Anonymous
Ireland
Stop perving
Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Latte
Boston, United States
Latte
Today, I ordered my usual at my local coffee shop. The barista asked, “Name for the order?” For some reason, my brain short-circuited and I said, “Latte.” So they called out “Latte” when it was ready, and I had to shame-walk to the counter. FML
lifedoessuck12
Philippines
It's not what you think
Today, I had to wait outside Starbucks. While standing, I started daydreaming and didn't notice I had been staring at a table beside the window for a long time. Suddenly, someone came up to me and said, "Try not to be so obvious." Sitting at the table was a girl with a huge cleavage. FML
Anonymous
United States
Creepypasta
Today, while I was working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good… you left a nipple." and slowly licked it off. FML
Jeffery89000
Toronto, Canada
Fight or flight
Today, I went to my favorite coffee shop, ordered my usual, smiled at the barista I have a crush on, and confidently said, "You too!" when they told me to enjoy my drink. I have to find a new coffee shop. FML
Anonymous
United States
All you need is hate
Today, I was trying to flirt with a cute girl when I asked the barista, “Make mine just like hers.” It turns out she'd ordered a decaf soy lavender tea latte. I hate all of those words. FML
Christine.T
Boston, United States
Morning joe
Today, I stopped at the coffee shop before work and confidently ordered "my usual." The barista looked confused but nodded. When my drink came, it was completely wrong. Turns out, I was in the wrong coffee shop. I was too embarrassed to correct them, so I drank a weird matcha-pumpkin spice sludge. FML
Jim
Doofus
Today, I went to my favorite café to order my usual iced latte. The barista smiled and said, “The usual, right?” I nodded confidently, except she wasn’t talking to me. She handed the drink to the guy behind me and said, “Thanks, babe.” He winked at her. I just paid for my drink in silence, praying for a sinkhole to open. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
United States
Entitled
Today, while I was working at Starbucks, a customer dumped a hot chocolate on me and yelled, saying it wasn't his order. The order actually belonged to a 4-year-old boy with the same name, who started screaming when he didn't get his chocolate. FML
Anonymous
Introvert moment
Today, I worked up the courage to order coffee on my own instead of using the app. When the barista asked, “Name?” I froze and blurted out my email address. They called out my full name plus numbers and I had to claim it like that was normal. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Nice
Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML
Top comments
glenzhao2 16
Why? What was on your chest? Give us a pic and we'll find it; don't worry.
chelle_starlight 0
you must have a "grande" chest...sorry...I know this comment is lame...couldn't think of anything else to say...haha
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Comments (240)
glenzhao2 16
Why? What was on your chest? Give us a pic and we'll find it; don't worry.
damon199 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
fail
510lobita510 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 13
lmBrown 0
Agree with 29
therealsuperman 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 36
Ariasmake_1 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 37
takeapieandrun 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Agree with 37.
ayleyyasuko 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 41
sarah48_fml 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 41
DU0 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Agree with 44.
sixtimessix 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
agree with 46
DU0 0
SHUN THE NON BELIEVER!
grandpaearthling 2
you can't shun someone that's ******* while she disagrees. that would be impolite. wait until she gets off the ride
DU0 0
My bad. : x
fiveonefiveoh 0
agree with 48!!!
ImNotAnAngel 0
Agree with 81
rockhound 0
I am not opposed to 69
v1kt4r 13
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!
waswashere 0
SHUN!!!
rallets 23
so youre not opposed to 69 eh? ;)
b6000 0
48..... you are very pretty :)
andrewgrimm 0
uh oh not another pedo bear ;)
zakkyzebra 11
agree with 85
andyp010 10
agree with 53
Bad_Boy1321 0
agree with 112
akd1v 0
why not, agree with 115
rgermain 0
Ha I was waiting for it 85
DudeImBetter 0
I agree with 122.
Hide_Yo_Kids 0
Agree wit 123
12596 0
agree with 125 disagree with everyone else
5t3ff1k4h 47
You guys are all ******* lame.
LouieLZ 5
Agree with 133
Tempuser117 2
Agree with 130, But not with 133 who is jealous of our skillz.
bethany_camille 0
what are we taking about?? :p
Arisakentaro 0
agree with 136
DanielleSaysHell 0
agree with 48
justnbieber 0
agree with 13
lexi122333 0
agree with 47
lexi122333 0
who agrees with 46
xGraycloud 4
agree with whatever number was before me. :S
slitherbomb 0
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
Bosia 0
Agree with whoever the hell I'm supposed to agree with.
AMagicalLeoplura 0
lol 49
Calyspe 0
hahaha
valdancer99 0
jb? wtf
johnnyredcorn 5
This whole thread is a ******* joke.
WinterPerfection 3
^^ Thank You Captain Obvious
WhoIsThe 7
I agree with myselves.
lVluse 15
Down-votes. Down-votes everywhere.
jc10x 8
Dont agree with any of you. Incompotent baboons, the lot of you.
cumberbunny 17
Agree with no one.
ShadowlessSpear 21
Oh look, a herd of sheep just passed by.
bab_chik25 1
Take it as a compliment.
DaveOnDope 4
Yep, she has a gift. I used to work across a table from a busty redhead. she used to wear sheer tops just for me to watch her and make her feel sexy.
therealsuperman 0
^ that must be good dope Dave
eryn13 5
agreed
Hockeyboy4280 18
39- Win
tygerarmy 35
It's not a compliment because the OP does not find the barista attractive, anyone who is not attractive and stares is a perv.
DaveOnDope 4
California's finest Sour D!
DaveOnDope 4
yeah the old double standard. "I dress this way to be looked at. Why are you looking at me?"
Lord_of_0 4
There's no indication that OP was dressed provocatively, and it's possible for something to be potentially flattering and offensive at the same time. She could take it as a compliment, but she doesn't want to because he was being a perv.
johnnyredcorn 5
You all clearly didn't see the male gender sign beside the post, which is why it is an FML, because he does not have ****, unless he's fat...
twilightluvr101 4
213 u sir are a dumbass because it clearly shows that op is in fact a girl!
johngaltmovement 8
213- seriously?
clarkey 0
troll
chelle_starlight 0
you must have a "grande" chest...sorry...I know this comment is lame...couldn't think of anything else to say...haha
xStarKillerx 4
I'll give you an E for effort.
GetaLifePlease 0
I'll give him an E as in I wish E was a bra size
marleyvk 0
E is a bra size, im an E.
xStarKillerx 4
35 I read your profile and I must say that I love your Matrix reference.
Dragons_corner 6
24 their really is a bra size E. It's also know as DDD. I have seen a pair of E's but they were implant not real boobs.
jckbco 0
hater
5t3ff1k4h 47
89 - DDD is equivalent to size F. I believe DD is the same as a size E. E isn't a common size since most people tend to make bras that go from D to DD to DDD/F.
grumpybarista 0
35 is 15 and wears an E?!
eclecticstrings 0
^ that's not really shocking. my girlfriend's 14 and she's a DD
instnt1nfction 17
I don't get any of this stuff
invadersara 3
she could also be fat fat people gave big boobs to.
johnnyredcorn 5
You must have a pretty fat 14 year old girlfriend.
Blacksabbath211 9
Bras are confusing to non-females D: Only thing you need to know how to do is get em off ;)
DU0 0
... ... What was that? Too busy staring...
enoughgrace 4
...huh... ...grande... ...milk... ...drizzle... ...steam...
xStarKillerx 4
Didn't you choose to wear the revealing top?
damon199 0
how do you know she was wearing a revealing top? You know, when you assume, you're just being a bitch.
funktown 2
LOL nice 15
xStarKillerx 4
Revealing, as in perhaps some cleavage has been exposed. Not necessarily meaning she was parading around like a hooker. Didn't mean it that way. But yeah, FHL for having been ogled at by some barista perv.
Ducklingo 0
I'm sure there was a good reason for it, maybe there was a butterfly on your chest and it was too majestic to not look at.
InnocentLies 0
Hi Bambi :))
SilentxChaos 0
Umm, I think it's, "when you assume you make an ass out of u and me." Not a bitch ;) Nice try.
JManHobbs 0
#69 - Are you trying to make yourself look stupid or does it come naturally?
beeship321 5
Itsnt a Batista a woman?
DocBastard 40
No, he was a Cuban dictator until 1959. What, she said "Batista!!" I'm just answering her silly question.
5t3ff1k4h 47
25/StarKiller - It wouldn't have been a revealing shirt. Baristas from Starbucks always have to wear a uniform. On weekends, they wear a tee-shirt, so they're covered up to their necks. I'm pretty sure any other day they have to wear a tee-shirt underneath a golf shirt/polo. They also have to wear an apron, so her chest in comparison to her stomach would have been minimized simply by that fact.
5t3ff1k4h 47
My mistake, I misread the FML. Either way, you still don't know if she was wearing a low cut shirt. 96 - No. There are male baristas.
Rdozer 0
Ha ha Win 15
dayve 0
nice
FMLephant 2
At least he wasn't mesmerized by your chickstache.
junkboy 4
you have nice ****... whats the big deal?
champ10 0
wats the fml??