Today, my parents got a new dog. It attacks me every time I laugh. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, my school brought in therapy dogs to help with stress. I was attacked by one of them. FML
Today, I started petting my cousin's Doberman. Now, whenever I stop he growls menacingly. FML
Today, my dog carried on with his recent habit of trying to hump me. When I told my mom, she just joked that he's my new boyfriend. Now my whole family is just calling him my boyfriend. FML
Today, I thought I was seeing double. My neighbours got a new dog, which is exactly the same as the other one, except that it hates me twice as much. FML
Today, my boyfriend's vicious dog, which he got as a security measure and growls and barks at me whenever I go near it, was caught on our security camera playing like a puppy with a burglar, while the other two burglars cleaned out all our valuables. FML
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Today, I laughed at my grandma's chihuahua poodle mix, as it barked at me entering the house. "What are you going to do, nibble me to death?" is apparently enough to make it jump and bite me. I needed five stitches. FML
Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML
Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML
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Top comments
FortuneCookie3 1
attack it every time it barks
ICATiger 13
Guess it's the dog who gets the last laugh...
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Comments (83)
SamLiveFree_77 9
74- Do you take everything so literal? -.-
raphanne_fml 33
I think it was meant as a joke...
lostredneck 2
Beat the shit out of it. They should beat the shit out of it too. Ur a person and it's a dog. I have 3 and they would never get away with something like that.
Savra_fml 17
Sounds like someone should beat the shit out of you. 'tard.
crammer1 6
I agree..beating a dog for simple misbehaving shouldn't ever be done, but any time a dog shows agression it needs to be taught that this is UNACCEPTABLE and a simple "no no" won't do. This is for it's own safety as well as yours. It must learn a verrry negative consequence to this behavior which is shock collars or physical punishment or else you'll be putting the dog down when it attacks someone outside the family.
fadingfaith 4
**** you.
SiriusBlack97 17
I guess it gets the last laugh
soulofnature 8
I might sound like I'm taking this too seriously, but I would get the dog to a professional trainer asap. Situations like that need to be corrected immediately or it will just get worse. I know someone who had a very food aggressive dog and never tried to correct it, then surprise, surprise...the behavior just got worse. It bit several people and was taken away by the state. She got it back but with the understanding that if it happened again, the dog would be destroyed. Anyway, hope you get it figured out.
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
Got owned by a dog. (;
KiddNYC1O 22
Get a muzzle. For yourself.
DeadxManxWalking 27
Already said bro #10
KiddNYC1O 22
Touché.
Yeskah 0
Maybe your laugh is annoying.
Fishfanatic 7
When we laugh ( well when most people laugh) we open our mouths and in most people's cases bare our teeth and make a fairly loud noise . Unless they've had a stroke or something. What the dog sees is you opening your mouth, baring your teeth and making a noise. When other dogs or animals growl or threaten, they open their mouths, bare their teeth ( if they have them) , and make a noise. I'm sure you can see the correlation there. The dog basically thinks you are being threatening. I would agree that getting the dog professional help is the best course of action. Otherwise if nothing else no one will be able to laugh safely in it's presence, and at worst it could attack someone. If the dog was a rescue there is no knowing what sort of past it's had, or what sort of experiences. Not even the best shelter can find out everything and fix it, espescially since a behavioural problem could have a specific trigger that the shelter or centre hasn't tried or thought of past the common ones such as food agression , reaction to smaller dogs/animals/children ect.
Chantalle Hensgens-Waltmans 19
Thank you! I was reading the comments to see if anyone had some common sense about this 😅
Brikan 0
I hate dogs...
mztiffany 0
Omg terrible but too funny!!