Health, Accident, Pranks and Injury: Pranks are terrible

Pranks are terrible

By Anonymous - 05/08/2021 23:01 - United States - Humble

Today, my sister threw my water bottle as a joke. When I stepped off the bleachers, my right foot lost its footing and my other foot followed. Now I have two sprained ankles at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 652

You deserved it 63

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Same thing different taste

By wintersoldier - 14/07/2015 02:36 - Austria

Today, while trying to comfort my little brother who just injured his leg, I tripped and sprained my ankle. At least he was amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 053

You deserved it 2 367

By dannyfanny - 28/08/2009 20:59 - United States

Today, I slipped walking down the stairs. My mom thought I sprained my right ankle. In her haste to get me to the doctor, she grabbed me and accidentally tripped me. I broke my left ankle. The right one was fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 771

You deserved it 2 609

By CC - 02/09/2012 06:27 - United States - Southfield

Today, I was icing an injured foot with a frozen water bottle as the doctor directed me. When I was done, I picked the bottle up and immediately dropped it on the same injured foot, which is now swollen and bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 773

You deserved it 4 759

Smashing awakening

By charapos - 06/02/2022 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by slamming my ankle into a glass bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 220

Protect the child at all cost

By Anonymous - 26/12/2022 03:00

Today, carrying my 10-month old niece down the stairs, I missed a step. Protecting her on the way down, I badly sprained my right foot and snapped the ligament in my left. I now can’t walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 139

By "Audrey Harmon" - 20/04/2017 16:00

Today, my sister tackled me by the leg in a game of frisbee. I now know the unique sensation of a knee dislocating. It is not a beautiful one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 410

You deserved it 275

By scaredofcutouts - 10/10/2012 21:44 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 994

You deserved it 2 325

By Slipperywhenwet - 20/01/2017 10:00

Today, I tripped over a "Caution: Slippery When Wet" floor sign and sprained my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 503

You deserved it 2 004

Ringing those bells

By Anonymous - 24/08/2022 04:00

Today, I was at the water slide with my two sisters. As we got to the top, my sister wanted me to go first. As soon as I went to go down the slide, she lamped me right in the balls from behind, and pushed me down the slide. My other sister kneed me in the same spot 5 minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 965

You deserved it 114

By DaycareMama92 - 28/04/2017 16:00

Today, I fractured a bone in my foot by dropping a shampoo bottle on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 273

You deserved it 413

RichardPencil 30

Friday 6 August 2021 6:39

What a great joke! You tell people who go on stage to break a leg, but they don't mean it literally.

EBrogen 12

Friday 6 August 2021 9:18

Am I the only one that wants a video of this person trying to walk?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Friday 6 August 2021 6:39

What a great joke! You tell people who go on stage to break a leg, but they don't mean it literally.

EBrogen 12

Friday 6 August 2021 9:18

Am I the only one that wants a video of this person trying to walk?

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The Top

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 153

You deserved it 68 065

Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 753

You deserved it 3 574

The Top

Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 553

You deserved it 3 191

Today, I finally managed to get my electrician boyfriend to agree to replace our old lights, after a year of asking. Saturday, he couldn't be bothered and Sunday he came down with a mysterious man flu. This is about the 10th time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 732

You deserved it 342

Today, after years of impotence, I woke up with a raging boner. I was so happy until I remembered my wife divorced me last year because of my impotence. This depressed me so much that I couldn’t muster the enthusiasm to masturbate, and the boner went bye bye, never to return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 111

Today, I didn't realise that after leaving my ex for someone else that I would need to be a therapist for all of his friends. He was such a garbage human being that he not only drove his friends away, but they all contacted me because I was the only one who "truly understood" how self-absorbed he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 826

You deserved it 145

Today, I visited a friend and her new baby. The baby had a tight constrictive headband and a clearly wet cloth nappy on. I tried to give some friendly advice on why this was bad, but she shot me down, saying what would I know, I don't have a kid. She's 17 and I'm a 26-year-old practicing midwife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 858

You deserved it 165

Today, my boss fired me because he wants to start dating my mother and apparently doesn't want it to be "awkward." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 212

You deserved it 1 901