Intimacy and Love: Meat

Meat

By tomedicalforlove - 21/02/2013 05:51

Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 130

You deserved it 41 953

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Same thing different taste

Buzzing the tower

By Princess ? - 12/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 142

You deserved it 280

By Ew?Really? - 04/08/2014 05:42 - United States - Montrose

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 087

You deserved it 4 985

Classic Dave

By Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 391

By Mrs. Ned - 09/09/2015 02:00 - United States - Incline Village

Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 900

You deserved it 3 081

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 06:40 - United States

Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 459

You deserved it 4 927

By Anonymous - 19/04/2013 18:28 - United States

Today, my husband tried to haggle a blowjob out of me in exchange for taking his first shower in nearly two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 480

You deserved it 7 369

Contempt

By Anonymous - 26/08/2014 21:46 - Bosnia and Herzegovina - Tuzla

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 730

You deserved it 6 667

The good old days

By WOWreally - 25/09/2009 06:24 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my husband in the shower. I got in and we were talking and goofing around and I stuck out my chest and sucked in my stomach being stupid, and my husband said, "Wait! Do it again! That's how you looked when I first met you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 033

You deserved it 12 108

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 065

You deserved it 50 978

By UncleMonkey - 06/03/2015 06:18 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 580

You deserved it 45 196

teriyakioxo 4

Thursday 21 February 2013 12:38

What have you done to our elderly? D:

DocBastard 38

Thursday 21 February 2013 12:48

Maybe the fact that you call it "man meat" like a pubescent teenager is what turned him off.

Comments

EvilUndead 9

Thursday 21 February 2013 17:31

You deserve it for ruining somebody's fantasy.

firefly319 7

Thursday 21 February 2013 17:42

I'm stuck on man meat... Ew.

2035 9

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:00

Nursing home....

protectyournuts 5

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:14

Why... Just why?

Dmleonard 5

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:20

You ******* deserve this freak

vbmg152 18

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:26

Okay!?! You so deserve it!

Ziggy122 15

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:27

Just... No. Why would you bring up nursing homes while you're fooling around? That's like, at the top of the list of ways to kill the mood.

iAlissa 34

Thursday 21 February 2013 18:51

What are you doing at work...?

Goumbush 4

Thursday 21 February 2013 20:16

Why the **** would you show him how to wash an old mans dick?

Locoluis 15

Thursday 21 February 2013 21:05

What part of "intimacy" is so hard to understand for you? What you do with your husband, you don't do it with anyone else. YDI for treating him like yet another one of your patients.