Repeat offender

By Anonymous - 09/06/2022 02:00

Spicy
Today, I was the only family member available to take my grandad to hospital, after he fell on a bottle in the shower and got it stuck up his ass. Again. I swear we need to start monitoring him in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 215
You deserved it 155

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Nikki 17

Or tell him to use objects that won’t get stuck, and come up with a better excuse, emergency nurses and doctors have heard that one too many times before

Comments

Nikki 17

Or tell him to use objects that won’t get stuck, and come up with a better excuse, emergency nurses and doctors have heard that one too many times before

I don't think you WANT to be monitoring that.

So just so you know, nothing accidentally gets stuck there. It's always on purpose.

Nikki 17

Nothing accidentally goes up there, it’s almost always a mistake that it gets stuck

See the Seinfeld episode about the Assman. "Million-to-one shot, Doc. Million-to-one."

Are you sure we want to encourage grandpa to get a Fusili Jerry?

You might just leave a sex toy catalog in the bathroom and not comment on it--improvised sex toys cause that sort of problem when used anally. They design anal toys that don't get stuck.

I can’t tell if if this post is serious or you really are that innocent/naive, but if you are, he didn’t “ accidentally fall “ he needs Flared based sex toys so they don’t get “lost” and require major surgery to remove. Bless haha

Jesus just buy the man a butt plug so he can't accidentally fall on the shampoo bottle anymore.

Buy him a big *****! Leave it unattended in his bedroom with no note, and nobody say anything.