Weird, Creepy and Intimacy: Great conversation starter - FML

Great conversation starter

By balkangirl94 - 23/12/2011 07:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 472

You deserved it 3 728

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

By fme - 27/01/2018 15:00

Spicy

Today, my cousin came to visit from Texas. It would have been great if he hadn't groped me and whispered, "Incest isn't illegal" when he saw me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 825

You deserved it 358

Weirdo

By whateven333 - 18/02/2015 04:02 - United States - Gibsonia

Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him get through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 909

You deserved it 2 682

Freaked out

By anon - 07/02/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst visiting one of my distant cousins for the first time in years, she came onto me. After gently explaining to her that this was inappropriate, she broke down in tears. Whilst I awkwardly comforted her, she started stroking my inner thigh, apparently still trying to seduce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 108

You deserved it 135

Comeback

By Pinsky - 20/09/2021 01:00 - United States - Chicago

Spicy

Today, I walked in on the guy I called a cuck in high school going down on my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 1 905

Inappropriate

By Anonymous - 24/04/2015 19:39 - Ireland - Mountmellick

Spicy

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 630

You deserved it 3 252

Keeping it in the family

By Anonymous - 12/10/2021 15:01 - Jordan - Amman

Today, my dad tried to hook me up with someone. It wouldn't be so bad if she wasn't my cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 81

Pants on fire

By Anonymous - 30/12/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was told by my sister over the dinner table that some guy is telling people I’ve had sex with him; that’s not even the worst part. He’s telling people my sister walked in. One, I haven’t talked to him in years; two, he’s really not my type, three, I’m in a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 96

By Thai that on for size - 25/09/2015 19:56 - New Zealand - Silverdale

Today, a guy kept flirting with me despite all my hints for him to kindly fuck off and die, so I lied and said I'm a lesbian. This didn't stop him. It got so bad, I had to claim I was born with a dick and say that's why I like girls. Only then did he say "Eeewww..." and back off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 419

You deserved it 2 664

By paintfarts1976 - 10/05/2013 19:01 - Ireland - Mullingar

Spicy

Today, my husband angrily accused me of cheating on him. It turns out he thinks that because I've been spending time with my brother recently, the two of us must be having some kind of incestuous affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 170

You deserved it 4 235

By Anonymous - 20/12/2016 07:28

Today, someone flirted with me. They kept touching me, insisting we should go out sometime, and hounding me for my number. At a family-only memorial service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 797

You deserved it 532

Next

Top comments

StoryOfTheYear 14

Friday 23 December 2011 12:02

"Well...only of you incest."

StoryOfTheYear 14

Friday 23 December 2011 12:11

Sigh... If you*

Comments

gundito 2

Friday 23 December 2011 15:15

You're from florida... What did you expect?

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

Friday 23 December 2011 15:22

U guys should try og mudbone on google and click the blog it's really funny :D

nsnforever 2

Friday 23 December 2011 15:32

"Hey baby, you remind me of my sister. Wanna go back to my place and talk about it *creeper wink* That's disgusting though. I feel for you. FYL, indeed.

ninjacapo 2

Friday 23 December 2011 15:35

If hes in your family... Fyl

katves 3

Friday 23 December 2011 15:38

Haha?

Okayitwasme 0

Friday 23 December 2011 15:43

Oh man! That's so sick! I hope you never see that creep again!

perdix 29

Friday 23 December 2011 15:46

Was he talking about his past or asking you about yours?

xbrit551 13

Friday 23 December 2011 15:47

Sexy

katves 3

Friday 23 December 2011 15:51

Who?

pev8 3

Friday 23 December 2011 15:56

Someone call Spiderman!

gazzdogs 5

Friday 23 December 2011 16:04

seems legit ^

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Keywords

Video games Gamers Annoying Relatable Abuse Birthday Scams Money Social Media Kids School Education Parents Public freakouts Health Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Transportation Bikes Cops Fight Family Customers Work Gross

The Top

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 409

You deserved it 2 826

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 183

You deserved it 47 587

The Top

Today, I don’t ask much, just a bit of peace and my armchair, but now I don’t get either since my wife rescued a pitbull that weighs 8 stone, barks constantly and hates me. The first night it was here, it sat on my chair and bit me when I tried to move it, then overnight tore my chair to bits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 117

You deserved it 160

Today, my family got detained by airport security thanks to one of their dogs. It didn't even bark to indicate there was something wrong, though. It just kept sniffing my dad, probably because we had our dog with us in the car on the way there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 554

You deserved it 1 122

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 245

You deserved it 34 480

Today, I lost my virginity, I think. Does it still count if she left halfway through, laughing? FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 859

You deserved it 10 691

Today, I learned that when I got my driver's permit, I agreed to be the designated driver for my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 355

You deserved it 4 239

Today, after months of delays, my home renovation is nearing completion. Well, it was nearing completion. Last night, a pipe burst, flooding the entire house. The water damage will cost more to repair than the entire renovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 334

You deserved it 232