Sex Intimacy Likely story - FML

Likely story

Gabriela - 23/11/2011 01:00

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

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Sneaky

crazy_bitch122 - 29/06/2011 05:13 - United States

Today, while we were making love, he farted, then blamed it on his dog, who wasn't even in the room. The smell alone could have killed me. FML

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Rush of gas

Fart queen - 05/12/2022 04:00

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML

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First time?

Anonymous - 31/07/2021 23:01 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my long-term boyfriend and I went on a romantic getaway. In the hotel we were having great sex, I was so close to… and then he farted. FML

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byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

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Haley. - 26/03/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

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Fetish

Anonymous - 25/07/2019 12:00

Today, my boyfriend and I finally had sex. The entire time he kept begging me to fart, especially on him. FML

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Blame the pooch

anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

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Anonymous - 11/09/2012 19:16 - Sweden - Guayanilla

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

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fatti11 - 14/01/2017 18:00

Today, during an argument that he couldn't win, my boyfriend farted in a glass, covered it with his hand, ran to me, and let it go it right in front of my nose. FML

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Anonymous - 14/12/2018 14:00

Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML

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chelseaheming 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 8:29

Damn frogs are EVERYWHERE!

bensharp 5

Wednesday 23 November 2011 8:25

I'm assuming you were outside?

ambino95 3

Wednesday 23 November 2011 15:58

umm where was this nearby frog?

ohno0421 1

Wednesday 23 November 2011 16:36

My boyfriend says that all the damn time lol

fire_pixi_180 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 17:02

my fiance does the same thing only he says it's a california barking spider lol

perdix 29

Wednesday 23 November 2011 17:08

Wouldn't your sex have gone better if you accepted that the fart sound was really the croak of a nearby frog? Cynicism interferes with sexual pleasure. When a girl told me that it was her first time to **** on a first date, I was smart enough not to question her. I'd pretend to be flattered and pray I didn't get an STD;)

AnnaBonJovi 9

Wednesday 23 November 2011 18:13

doesn't matter had sex!

NPN_Scorpio 16

Wednesday 23 November 2011 18:23

Solution: butt plugs, ear plugs and nose plugs.

CamberwellCarrot 8

Wednesday 23 November 2011 18:45

That's a super funny excuse. YDI for being upset.

cheerluv15 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 19:30

Y blame it on a frog

mama8809 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 21:36

Lmfao that's funny as hell

mama8809 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 21:36

Lmfao that's funny as hell

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

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Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML

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Today, I was shopping for rings with my fiancée. We spent over two hours selecting the perfect ring and diamond to match. When filling out the paperwork I discovered I left my wallet at home. She had to pay the 20% down payment for the ring. FML

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Today, I love eating cherry tomatoes. I was eating them last week, and left some on the counter. Yesterday, I ate two from the box again. It was rotten and sour. I didn't think or spit it out. Now I have severe stomach ache that I can't move. Why am I like this? FML

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Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML

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Today, I realized I’ve become an old woman. I have dentures, wear bifocal glasses, have rheumatoid arthritis, carry a stash of candy in my purse, and got excited when I bought a new potato peeler. I’m only 29, but I’m an old woman. FML

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