Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About halfway through, I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML
Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML
Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML
Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML
Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML
Today, while nailing a board down, I hit my thumb with the hammer. As I reached to console my throbbing finger, I dropped the hammer on my foot. When I went down to hold my foot, I smacked my head on the board. Now I've got a concussion, a smashed finger, and a bruised foot. FML
Today, I was changing the garbage at a local fast food place where I work. Being a rather short guy, I had to lean back and fling the full, heavy bag at the top. I did so with such force that my head hit the dumpster, knocking me out. FML
Today, the lights went out at the gym while I was holding a heavy bar. I tried to put it back on the rack, missed, and dropped it on my toe. Then, as I was limping around in pain, I hit my head on one of the other bars on a rack at head height. FML
Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML
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Top comments
Poonheart 0
That must have shattered your shin... -.-
justxmyxluck 0
I'm cringing just reading this. Well at least you didn't hit your crotch. That would just about kill you. =/
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Comments (256)
DangerousBabee 0
Halleluja! Praise the Lord!! :D
Petethegreat36 0
praise jesus!
RuralNinja 0
How do you manage that? No offense, but I didn't even realize it was possible to do that.
mattmag 0
Lol, sounds like god was particularly fond of that picnic table.
stop_whining 0
Sorry to hear that... the shins are extremely painful. Did you break anything, or just have a purple welt the size of a tennis ball?
fudgemeister 0
#62, you're retarded. At least the guy is trying to be a good person and doing what he believes is right. You can't fault a person for that. I bet he's done a lot more to help society, whatever he believes, than you have lately.
itsnikk10 0
I'd cry for you if I saw that. Oww
smellyjelly 0
OUCH. dude. that must have hurt, but hey it could have been worse, like you swinging and hitting your pastor in the nuts? get well soon haha
tukker 0
ouch, too bad man.
grnddragn32 0
if we're talking full 8 pound or more sledge, its not possible to hit yourself in the shin, seeing as you'd have almost an 8 foot range with that. that means you were using it way wrong, so all the people that say he shattered his shin, thats not very likely. he probably did the equivalent to dropping it on his toe. it doesn't take much to break concrete with a sledge, hence why he got halfway through despite doing it totally wrong