balkangirl94
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Great conversation starter
Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Grossed out
United States
You're weird, dude
Today, a slightly older guy friend of mine told me that he thinks of me as a little sister. Immediately afterwards, he tried to make out with me. FML
fme
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my cousin came to visit from Texas. It would have been great if he hadn't groped me and whispered, "Incest isn't illegal" when he saw me. FML
whateven333
Gibsonia, United States
Weirdo
Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him get through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML
anon
United Kingdom
Freaked out
Today, whilst visiting one of my distant cousins for the first time in years, she came onto me. After gently explaining to her that this was inappropriate, she broke down in tears. Whilst I awkwardly comforted her, she started stroking my inner thigh, apparently still trying to seduce me. FML
Pinsky
Chicago, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Comeback
Today, I walked in on the guy I called a cuck in high school going down on my sister. FML
Anonymous
Graham, United States
Family matters
Today, I found out that my uncle, who is still married to my aunt, is trying to seduce my mom. FML
Anonymous
Mountmellick, Ireland 🌶️ Spicy
Inappropriate
Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML
Anonymous
Amman, Jordan
Keeping it in the family
Today, my dad tried to hook me up with someone. It wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't my cousin. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Pants on fire
Today, I was told by my sister over the dinner table that some guy is telling people I’ve had sex with him; that’s not even the worst part. He’s telling people my sister walked in. One, I haven’t talked to him in years; two, he’s really not my type, three, I’m in a relationship. FML
Thai that on for size
Silverdale, New Zealand
Today, a guy kept flirting with me despite all my hints for him to kindly fuck off and die, so I lied and said I'm a lesbian. This didn't stop him. It got so bad, I had to claim I was born with a dick and say that's why I like girls. Only then did he say "Eeewww..." and back off. FML
Top comments
StoryOfTheYear 14
"Well...only of you incest."
StoryOfTheYear 14
Sigh... If you*
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Comments (221)
smileeee_fml 0
#17 I agree. WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU? who the hell would like their username to be 'bluewaffles'. You are sir insane.
AyeTee77 18
I bet there will be an FML shortly saying "Today, I made the move to have sex with my sister. I started off by telling her how great incest is. It didn't work. FML."
KiddNYC1O 20
Seems legit. Lol I kid.
kyrosk91 6
If he is in any way, shape, or form related to you, run away and never come back.
OfficeNinja 5
Are you sure you did not stray north of the Florida border into Georgia?
SouthernPride95 19
Yeah cause it cant happen anywhere else its always gotta be in the south it can in other places to dont be a dick
OfficeNinja 5
Calm down. While it can happen anywhere, it is more likely to happen in Alabama than New York. For that matter, more likely to happen in Alabama than Texas. Arkansas? I'll call it even odds. And for what it is worth, I live in a southern state. I'm deeper south than you, unless you live in the Florida keys. I'm so far south, I have to drive north for 6 hours to get close to "the south". Therefore, I have license to make as many redneck jokes as I want.
xtremegarbo 3
Two questions come to my mind. Was he talking about his sister? And was her name Brittany?
lrgenesis 19
Hahahaha I remember that fml
jellyD 1
Well, if he is a second cousin, once removed, genetically it is safe. If he is only related by marriage it is safer, but I have not factored in the creepy factor.
flipnazn 1
Why roam, when you can get it at home?
mnsnwnd 3
That is just wrong on so many levels...
gazzdogs 5
It's a username, chill the **** out.