Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter making out with a piece of paper with someone from the cast of IT taped to her pillow. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML
Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML
Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
Smart kid. She seems like the responsible sort.
flockz 19
scotch tape isn't safe enough. as her mother i hope you suggested duct tape.
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Comments (203)
fmljulia 1
Lol. That's not really a FML....
sirpantselot 22
I knew pregnancy came from kissing!
ChazzyWazzy1998 10
Well at least she won't get a cold sore lmao!x
ubetchya 1
Wow you let your 11-year old daughter have a boyfriend? Fail...
dogpup4 23
The daughter lied and said he wasn't her boyfriend, she didn't let her have a boyfriend.
SMHsohard 22
No, she didn't lie, she's at the age where it's ok to have a friend who's a boy, but having a boyfriend is icky.
7yzzFML 17
What the hell is wrong with having a boyfriend? Maybe not all tweens were still playing with barbie dolls by then unlike you
mockingjaygirl16 8
11 year olds are kissing now? What is wrong with society?
smilingxbleeding 9
It's a innocent thong, little kids do it too. We are not talking about making out, but a peck on the lips!
mockingjaygirl16 8
11 year olds should be busy having fun and being good kids rather than kissing each other. It's inappropriate for that age.
SMHsohard 22
It's actually normal pre-adolescent behavior. They're outgrowing the "eeewww, cooties" stage, and it's once again acceptable to be seen with someone of the opposite sex. This is also the age where parents have to be a visible presence, as those hormones are starting to flow and kids need guidance as to what is acceptable and what isn't.
mockingjaygirl16 8
At 11? I don't think so. At 11 kids shouldn't even think that kissing is acceptable.
SMHsohard 22
I didn't say all 11 year olds are running around being kissing bandits, but they are growing out of childhood into adolescence, and curiosity is a normal thing. That's why it's so important for parents to provide age appropriate sex education, and not expect the school system to do all their work for them. I remember doing a little "kissy face" with a boy pal at that age; afterwords, we were like "Okay, that was kind of weird." Never went any farther.
mockingjaygirl16 8
Can you imagine having the sex talk with an 11 year old? Kids are too ready to grow up.
SMHsohard 22
Um, I had the sex talk when I was 11, and that was 45 years ago! What rock are you living under? An 11 year old should be ready to hear basic information.
aok0989 10
11 is an appropriate age to have the sex talk. Especially since they'd be going through puberty soon. You never want to wait too long and risk something happening. Also kissing at that age is completely innocent. Kissing isn't a sexual thing, it's more of a friendly thing. I mean even two year olds kiss their friends. At that age kissing isn't about sex it's more just a friendly display of affection just like hugging is.
RadeonDerp 24
I know its a typo but... IT'S AN INNOCENT THONG BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
SMHsohard 22
Wonder what #90 would think of the boy who kept trying to kiss me, was totally relentless, went so far as to back me into a corner in his eagerness. We were both 6. I decked him, he grew up to be a minister.
FlyingPie 17
I don't understand the big deal about children kissing. Parents often kiss their children and vice versa; why wouldn't it cross a child's mind to kiss a friend?
7yzzFML 17
@mockingjaygirl16 wow, what is wrong with you? Were you homeschooled or kept underground all your life? At school we had full sex ed in year 5, when most of us turned 11, and it was the perfect time to have it because we were starting to get very curious. And 11 year olds cant kiss? You are very odd... Kids dont think about sex like that at that age, they just 'like' each other and want to kiss and cuddle them, its perfectly innocent. Obviously you must have been raised wrong or something because you dont understand human very well..
baref00tmama 15
What is wrong with YOU that you think this is new?
RachaelBouwsma23 6
She gets more action than me, fml.
XxDevilxXGt 26
Hopefully not with duct tape.
bexxiiee 11
Aaaaand you interrupted them why? O_o
emmybug22 1
Too cute!
silvanna 6
I understand her. When i was eleven i thought baby's were made by kissing and that the guy would put a little seed in the girls mouth and that would make the baby grow inside the girl.