Today, my mom asked if I was seeing anyone. I launched into a description of my girlfriend, only for her to interrupt, saying that she meant a therapist, and the fact that I'd just made up a relationship was further proof that I needed one. I really do have a girlfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom asked me, once again, if my girlfriend of almost a year is just a cover up for being gay. FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted get to know my mom, so they went off and had a chat. After an hour, I noticed my girlfriend was gone and my mom was waiting for me. Apparently I've been dumped through my mother. FML
Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I didn't have one. She said "Exactly." FML
Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother insisted she's not homophobic, but however people only 'turn gay' because they were sexually abused, or are 'making it up to get attention'. She informed me I'm the former and my girlfriend is the latter. Uh huh. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, a friend of mine came to my house with tears in her eyes. I thought she was finally single so I could ask her out. Actually, her mother found out she was dating a girl, so she wants me to be her fake boyfriend as a cover-up. At least we're "dating" now. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML
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Top comments
thatnucca 36
You do! If she's a therapist, then it's a win-win situation for both parties...
Alex94xela 0
show her a vid of u 2 getting it on
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Comments (57)
thatnucca 36
You do! If she's a therapist, then it's a win-win situation for both parties...
sexysterlingarch 1
haha that's awesome
Mitcha857 0
damn sterling you get hated on for no reason! ok OP do you have a picture to prove you mother wrong? and if you do tell her she needs to be the one seeing a therapist
sexysterlingarch 1
22 yea I kno my comments always get thumbs down but I don't really care because I'm just saying what I want..
TurnpikeTwister 0
Just take them out to dinner so they can actually meet; if your mother is crazy / a bitch it's definitely better to use a neutral locale, otherwise I'd say have her over...
nivekcizia123 0
Lol i dont get it? ;)
glenzhao2 16
At least it wasn't, "she was right; I don't have a girlfriend"
CasualZombie 6
sure, you keep telling yourself that.
ILoveTabz 0
I have been reminded of spongebob
aurynforever 14
what's a spongebob?
landonlasater 3
46- now you're going to say what's a childhood
TheDrummingResul 0
what a bitch.
TheDrummingResul 0
what a bitch.
Leatherandlace 0
Redundant
Alex94xela 0
show her a vid of u 2 getting it on
HyVriD 5
You're a wise man son
MrSexyPants 14
How would she know the lady isn't a hooker?
ColorfulDonut 7
I'm sure you do. know let's go see that therapist, ok?
starwind3438 9
Now let's go take you to an English teacher.
Captainipples 0
Ha.
YacL 15
Ha.
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
Ha.
joblessalex 0
lame. combo breaker!
DelilahV 0
I'm gonna just go ahead and say "Ha." Ha! Attack is super effective!
ImInABox 6
Huzzah!
hockeyrocks39 0
Sounds like you might need a therapist because of your dysfunctional mother.
YayorNay 8
Bring home your girlfriend's panties for proof.
khaya 9
I have one to, "Stop struggling, Diane. Shoot, late for my therapist appointment. Now don't struggle too much or the handcuffs will cut you wrists."