Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML
Today, I was at a water park with my family. They wanted me to stand underneath this big bucket filled with water. I didn't know it tips over, and my swimsuit isn't the tightest, so when all the water fell down, my swimsuit bottoms fell to my knees in front of tons of kids. FML
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML
Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML
Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was, "A man running." I didn't even get an apology. FML
Today, my 16-year-old daughter handed me the picture she wants TV reports to use if ever she happens to get kidnapped. FML
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Top comments
shift_love 13
You should have offered them a poison apple or something and plays the part of the haggard villain
wannagofast 3
And they lived happily ever after
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Comments (161)
RiceChrispy03 9
I would've drop kicked all of them.
MrWhiteGluz 1
That's pathedic....
jquiggy89 3
Just like your spelling.
Arrawyn 12
Hey you're not alone, that's happened to me before!
Arrawyn 12
I love that episode!
Arrawyn 12
That's meant to go with another comment
Riley97 0
You live in the Nati??
Frankietodamizza 0
you should watch the end of step brothers, then you could defend yourself if this happens again
arlo1024 0
Rofl this made my day
SanpakuEyes 18
I'm glad I'm not the only one who found this hilarious!
iHateHippiesToo 6
This is what happens when you "swim with the sharks".
KM96 24
Sorry for you OP - I hope you are alright :) Maybe they mistook you for a pinata?
reddudeover 2
There's actually a website that calculates how many 5yr olds you could take on at once I can fight 27... *stares down 5yr old
BunchieRules 31
That website sounds awesome. But what I'm wondering is, did they steal anything? If OP was at Disneyworld they may have brought expensive items, like a camera. Edit: OP didn't say anything about being at Disneyworld. My bad.