By Anonymous - Sweden

Seeing is believing

Today, while taking a shower, I thought that the bathroom was extra steamy because of all the hot water. It wasn't until two-three minutes later when I put some shampoo in my hair that I realized I had forgotten to take my glasses off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9397

You deserved it

39387

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Health

Season finale

It never rains…

Kids will be kids

By Anonymous

Today, after 2 years of paying off the insurance fees after an accident, I got rear-ended. It was the same driver who crashed into me the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2355

You deserved it

121

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after my check cleared for my half of the $1000 deposit on our new apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25161

You deserved it

2353

Favorite

By WTF - United States - Bloomington

Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend because she wanted to be with a man who has an income and a stable career. We are seniors in college and I accepted a really good job offer which I start once I graduate, which she knows about. She dumped me for a drug dealer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30896

You deserved it

2152

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By Scarred for life - United States - Eagle River

Today, I went on a blind date. The first words that came out of his mouth were, "Rape isn't bad if you think about it." FML

I agree, your life sucks

11696

You deserved it

1317

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By honeybunny - United States - Norman

Today, I am 11 weeks pregnant and my husband has taken great glee in the fact that his horrible gas is enough to trigger my morning sickness. We're about to go on a long 12 hour drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34930

You deserved it

3125

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By unwanted - United States

Today, I realized my wife often switches the TV channel from the crime dramas we both like, to Hollywood gossip shows that I can't stand, just to get me to leave the room. From the other room, I can see that she switches back once I've left. She's probably been doing this for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33954

You deserved it

3673

Favorite

By Failed_Dad - United States - Davis

Today, with the most certainty and confidence that I have ever seen in her, my 16-year-old daughter told me an egg is a fruit because of its "hard shell and growing seed." FML

I agree, your life sucks

24575

You deserved it

2706

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By Anonymous - 11/12/2020 16:58 - Germany - Ebersbach

Stealth attack

Today, I was cooking when I got jumped from behind by my friend's cat, who thought my back would make a great lookout perch. Yesterday he tried to sharpen his claws on me. Last time I looked in the mirror I didn't look like a tree trunk, but maybe I need glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks

647

You deserved it

141

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By mark - United Kingdom

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for our anniversary. Mid-way through the meal, a guy at the table across left for the restroom. My girlfriend reached over and swiped the guy's wallet from the table. My gonads went AWOL, and I couldn't even bring myself to call her out on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10181

You deserved it

29035

Favorite

By anon - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26433

You deserved it

2886

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By anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, I decided to make home made french fries. I figured all I needed was potatoes and salt, right? Wrong! I also needed the fire department and an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19564

You deserved it

28233

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By Upset Mommy - United States

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

I agree, your life sucks

52844

You deserved it

3686

Favorite

Not really a good idea

Today, I decide to let my boyfriend introduce food into our sex life, then a few days after we used melted chocolate I got a UTI. I’ve never had a UTI before in my life so I’m blaming him for the fact it feels like I’m peeing needles dipped in acid. FML

I agree, your life sucks

905

You deserved it

2245

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - North Scituate

Today, I found a picture of my ex with a new boyfriend. This wouldn't be so bad if she didn't break up with me because she was lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22368

You deserved it

1851

Favorite

By im_a_mocker - United States

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23230

You deserved it

5856

Favorite

By failout - United States

Today, there was a story called "Looking Good" about fashion in school that ran in the local newspaper. On the front page of that section it featured a picture of my class. I was photoshopped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

70947

You deserved it

4993

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I got my first acting part. I played the role of a bad boy who has to grab the leading lady's ass, who then slaps me in the face. The ass grab was done in one take. The slap required 14 takes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43388

You deserved it

4992

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By homerr123 - India - Mumbai

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46850

You deserved it

3222

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31898

You deserved it

6343

Favorite

By CA19oo - United States

Today, I went to see one of my favorite bands. When they started playing my favorite song I whipped out my video camera and sang along. As I was reviewing the video later, I realized that I couldn't even hear the band over my horrible singing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9666

You deserved it

42410

Favorite

By mother of a complete idiot - 16/3/2021 21:30

Smart

Today, my daughter left a plate of food in her room for two hours. When I yelled at her about ants, her response was, "But I thought it took DAYS for ants to show up!" I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks

368

You deserved it

769

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By Taylor - United States

Today, my sister and I had a bonding moment. It consisted of me plucking her chin hairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24893

You deserved it

5572

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By Screwed

Today, I was informed that- despite an already skeletal staff- my supervisor is leaving the company. Tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4288

You deserved it

303

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By minikat

Today, my parents woke me up and grounded me for the "disrespectful" things I said to them in my sleep. Apparently I say these things every night, and each time I do they extend the grounding. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3988

You deserved it

241

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By chris - United States

Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44797

You deserved it

10723

Favorite

By Delilah - Norway

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30771

You deserved it

9712

Favorite

By Anonymous - 12/8/2020 14:02

Projection

Today, my boyfriend said angrily that he should never have gotten together with me, that he should have known a woman with divorced parents would have daddy issues, and never be quite right in the head. His own parents are divorced by the way, and his mom is extremely overbearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1525

You deserved it

148

Favorite

By Rhinobro01 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I was at a friend's house when his dad told me that he had Photoshopped his face onto a woman's body. I looked at the photo and said it was gross, disgusting and weird. Later on, my friend told me that the photo was actually a picture of his dad's twin sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1368

You deserved it

692

Favorite

By muffincakess - France

Today, I went to buy some spray paint for a project. I've never used a spray can before, so I decided to try it on paper provided. Unfortunately I didn't hold the can the right way and ended up with black, permanent, paint all over my face in the middle of a store. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9904

You deserved it

36963

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years decided to buy a $2500 taxidermied wolf on eBay. This is the same guy who refuses to get engaged because it would "cost too much right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks

36846

You deserved it

5745

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By Anonymous - Germany - Naurath

Today, I found out what a lightweight my girlfriend is. After having a couple of drinks, she began flirting, then grabbed my ass. She felt around a bit before freaking out and asking where my penis was. FML

I agree, your life sucks

53518

You deserved it

6115

Favorite

By convict possibly

Today, I got to try on a stunning suit that made me the handsomest man in the world. Upcoming prom? No. Wedding? No. I attended a date... A court date. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3316

You deserved it

2034

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a football game. During a time out, my face appeared on the Jumbotron during the Kiss Cam segment. I was sitting next to my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34372

You deserved it

2874

Favorite

By anonymaiacciu - France

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47634

You deserved it

8916

Favorite

By kalisa anteater - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I had to explain to my mother that a lace mini-dress with an obscene amount of cleavage was not appropriate to wear while meeting my boyfriend's parents. She called me an "annoying prude" and said that with my attitude, I don't deserve to have a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51214

You deserved it

4909

Favorite

By Anonymous

Worth a shot

Today, I told the guy I've been in love with for a year how I felt. He replied, "There will never be an us, but you can send nudes if you like." FML

I agree, your life sucks

1852

You deserved it

224

Favorite

By GLX - United States - Sand Springs

Today, I woke up to the rickety old ceiling fan above my bed crashing down on top of me. I'm fine, however I am now grounded until I can buy a new ceiling fan to replace the one I "broke". FML

I agree, your life sucks

4893

You deserved it

274

Favorite

By creepyguy - Australia

Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28223

You deserved it

9911

Favorite

By Egtat216 - United Kingdom - Aberdeen

Today, whilst tuning my guitar, one of the steel strings snapped and hit me in the face. Now I'm on my way to my first date with the girl of my dreams, and I'm wearing an eye patch and have a thick red line across my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15308

You deserved it

1455

Favorite

By fed up

Today, I bought a different car because I was having to constantly repair my old one. On the way home from the dealer, the check engine light came on. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2750

You deserved it

195

Favorite

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Top comments

By a2z1to11 | 0

#1502705 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:02

oh no your life us ruined now!!! not the glasses

By FFML_314 | 11

#1502738 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:05

OI! It's an FML, because the OP felt really stupid for thinking the bathroom was steaming up as opposed to his glasses.
I hope you all get it and enjoyed your lesson today on FML.

COMMENTS

By a2z1to11 | 0

#1502705 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:02

oh no your life us ruined now!!! not the glasses

Vehicle | 1

#1502869 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:27

Exactly. boring. happens to me all the time. next.

Vehicle | 1

#1502872 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:27

Exactly. boring. happens to me all the time. next.

By pencilcozy | 1

#1502709 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:02

Your life must be pretty damn good if this crap qualifies as an FML.

By Liv94 | 2

#1502719 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:03

is it just me, or does this FML seem really stupid?

By EROD78 | 0

#1502721 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:03

lmao thats a blond moment! x] but kind of a dumb FML

By Shorty2592 | 0

#1502723 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:03

how is this fml?

ichliebedich_fml | 0

#1503056 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 17:01

it obviously sucks wicked bad. how dare you not understand?

By ridder215 | 7

#1502728 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:04

Does that damage ur glasses?

By FYLDeep | 25

#1502732 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:04

Why? Do you usually take your showers in cold water? Why was the presence of the hot water enough to make you conclude that?

By chall16thvet | 0

#1502734 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:05

DUMBASS

By FFML_314 | 11

#1502738 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:05

OI! It's an FML, because the OP felt really stupid for thinking the bathroom was steaming up as opposed to his glasses.
I hope you all get it and enjoyed your lesson today on FML.

noscope_ftw | 0

#1502812 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:16

more like a "oh I'm a retard" not f my life...

By EminemTM | 0

#1502741 - Tuesday 5 October 2010 16:06

yeah dumb nutt