Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend came to my room and we were kissing. He was being exceptionally aggressive and intense when my brother knocked outside my door, demanding I open it. He had to jump out while I was fumbling to fix my top and cover my marks with my hair. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML
Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML
Today, my boyfriend starting going off on me, calling me a psycho, all because I opened our bedroom door while he was in there. FML
Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML
Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
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Top comments
illusionay 10
At least he cares about you
Wolfipoo 31
Sucks to be you OP, but seriously, be more careful and check next time.
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Comments (113)
illusionay 10
At least he cares about you
Murilirum 23
It's one of those 'embarrassingly cute' kind of situations.
Gwyddone 29
Same thought here, I'd feel equal parts embarrassed and loved. Awkward situation, sure, but at loves her little brother loves OP...
trollcrusher 17
Hopefully OP was touched by her brother's caring attitude... even if that wasn't the sort of touch she was hoping for.
RustlingSoul 26
that doesn't sound right, 80.
Wolfipoo 31
Sucks to be you OP, but seriously, be more careful and check next time.
youngmessi252525 20
Why wouldn't you check first, ydi
memed_fml 17
op did check.. just not well enough
pedopears 18
#20 I bet OP pulled the same face as your profile picture..
WordBea 23
Shouldn't you at least check before assuming no ones home?
lurker_no_more 13
it doesn't say anywhere in the fml that she assumed that..
LeashaJoy5595 28
Assuming always leads to very bad consequences! Always check before you get loud
EliGolsdworthy 7
It's implied
fahadleo66 9
Get some locks in your room.
devildog562 33
"Why you breathing so hard ?" " why are you hurting my brother ." So many possible outcomes could have arose from this and I thank you,op , for making me laugh so much in the moaning, I mean morning .
MassiDelta 28
If your door has a lock, then YDI, but if your door doesn't, then maybe try being more quiet
T1A2Z3 35
They thought no one was home. Why would they?
Bleublancrouge_fml 13
Bitch, he was very nice, be glad you have an awesome brother like that. And be respectful of your family next time. No sex when people are here. It's like...the least you can do, because people WILL here you.
leogachi 15
You deserve it for not actually checking to see if anyone was home.
daddysgirl243 21
it's good that he cares about you. but actually make sure no one is home next time