Get out there!

By Anonymous - 16/07/2018 19:00

Today, I told my unemployed boyfriend to pick a town anywhere in the country that he thinks he can find work in. I offered to find myself a job there, find a flat, and pay for rent, bills, and food while he looks. He said I was selfish for wanting him to hurry up. It's been three years. FML
I agree, your life sucks 4 480
You deserved it 1 352

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You've been more than reasonable. If you are at the point where you think this is FMLable you really need to decide if it is worth staying with him.

Comments

He's using you. It's doubtful he actually cares about you, because no one would do that to someone they truly care for. You've waited long enough for him to change. Time to leave.

He may be dealing with depression and/or anxiety, among other things. A lot of people here are quick to say "dump him", but that is not how we treat people we love. Relationships are not all sunshine and roses and communication is important. His reaction to your suggestion strongly points toward some form of mental health issue. Have a gentle conversation and steer him toward seeking some help.

Shut the hell up!! Now everything is always blamed on depression and anxiety. He's lazy as **** and she needs to leave his ass.

Actually, I said what I said as someone who IS unemployed (for longer than op's boyfriend might I add), and DO understand the potential for anxiety. Fact of the matter though, is that relationships take a certain level of commitment on BOTH sides, so if you're not prepared for that you need to get yourself to a level where you are first. That's not to say you should never lean on your partner, but there is a HUGE difference between getting help from someone and having your responsibilities handled for you for 3 years.

WeirdUS 29

True but three years and his response stop rushing him doesn’t sound like he’s depressed. At this point it’s definitely hurting the significant other for having to support him.

OP is already being far more supportive than any of us would be. Disabilities are not an excuse to be a leech.

You may be absolutely correct, but as someone with managed but extreme depression and anxiety, staying only enables him. The relationship doesn't have to end, but the inequality and lack of a plan to change needs to be over yesterday.

You need to proactively pick a town in the Friend Zone and send him there on a one-way ticket, then you need to move on and start living a real life.

It's been 3 years... you know he is never going to try and find a job as long as he can mooch off of you. Dump him faster than yesterday's hit single (you know... like that Canadian man-boy)

Justine Malang 16

Wow he's very very very very very very lazy and irresponsible.

why should he work? apparently you dont mind him not working since its been 3 years. ydi

Celestyna 16

A bunch of ignorant ***** here, it took my partner three years to find a job too and he was ******* looking, but where I live you need intense qualifications, even for cleaning jobs you need diplomas in sanitisation etc. He is employed in full time work now, but there is more to life than being with someone for their money. Stop being a bunch of gold diggers and love them for who they are, not for what they bring home.

Girl, did he call you back yet? This clearly wouldn't be a FML if the boyfriend had been ACTIVELY trying to get a job for 3 years. But since you're so set on putting yourself on a pedestal you clearly missed the point. Clap for yourself, Gertrude.

um it clearly says he's not looking. idiot.