still pre-op
jesuisfatigue777 5
Well, it's a good thing you weren't alone and had someone there for you outside
stephanyovalle 15
Harassment is harassment no matter if it's a young handsome man, or an old weird one. If you get stuck with a creep in the train/subway; what I find helpful, is to get down the train, in a station before my destination, if the guy follows me, wait till the last minute and hop on the train again before the doors get closed, so he'll get stuck in a different station and I continue my trip :)
_3rdeye 10
taser. invest in a taser.
nrwl_30 17
Gross...?...?