Relatable, Awkward and Love: Nice imagery

Nice imagery

By nekogirl15 - 27/10/2011 01:38 - United States

Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 326

You deserved it 3 829

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Silver linings

By 10 years, 0 dates - 28/11/2020 11:03

Today, I wanted to ask out this cute girl I used to work with. Before I could, she said she likes my only friend there, and asked if could I set them up. Trying to be nice guy and good friend, I did. Then she made her complete lack of interest in me obvious. But hey, at least the gay guy she hung out with thought I was cute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 827

You deserved it 140

Proselytism

By Anonymous - 08/12/2023 16:00 - Brazil - São Paulo

Today, after many days of glances, smiles, and small talk, I tried to kiss a man from my gym in the parking lot. He dodged and asked why. I said I thought it was what he wanted, given his apparent interest. He said that he's only like that because he does missionary work, and wanted to become a friend. I'm a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 759

By ShouldHaveDoneItMyself - 05/07/2016 17:04 - Sudan

Today, I didn't have the courage to tell the guy who likes me that I only thought of him as a friend, so I asked my best friend to do it for me. It turns out that her way of doing this is telling him to "Fuck off" and then punching him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 121

You deserved it 12 396

Take the L

By Anonymous - 06/07/2020 17:02

Today, I confessed my feelings to my best friend, how I'm deeply in love with him. The consequence wasn't good, as he told me we should never talk to each other again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 676

You deserved it 216

Rom-com

By Anonymous - 15/10/2020 11:02

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my best friend who I'm crushing hard on that I like her. She gave me a look of revulsion and asked if I was joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 145

By alone_forever - 04/03/2009 21:03 - United States

Today, my best friend who I have been secretly in love with forever, was ranting about her ex-girlfriend. Then she said : "If only you were gay, we'd be perfect for each other." So I took the chance to tell her I was. She responded : "Well I am still not attracted to you though." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 926

You deserved it 7 865

By Anonymous - 19/07/2015 18:02 - United States - Greensburg

Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 201

You deserved it 2 745

By Anonymous - 03/02/2015 18:23 - United States - Cheyenne

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 271

You deserved it 2 907

Classic move

By qyx3lmnop24 - 20/12/2014 07:33 - United States - Napa

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 413

You deserved it 5 074

By Anonymous - 03/12/2010 21:18 - Argentina

Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 588

You deserved it 3 294

FMLandurstoo 9

Thursday 27 October 2011 5:59

I get that all of the time

krad204 21

Thursday 27 October 2011 5:58

That's harsh...

Comments

SquashedSpider7 0

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:01

#6 yes, yes it is

Zeronos 0

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:01

That means you're too sexy for him. you go gurrrrrrl. I'd romance. ;)

tylersign 11

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:02

Might wanna start putting on your makeup with your eyes OPEN. ;)

Rinat_fml 26

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:02

Use lots of make up, like Jenna Marbles!

False_Stupidity 41

Friday 28 October 2011 12:32

Maybe she already uses too much makeup and looks like a corpse, perhaps that's what her crush was getting at?

taytoc 10

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:02

Necropheliaaaaa

youcunthole 0

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:03

Sounds like somebody needs to hit up mickeyDs more often

IKickPuppiesHard 16

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:03

You shoulda just talked to him yourself. Give it 2 weeks and your friend is gonna be doing him.

HoboSmeller 6

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:04

To, Op, I would like to confirm that :)

bjr1208 3

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:07

He would know...

DragonGirl1031 11

Thursday 27 October 2011 6:07

That's horrible.

Keywords

Health Lonely Dentist Sadness Awkward Abuse Work Miscellaneous Birthday Parents OCD Mental health Relatable Love Housework Cute Cleaning Argument Kids Animals Cats Underwear Intimacy Bikes Camping Friends Vacation Boredom Annoying Transportation

The Top

Today, I decided to treat myself to a relaxing bubble bath. Mid-soak, I heard a loud crash and realized my cat had knocked over a shelf, sending shampoo bottles and bath salts tumbling into the water. Now I'm stuck cleaning up a soapy mess instead of enjoying my spa time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 118

Today, I was eating ice cream and struggling to chew a particularly hard chunk of chocolate. After finally breaking it into pieces, I spat it out because it tasted terrible. Then I discovered that I was missing my temporary crown. Now I have no upper molar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 196

You deserved it 6 415

The Top

Today, I found out that when they put "Take with food" on the side of antibiotics, what they really mean is "Take with food because this stuff is gonna liquefy everything in your G.I. tract, and make you have to run out of the middle of calculus for the worst diarrhea ever." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 316

You deserved it 10 967

Today, I woke up with a migrane, so I took one of my prescription migrane pills to get me through my day. The pill made me dizzy and nauseous, so I took a motion-sickness pill. That pill gave me a migrane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 923

You deserved it 5 472

Today, I realized I sent over 2 dozen job applications with my dating profile word doc instead of my resume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 517

You deserved it 3 620

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and said I was not 'Christian enough' for her. Later I found out she had been cheating on me with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 617

You deserved it 2 543

Today, I ate something really sticky so I had to wash my hands and mouth. I saw a tea towel on the bench so I was wiped myself with that. Then I noticed it smelt really bad. I had just cleaned my face with turps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 949

You deserved it 10 350

Today, my boyfriend has severe dog phobia, and a dog off its lead ran up to him in a car park. He panicked and tried to jump into the car, but the door hit it in the head and it started fitting and seizing. About three people called the police and the dog's owner broke our car window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 254

Nice imagery

Same thing different taste

Silver linings

Proselytism

Take the L

Rom-com

Classic move

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