Today, I threw a party while my parents were gone. I forgot that our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so when people opened the door, it went off. I couldn't find the number for the alarm company, so the cops showed up. Everyone started cheering because they thought they were strippers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML
Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house, despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML
Today, I accidentally set off an alarm at the school I work for. No one was there, I didn't have the code or password the company needed, my boss wouldn't answer his phone, three policemen interrogated me and asked for ID, but realized I left home without my wallet. There was nothing I could do. I cried. FML
Today, I found out that my parents changed the code on our alarm system while they were out of town. The police could not verify I was their son, despite spending hours trying to get hold of them. They thought it was just another telemarketer. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML
Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML
Today, I was throwing a surprise birthday party for my friend. As we all hid in the dark waiting for him to arrive, I unexpectedly sneezed so loudly that I scared everyone, and they jumped out before he had even finished unlocking the front door. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I was heading back to my apartment and I heard noises behind the front door. Assuming it was the surprise party I'd hinted at, I flicked on the lights… as two heavy guys pushed past me. I was robbed. FML
Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML
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Top comments
NGM_47 0
Yeah...cause strippers show up in cop cars -_- Your friends must have been really drunk not to know that.
caancoha 0
Strippers that show up in cars with strobe lights? DAMN! YOU MUSTA PUT IN EXTRA!
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Comments (78)
stryder 1
YDI for not getting real strippers.
divineinstrument 2
Kinda reminds me of an episode of the Simpsons... except that Chief Wiggum actually ended up stripping *yeuch*
xmaddy 0
haha sorry that sucks
streetmember 0
haha no FML that's amazing! :)
shyguy_fml 0
That's really funny!
loverslanex3 0
How do you not know the code to turn of the alarm in your own house? And #19, yes they do, so does mine.
oliveolive_fml 0
HAHAHAHAHA i bet everyone was like "hellzzzz yeaaaaa rip your shirt off!" lmfaooooo that is a win! no fail with some official handcuff officers ready to cuff you lol
rayrayy_fml 0
...Was this like...English? I have NO idea what you just said. Worst troll EVER.
Tokie_fml 0
@ 19&20 they probably did call... just the number they had on file was his parents cell phone
BioProject 0
#21... W T F ? I know they say going back to school is difficult when you leave, but the 5th grade really is not that bad.
timtam24 0
YES IT IS!!!!!