Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided to poop in the middle of a crosswalk during heavy traffic. We have very strict laws (and fines) so I frantically tried to pick it up while cars waited, honking and watching me struggle like I was in the worst street performance ever. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, I was picking up after my dog with a poo baggie over my hand, like a mitten. Too bad the bottom ripped open and my bare hand poked through it just as I grabbed a big handful of steaming dog turd. FML
Today, I was walking my aunt's dog to the park and I grabbed a few doggy bags to pick up the poop. As it turns out, the bag had a small unnoticeable hole in it, that grew bigger as I fit my hand through it. I ended up using my hand to pick up the poop and didn't realize it. FML
Today, today while walking my dog in a different part of town, a man ran screaming out of his house, and threw a plastic bag at me. It was dog poop. It was the first time I'd ever walked in front of his house with my dog. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, I was walking my dog and he stopped to take a crap. While he was doing his business, I saw something white coming out of his butt that just wouldn't budge. He started whimpering and I stepped in to help him. I pulled out an entire plastic bag. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. After he took a dump, I went to pick it up but my glasses fell right in his poop. I didn’t have tissue, just the plastic bag. FML
Today, while walking my dog, I saw a hot guy so I tried to look chill. My dog chose that exact moment to take an enormous dump. I didn’t have any bags. The dude stared while I pretended to check my phone until he walked off. FML
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Top comments
drkate25 30
I would've called out to him and asked if he had an extra evidence bag you could borrow
Capt_Oblivious 10
Caught brown handed weren't you.
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Comments (192)
disney_blonde 16
For a few bucks you can get the bag dispenser that clips to the leash so you'll never forget it.
LouisianaBob 9
Need to remember to periodically check how many bags are in it as well unless of course it has some visual indicator that it is empty or visible contents.
alliegraywords 13
I would've used some leaves, tissues, a sock... anything but my bare hands. YDI.
Catkam623 27
A sock wouldn't have been a bad idea
TheNastyCat 7
Or they could've gone into some nearby place for a napkin or something. It's unlikely there wasn't some sort of house or something nearby.
FuKcMee 32
is your dog named KFC? cause its finger lickin good !
MrSassypants 33
The dog's name is actually Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya De la Rosa Ramirez.
tvbroken 6
Ew ..
Danni_04 13
Why didn't you go out with a poop scooper and bags? If you knew it was illegal then you only have yourself to blame for what happened.
KayleeT 9
Because I'm sure you've never forgotten anything before ...
ZeroPath5 16
I know it's illegal, but that cop could have been spending his time better than to watch someone walking a dog. FYL.
Bibliovore 26
While it wouldn't be worth it for a cop to follow a dog walker around, this one happened to see a dog in the act of pooping, so paused to see if OP would pick it up. Somehow I doubt this took more than a couple of minutes -- and the cop's watching apparently prevented an illegal act. If the police never paid attention to misdemeanor laws, what would be the point of them, and where would one draw the line?
doodlecloud 26
While I understand your point of view, it's that kind of attitude which means the small things just get ignored. There's LOADS of dog poop where I live, it's like not a single person bothers to clean up. A lot of litter too. It's supposedly illegal but the police never bother to get involved...I wish they would. Don't have to make it top priority or anything but it'd be nice if they actually did SOMETHING. I'm sure having a nicer looking area would make at least some difference, even if only small or subconscious, to how people treat it in the future as well...you know, local pride and all that...
DocBastard 38
Can I assume your dog is a poo-dle? No? How about a shitsu? Dooberman? Labradoo?
ShyAnn29 14
Labradoo-dle
Spazz420 7
You should've sacrificed a sock!!
PenguinBitch 43
Here, use this thin napkin.
caysters 12
For future reference, they sell little Baggie holders that hook to the leash. That way you'll never be without em again...