Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Today, after breaking my leg, I'm unable to put any weight on it whatsoever. Our bedroom? Upstairs. Our only bathroom? Basement. My husband thought it would be a great idea to leave me alone and unable to walk to go babysit his nieces. I had to piss in a bucket. FML
Today, my neighbour decided to get high while leaving his bathtub running, resulting in passing out and starting a flood in the hallways. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange sound that sounded like a lot of water being poured into a sink. It was actually my father in law using the bathtub as a toilet. He's staying with us, and is showing no signs of leaving any time soon. He thinks this is acceptable behavior. FML
Today, I found out my roommate thinks the sink is an appropriate place to wash his junk. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML
Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I discovered that the stream of water that periodically falls onto the ground outside my apartment window isn't actually water. The guy above me regularly pees out of his window onto his balcony. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stronghand0331 17
That's not laziness, that is pure innovation.
IFightFoos 0
Idiot? That man is a genius!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (240)
dragunina 0
**** you that guy is a genius
seniors 5
If he's a lazy idiot how did he connect all those together? Ppl wouldn't have thought about that So the Guy is a genius :D
RedFury 0
Ur roommate is epic!! :D
sallen0046 4
That's an awful lot of pre-planning and line running for a guy you claim is so lazy...
Rakshasa23 0
Dude.... This doesn't belong on FML. Try MLIA. Your roommate just might be the most awesome person ever. ^_^
Beaniebabima 0
How the hell is this genius? It shows how much of a lazy **** he is!!!!!!!!!! Thats just nasty. Get up get a huge jug of water, and use that for a drink. Get up piss and or shit in the potty. After I had my c-section i was up n at em 8 hours later dam
Acousticpixie14 6
Yeah, it's lazy. That what makes it genius. He made it possible for him to be that lazy. Get it?
kcnutt10 1
Idiot?!? No, that is GENIUS!
notsofriendly 17
he is brilliant. and probably going to get sicker from drinking nasty garden hose water
Ruckainc 0
Idiot? More like mad genius!
frostiebeanz 0
he is sick leave him alone