Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML
Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
Today, I found out my husband put a parental block on the TV so I couldn't rent a movie. I'm 42. FML
Today, my daughter is so out of touch with anything not related to her phone and her social popularity that she doesn't know who Hitler was. I had to show her on YouTube, and while we aren't religious anymore, we are a Jewish family so this is an extra level of parental shame for me. FML
Today, while babysitting a five year-old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML
Today, I got called into the school by my daughter's teacher. Apparently my daughter informed her class that over the weekend she spent her time with her daddy watching porn stars while her mummy was at work. It took a long time to convince her they were actually watching a TV show called "Pawn Stars". FML
Today, my husband, who is in the Navy, had a couple of his sailor friends over to hang out. The stereotype about their swearing is true. My two year old now won't stop saying "Fuck." FML
Today, I found out my ex lets our kids watch Game of Thrones during his weekend visits. Our kids are 8 and 6. FML
Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML
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Top comments
d4m4s74 12
Hey, it's a nice story to tell his friends when he's older.
Typicall 21
Well isn't that cute ...
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Comments (84)
Lv2drum930 1
it happens, when i was 4 my teacher asked me what kind of dog i have and i replied "i have a f*cking dog" because i heard my dad say "You F*cking Dog!" so many times... you end up just laughing about it when they are older, at least i did..
Shepardspie71 8
Who cares if it was Netflix, hula or amazon. He son is now saying anti semetic things. That's serious. Have u all missed the point ??????
larrystephen 1
Please explain to me how saying 'heil hitler' is anti-semetic in any way...
iwadasn 33
58, you're kidding, right?
AlonMower 9
Parenting at its best
worldclassrager 41
I don't think that will happen again...as in watching the phrase well sorry about that one...
Risho96 10
I know I shouldn't, but I laughed.
Martnikk 15
It's like he is not going to learn it sooner or later
TecheyTim 14
If your 4 year-old is capable of remembering and quoting a sentence of that complexity...he should be in 3rd grade, not preschool.
mFUNdo21 17
no he shouldn't. he's 4. children are quite impressionable at that age and will repeat just about anything that gets a reaction from others
Kween_Skiddlez 6
I would have slap my husband,if that happen
stitesy29 18
Heh
JesseAttack 21
That's pretty intense!