Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was woken up to my mother screaming obscenities at me, all because I threw up last night after days of not feeling well, and the flushing of the toilet afterwards woke her up. FML
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling too well and consequently threw up. In an effort to get some sympathy, I told my mom about what happened. Rather than trying to make me feel better, she yelled at me because I threw up in the bathroom sink "when the damn toilet is two feet away." Thanks mom. FML
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
Today, my mother bolted into my room and let out a huge fart that smelled like rotten meat because she wanted to prove a point, that she had been having intestinal problems for three days. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my mom was on the phone when she decided to blurt out that she got me probiotics for my stomach issues. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
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Top comments
T9FTW 20
Welp, now you're both leaking.
Welshite 39
You would think people would know better by now: don't ever accuse a woman being on her period; EVER.
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Comments (179)
caver 12
I'm on the crapper too pal
Pwn17 25
Nobody wanted to know that.
gc327072 30
Still a better comment than "that's a shitty situation"
\ 28
TMI... TMI
mkymouse90 17
what.. baha she got u back.
leothelostboy 5
Better revenge would be to call child protective services on her and laugh while the cops take her away.
Welshite 39
You're the type who makes a mountain out of a molehill, aren't you? You mole molester! I'm gonna call wildlife protective services on you.
starfish7 18
A laxative overdose can be dangerous. It's not just a harmless revenge.
patrickalamo 47
17 you are correct. It is called assault. Verbal provocation alone should not give rise to a physical violence.
Ms_ValS 27
People who think they can laugh at their parents being taken away by child protective services are obviously idiots. It's not a game. Serious consequences are abound.
TheDrifter 23
They're idiots to think it is the parent that gets taken away, leaving them home with their beloved possessions. It's actually the other way around, the child gets carted off to a filthy group home to "save" them from the parent they reported.
kumarina 35
If he is idiot enough to do it, good luck on fostercare
starfish7 18
That is a bit immature for a mother to do to her son.
beautifulsoul89 11
Lmao, gotta love the "come back of the mothers"!!! You said the wrong thing at the wrong time!! Oh revenge is bitter sweet, well now you learned your lesson, right
utrax 23
Damn. My mom can get mad, but not that mad. FYL OP, hope you'll feel better soon.
XPhoenixFire 17
Sounds like a shitty situation. No?ok, ill see myself out
150493x 29
Please do.
kumarina 35
And never come back
mFUNdo21 17
sorry 23, your comment got flushed
misslady23 10
Yup sounds like me on my period lol
Jst4kicks 16
haha awesome mom
fordneagles 34
Guess she's proven you right then... Still voted YDI because you never, EVER say that out loud, especially in front of the woman!