Alcohol, Dating and Miscellaneous: Impressive!

Impressive!

By ol faithful - 03/09/2011 09:24 - Canada

Today, I was at the bar with a date. My date made a joke about me being a slow drinker, so I tried to impress her by chugging the rest of my glass. She was impressed with how fast I chugged my beer, until it came back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 909

You deserved it 41 891

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Same thing different taste

By sandyhome - 11/04/2011 15:20 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a girl. We drove separately and met at the restaurant. Over the course of two hours she drank a gallon and a half of beer, then her boyfriend picked her up because she was too drunk to drive home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 763

You deserved it 6 272

Maturity level

By Clairebear - 07/05/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 720

By OMFG I LOVE MLP - 24/08/2012 21:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, my friends set me up on a blind date. I thought it went well, and while saying our goodbyes, I leaned in to give her a kiss. She pulled way, laughed, "I'm not drunk enough for that," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 928

You deserved it 3 792

By Isitreallythatbad, - 22/12/2013 05:37 - United States

Today, I went to a local bar for a speed dating event. The first person I hooked up with took one look at my face, burst into laughter, and walked out of the bar practically doubling over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 527

You deserved it 3 647

By Chaznuts - 08/09/2009 06:22 - Australia

Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 535

You deserved it 5 202

By Anonymous - 19/08/2009 22:31 - Canada

Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 105

You deserved it 4 706

By Bliss - 09/02/2009 18:24 - United States

Today, I gave my drink to a girl who I got with previously and started to dance with her. She backed off after a few seconds, took my drink and danced with my friend who was standing right next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 008

You deserved it 5 905

By darn it. - 20/02/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 042

You deserved it 4 156

By Noah - 16/08/2016 18:43 - United States - South Haven

Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 728

You deserved it 2 903

By Anonymous - 19/07/2012 04:55 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 851

You deserved it 80 945

optimusprime0069 8

Saturday 3 September 2011 19:57

Did it taste better the second time?

Sunny_Eclipse 6

Saturday 3 September 2011 19:58

Who cares about what the date says, OP? To impress her, be yourself. But, yeah, you do sorta deserve it.

Comments

DaFudge 6

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:36

Yum.

bigguy123456 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:37

Im sure it was so impressive that she slept with you afterwards:)

OfficeNinja 5

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:41

next time do the keg stand! skanks worldwide find that hot...

IAm1AwesomeChick 7

Sunday 4 September 2011 4:47

I was at a party back when I was in high school and my buddy did a keg stand. This airhead ran up to him and seriously told him that it was sexy. she put out for him that night. You were probably joking in your comment but some girls really are that dumb.

naddification 7

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:43

Drink slow, get made fun of. Drink fast, puke fest. Doesn't look good for you either way.

ajlee_fml 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:49

two beers for the price of one.

allinicolesmh 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:50

Learn to hold your alcohol, be a big boy.(:

kouklistax3 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:55

You deserve it for throwing up after chugging a beer. Who throws up from I'm assuming one beer.

emmakkate 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 20:59

HA!!

captainbj2 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 21:00

If that is what it takes to impress her, move on....she is definitely not a keeper...

SteelCladAngel 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 21:09

Thank you! You're one of the few people go are sensible commenting on this fml

awkward_turtles 1

Saturday 3 September 2011 23:53

The girl just made a joke. OP was the one who thought it would impress her.

a_nutritionist 10

Sunday 4 September 2011 5:20

...joking about someone being a slow drinker =/= I CHALLENGE YOU TO FINISH THAT IMMEDIATELY im a slow drinker and eater, when people make jokes about it i dont then force everything down like a complete idiot.