Love: Double dump

Double dump

By dumped - 10/03/2011 21:42 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 518

You deserved it 4 024

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/05/2015 17:20 - Canada - Qu?bec

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 941

You deserved it 2 772

By musicyman55 - 19/12/2009 07:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend who I love very deeply dumped me two times, over the phone. The first time was to dump me. She then called me back a couple hours later explicitly to dump our friendship. I was just friend dumped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 655

You deserved it 3 051

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 299

You deserved it 3 863

By fucklife - 16/04/2013 18:13 - United States - Washington

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 521

You deserved it 5 203

It's for the best

By yesguysgetabusedtoo - 24/05/2013 23:42 - New Zealand - Papamoa

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 612

You deserved it 6 946

By kukadaman - 15/03/2010 06:19 - United States

Today, I came home to hear my girlfriend break up with me, over the answering machine, with my entire family in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 615

You deserved it 2 387

By whysheheartless - 03/11/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 885

You deserved it 3 060

By dharp7 - 16/11/2011 05:23 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Her exact words used were "I like the idea of you, but I don't like you." I still don't know what that means. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 088

You deserved it 3 764

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 761

You deserved it 2 887

By ddll - 05/09/2011 01:27 - Singapore

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 302

You deserved it 12 323

Gurljuice 0

Friday 11 March 2011 0:02

She doubled her relief

sassypants93 17

Friday 11 March 2011 0:02

That sounds like she got a big dumping in more ways than one.

Comments

danaaaLaEpic 0

Wednesday 16 March 2011 0:34

talk about 'shitty luck' bahahaha

randomreader2315 4

Wednesday 16 March 2011 18:24

That's real....classy. I hope you don't think you're at a loss here. ******* disgusting.

1luv1child1heart 0

Monday 21 March 2011 9:46

haha...eww!

alexapinkpants 3

Saturday 26 March 2011 9:00

I love your name. It goes so well with the story lol.

IRISHLASS60 1

Monday 28 March 2011 20:08

She's a pig ! You're better off without her ! Consider yourself lucky that she's gone !

FatMan23 10

Thursday 26 May 2011 9:53

Nothing says 'I'm leaving you' like taking a crap over the phone.

Narwhal234 6

Thursday 29 September 2011 4:45

She was a waste of time.

boxofrogs 2

Friday 30 September 2011 6:00

Dump n' dump.

sammyluvspugs 4

Friday 25 May 2012 0:45

She dumped ya while takin a dump ;)

Midnightpearls 13

Friday 28 September 2012 18:28

Looks like you weren't the only thing she dumped.

Keywords

Hair Animals Cute Tattoos Sex AITA OCD Love Mental health Health Relatable Work Relationship advice Nepotism Management Clumsy Accident Awkward Miscellaneous Family Periods Food Embarrassing Airport Vacation Gross Zoom Cats My ex Parents

The Top

Today, I was sick during the night and had to puke. I had no bucket or trashcan nearby, so I ended up puking on the floor. However, because it was so dark, I didn't notice my cat lying in the exact spot where I puked. She was not amused, giving me the mother of all death glares before she started puking herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 127

Today, I was Whatsapping my boyfriend, as I am away for work. Before talking to him, I texted my work group I wasn’t feeling well after they invited me out. As I was chatting with what I thought was my boyfriend, I said, “I want your penis inside me.” And then realized I'd texted my work group. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 3 726

The Top

Today, it's been about a week since my boyfriend started his new medication, which has essentially killed any sex drive he had. It has also been about two weeks since I stopped mine, making me hornier than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 455

You deserved it 4 545

Today, my dad was given 2 VIP tickets to see my favourite band in concert next week. You can now find them on eBay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 656

You deserved it 4 241

Today, after countless nights spent together and flirty texts, I decided ask my crush on a date while at a party. We went on a walk and held hands. Just as I asked him, he said no, let go of my hand and briskly walked away. He was my ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 902

You deserved it 1 852

Today, I failed hard at a color test. I thought it was a joke because most of the colors looked the same to me. Now I know why people laugh at my clothes color choices. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 638

You deserved it 3 602

Today, some aggressive asshole was tailgating me on my way home, bumping into me twice. I got scared and kicked my car into high gear and got out of there. Seconds later, a traffic cop came out of nowhere and pulled me over for speeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 817

You deserved it 8 901

Today, I finally shared some of my insecurities and difficulties I’m experiencing with a close friend. The response was great, they listened, and gave advice. Later I met another friend, who said that they’re here for me. Everyone was just trying to help, but now almost everyone I know knows. I feel worse than before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 176

Double dump

Same thing different taste

It's for the best

Top comments

Comments