Intimacy: Erm… what?

Erm… what?

By UrbanCass - 25/06/2009 23:44 - United States

Today, I finally had sex with a girl I've been dating for over a month. Before we got started she told me not to worry about the birth control, because she could handle that. So after we finished I asked her what kind of birth control she used. She said she meditated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 494

You deserved it 77 024

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Same thing different taste

Some people are so... creative.

By Anonymous - 17/02/2018 06:00

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 466

You deserved it 1 597

By Anonymous - 16/09/2012 15:32 - United States - Acton

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 813

You deserved it 59 613

By Anonymous - 12/01/2014 00:03 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 191

You deserved it 8 900

Comeback

By sadguy - 18/02/2009 22:07 - United States

Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 147

You deserved it 23 280

By prayforme - 11/11/2009 01:52 - United States

Today, I woke up next to the girl I had drunk intercourse with last night. Before we got it on, I noticed a package of birth control pills on her nightstand. Because of this, I felt no need to use a condom, or pull out. When I woke up, I noticed those "pills" were actually a makeup case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 054

You deserved it 63 302

I don't understand!

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she did not want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 091

You deserved it 656

By wtfjusthappened - 31/01/2014 15:29 - United States - Redmond

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 894

You deserved it 13 063

Nice try, chief

By Anonymous - 04/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 013

You deserved it 15 202

The best method!

By Anonymous - 04/01/2020 18:00

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 013

You deserved it 967

By Confused - 22/08/2012 16:33 - Spain - Madrid

Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 829

You deserved it 4 434

starflake 3

Friday 26 June 2009 10:23

Lol, YDI. Take some responsibility for yourself you idiot.

Sawadee 0

Friday 26 June 2009 10:16

No control is the best control.............. You can secretly mixed the plan b into her food or drink

Comments

SheoDagana 0

Thursday 10 June 2010 19:06

Ah, women and their silly ways of trapping men... But YDI for falling into the trap.

rety1 13

Thursday 29 July 2010 7:49

lol. I think I'd have to get a hose and soap and a toilet brush and clean my stuff out of there asap....

guitar0501 0

Friday 20 August 2010 8:32

what a ******* retard.

stevenmx86 7

Wednesday 6 April 2011 21:13

For over a month huh? Finally dood can't believe it took a whole month!

Babygirl2338 0

Saturday 9 April 2011 4:16

sadddd.

narutou546 4

Friday 6 May 2011 4:31

must be a hoe since y'all did it after only one month.

darlingdollie 24

Saturday 28 May 2011 0:26

Cover your stump before you hump!

beeboyaxl 2

Friday 10 June 2011 7:04

Bahahahaha! win!

takeajoke 5

Sunday 11 September 2011 21:24

It's your fault you dated her for that long and did not realize she's a dumb ass girl.

havoc91 0

Sunday 13 November 2011 16:53

Dude I've been with my fiancé for 3 years and me and her haven't had sex with each other. Don't you ****** dare say finally in another post about getting sex! You better be a ****** father you immature selfish son of a bitch because you had sex with her and trusted her to actually be on birth control. Condoms are a mans true best friend when it comes to playing safe.