Intimacy, Awkward and Sextoys: Repeat offender

Repeat offender

By Anonymous - 09/06/2022 02:00

Today, I was the only family member available to take my grandad to hospital, after he fell on a bottle in the shower and got it stuck up his ass. Again. I swear we need to start monitoring him in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 156

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Same thing different taste

The future

By omen - 02/09/2020 10:01 - Indonesia - Majalengka

Today, I have to take care of my abusive grandpa. He's smearing poop all over the wall and peeing on the bed again. It's still morning and I'm bracing myself for doing this five times a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 644

You deserved it 125

No, not now!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Estonia - Tartu

Today, in a hardware store, I had to physically restrain my senile grandpa from trying to take a crap in one of the display toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 797

You deserved it 1 044

Bad sherpa

By Sorry grandpa (he's okay) - 05/12/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, while I was at my aunt's house with family, my grandpa needed to use the bathroom, so I guided him to it. There's a short staircase leading to it, and to my horror, he tumbled down it. I forgot he's going blind due to glaucoma and therefore couldn't see the steps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 457

By lvegadelgado_6 - 10/08/2015 14:32 - United States - Deerfield

Today, while I was doing my hair, my grandpa walked in, dropped his pants, and started taking a crap in the toilet right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 556

You deserved it 2 141

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Dekalb

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 095

You deserved it 3 061

By therewasnocurtain - 06/04/2015 20:07 - United States - Lewiston

Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 122

You deserved it 2 543

Bunged up

By Anonymous - 24/04/2021 02:00

Today, as caregiver, I had to physically remove the shit my grandpa had stuck in his rectum, because he doesn't remember how to shit. He barely knows who I am, which is good because when he remembers who he is, he becomes an abusive asshole. I'm 27. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 181

You deserved it 89

Earplugs, stat!

By Anonymous - 14/06/2021 06:00

Today, my grandpa forgot that my aunt set up a baby monitor in his bedroom in case of a fall. I’m sitting in the living room with his wife - who is deaf - and I hear him moaning over the baby monitor. My grandfather was jerking off and forgot that someone could hear him. I wish I could forget too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 672

You deserved it 140

By MyS3lf - 19/04/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I woke up to a strange sound that sounded like a lot of water being poured into a sink. It was actually my father in law using the bathtub as a toilet. He's staying with us, and is showing no signs of leaving any time soon. He thinks this is acceptable behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 127

You deserved it 3 331

By Anonymous - 06/05/2013 08:35 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 692

You deserved it 6 604

Nikki 17

Thursday 9 June 2022 2:26

Or tell him to use objects that won’t get stuck, and come up with a better excuse, emergency nurses and doctors have heard that one too many times before

DevoutOccamist 12

Thursday 9 June 2022 4:06

"fell"

Comments

Nikki 17

Thursday 9 June 2022 2:26

Or tell him to use objects that won’t get stuck, and come up with a better excuse, emergency nurses and doctors have heard that one too many times before

MidnaLink 33

Thursday 9 June 2022 3:31

I don't think you WANT to be monitoring that.

DevoutOccamist 12

Thursday 9 June 2022 4:06

"fell"

creepingjennie 13

Thursday 9 June 2022 4:21

So just so you know, nothing accidentally gets stuck there. It's always on purpose.

Nikki 17

Thursday 9 June 2022 4:39

Nothing accidentally goes up there, it’s almost always a mistake that it gets stuck

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 9 June 2022 5:03

See the Seinfeld episode about the Assman. "Million-to-one shot, Doc. Million-to-one."

SirEnigM0nk 22

Friday 1 July 2022 20:39

Are you sure we want to encourage grandpa to get a Fusili Jerry?

IHaveThePower 16

Thursday 9 June 2022 6:19

You might just leave a sex toy catalog in the bathroom and not comment on it--improvised sex toys cause that sort of problem when used anally. They design anal toys that don't get stuck.

legalgravethief 8

Thursday 9 June 2022 9:16

I can’t tell if if this post is serious or you really are that innocent/naive, but if you are, he didn’t “ accidentally fall “ he needs Flared based sex toys so they don’t get “lost” and require major surgery to remove. Bless haha