Animals and Work: I'm not getting paid enough for this shit - FML

I'm not getting paid enough for this shit

By Username - 20/10/2010 18:08 - France

Today, at work, my boss made me spend a hour trying to catch a baby raccoon in the parking lot. I'm a bank teller. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 645

You deserved it 3 486

Animals Work

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By shaviTuT - 07/02/2013 19:44 - Malaysia - Bandar Penggaram

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 435

You deserved it 2 666

By anonymous - 13/09/2012 06:02 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I found an enormous raccoon in my backyard. After a couple of nasty scratches, I finally managed to capture the filthy animal. After calling animal control to relocate it, I waited for hours to learn that "relocating" actually means releasing it into my front yard 10 feet away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 774

You deserved it 4 642

By Anonymous - 06/07/2012 02:13 - United States

Today, I was called into my first day of work as a cashier. Not even 30 minutes into training, my boss had already "accidentally" touched my ass 7 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 261

You deserved it 2 716

By idiot - 09/07/2012 21:26 - United States

Today, I was sitting in my car waiting my shift to start. I must've fallen asleep because I woke up to a call from my boss firing me. I was in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 072

You deserved it 23 517

By Andrew - 29/06/2009 10:31 - Canada

Today, there was a meeting at work. I had to give a presentation to my boss and the other attendants. My first subject was on how my 5 year old son got to my briefcase and replaced the contents of it with crayons and a stuffed teddy bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 058

You deserved it 5 443

The Rainbow Bridge

By fishyrael - 30/10/2019 20:00

Today, at my job at a pet store, my boss told me to go outside and hand out flyers. I saw a man sitting on a bench and walked up, saying, "Hi! Do you have a pet?" He teared up and said, "I just put her down this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 226

You deserved it 178

By Ilovelife07 - 14/01/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 730

You deserved it 46 503

The bird

By Mariah Barnes - 24/07/2020 08:01

Today, I saved a baby bird from the site I work on. It was the runt and did not have any feathers and was neglected by the mother. I took care of it all day at work and planned on taking it to a wildlife reserve after work. Two minutes away from the reserve, we hit a pothole and I dropped it. It died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 737

You deserved it 233

FREAKOUT!

By peachesthepigeon - 19/01/2011 18:54 - United States

Today, at work, I helped out an employee who was having trouble. I even bought her a bottle of water. After the production manager decided to fire her on the spot, she went out in the parking lot and broke into several cars, including mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 172

You deserved it 2 668

By Anonymous - 18/09/2010 06:31 - United States

Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 434

You deserved it 2 926

Next

Top comments

krushr 3

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:04

Maybe he thought it was a bank robber?

w2z1 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

It was wearing a mask!

Comments

krushr 3

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:04

Maybe he thought it was a bank robber?

Bobby64 29

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:05

Sly Cooper, maybe?

Unconfined_ 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 0:59

^win (:

RyGan 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:03

YDI for being a bank teller . What IS a bank teller?

zakkyzebra 11

Thursday 21 October 2010 3:55

haha funner than your job I bet. yes I'm aware it is more fun. don't grammar rape me

SarahPicc 3

Thursday 21 October 2010 4:02

dude!! that was freakin hilarious! :) mmd.

TheOtherNewest1 6

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:23

*Haha, more fun than your job I bet, and yes I am aware that it is 'more fun.' Please don't grammar rape me. ^ Consider yourself grammar raped.

iwuvwolfz 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:50

lol 39, you just got grammar raped by 47 xD Thought you were smart, amirite?

nathan5 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 19:04

why not just write more fun instead of correcting yourself and sounding stupider? (yes i am aware that its stupid, please dont grammar rape me)

melanie177 1

Monday 10 January 2011 22:19

Well... baby racoons are cutee sooo..

AntoshaChekhonte 6

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:05

Eh, been there, done that. I've chased animals all over the place for various jobs. It's a matter of public health for us and safety for the animal. Would you rather the little bastard got hit by a car? That's not very nice of you.

underaegis 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 7:17

actually I'd rather my boss get hit; the racoon as well

iSitt 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 11:11

I'd rather none of you get rabies

w2z1 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

It was wearing a mask!

brookeec 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:06

I bet it was something different. Atleast you'll go home today with a funny story? :)

aussie_gemini 5

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:07

hahaha tough!

substitutes 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:11

Don't let it die! Save the cute critter

tigercoon 12

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:12

Aww! He probably thought he was going to steal from the bank :p Well, I hope you didn't harm it, if you ever did catch it xD But FYL for having to chase it :s

skorned 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:13

Well duh! Didn't your actual job become redundant about the same time ATMs were introduced?!

pennguitarist14 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:23

An ATM machine won't allow you to withdraw a $1000 or more.

MissErikaHart 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 0:11

Vegas ATMs let u pull out $5000... (in the casinos) Vegas ftw

underpaid011 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:15

I would rather catch a raccoon than wait on asshole bank customers. ever hear a raccoon complain??

xStiina 0

Wednesday 20 October 2010 23:16

Fun, at least you didn't have to sit around..

Keywords

Miscellaneous Work Annoying Health Relatable Ableism Awkward Love Vacation Healthy Lifestyle Cute Tinder Money Embarrassing Dogs Poopoo peepee Cats Stressed out Mental health ADHD Gross Parenting Kids Anger issues Funerals Family Drugs Roommate Lonely Weird

The Top

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 959

You deserved it 62 428

Today, I found out why my husband faked being sick on Thanksgiving. He was invited to Thanksgiving dinner by to the coworker he’s seeing. She was planning to introduce him to her family. He never told her he was married, so knowing I would tag along if he came, he faked having a “fever” so he couldn’t go out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 577

You deserved it 108

The Top

Today I've finally found love and contentment in my wonderful relationships with my girlfriend and boyfriend. We are the perfect thruple and very happy together. My mom has just disowned me because of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 595

Today, my mother-in-law screamed at the top of her lungs in front of our friends and family that I was stealing her baby away from her. I'd only suggested we go home because he had a migraine. Her baby is 24 years old and has been married to me for a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 493

You deserved it 284

Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 936

You deserved it 3 348

Today, my friends and I went out drinking, and luckily enough, the guy I have had a crush on for four years now was there. I tried to get drunk so that I can make a move and blame it on the alcohol. I went in to whisper my confession in his ear... only to puke on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 755

You deserved it 68 033

Today, I was driving when I noticed that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulled up next to him, pulled out my phone and I made a gesture that he needed to put his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket for driving while on my cell phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 082

You deserved it 34 378

Today, my manager said it was my choice to have surgery on my arm and that I shouldn't complain, everyone goes through pain. She's right, but I was born with a birth defect in my wrist. The surgery was going to happen sooner or later, I didn't want to be born this way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 58