By Anonymous

Johnny Weissmuller over here

Today, I was walking in the woods with the girl I like when I saw a vine overhanging a small creek. Trying to make her laugh, I took off my shirt and started swinging on the vine like Tarzan. The vine snapped and I fell into the creek. Guess who's missing half the skin on his back? FML
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  Marcella1016  |  31

Including losing half the skin on his back? OP probably imagined a scenario with him and the girl where he ended up losing some skin on his back...but not like this.