Disclosure

By ummm eww - 12/06/2020 20:05

Today, my friend and I decided to have a "special intimate" moment together at his house. As soon as I start to really get into it, he said to me, "I sort of wanna do your mom." Way to kill the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 017

You deserved it 284

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

By ohgod... - 02/04/2012 02:18 - Canada - Magog

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 213

You deserved it 3 438

Pick your moments, dude!

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 00:01

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 923

You deserved it 349

Great timing

By mylo - 03/12/2022 22:00

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to spice things up and do 69. My mom walked in on us right as we came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 092

You deserved it 569

By sarajj - 29/03/2013 21:36 - United States - Littleton

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 713

You deserved it 9 312

The moment when…

By wastedlove - 23/06/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 121

You deserved it 74 086

Knock next time please

By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 21:32 - India

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 990

You deserved it 815

Suave

By ooblie - 08/12/2010 08:22 - United States

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "My mom is SO awesome." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 004

You deserved it 4 022

By Anonymous - 23/02/2012 20:25 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 827

You deserved it 37 549

Why would you do that?

By Sam - 23/11/2009 01:35 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We were starting to get intimate, and I thought it would be kinky to tie his hands to his bed so he'd be more turned on. Suddenly his mom called us for dinner, but I couldn't untie him fast enough. I had to sit there, embarrassed, while his mom undid the rope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 126

You deserved it 29 855

By iris - 18/05/2012 23:01 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 252

You deserved it 36 291

RichardPencil 30

Friday 12 June 2020 20:46

Stacy?

tounces7 27

Saturday 13 June 2020 4:19

Well, she's got it going on.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Friday 12 June 2020 20:46

Stacy?

John Nemeth 14

Saturday 13 June 2020 0:39

Be thankful he didn’t say that after you guys had your “moment” Still an FML

BurnInDemonFire 35

Sunday 14 June 2020 6:10

How is after worse than during?

tounces7 27

Saturday 13 June 2020 4:19

Well, she's got it going on.

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The Top

Today, I whispered to my friend during a quiet church service, “This sermon is so boring.” Turns out the whole congregation heard me perfectly, including the pastor. I guess the acoustics in these places was designed by snitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150

You deserved it 480

Today, it's been a week since my girl told me she's pregnant and I fled town in a panic. I realized how badly I fucked up and called her, begging to come back. When I showed up at her house, her brothers kicked my ass and threw me in the street, promising to wring me dry for child support. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 1 016

The Top

Today, I found out my parents' entire marriage was a convoluted scheme to get them both permanently unfit to stand trial. I am genuinely scared to find out what they have planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 409

You deserved it 83

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 421

You deserved it 3 219

Today, I was at my friends' farm and we decided that we wanted to go to their old treehouse. When we got down there, it turned out my friend Cat had forgotten her shoes. Being a gentleman, I lent her my sandals. I then climbed the treehouse, fell out, and got a nail through my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 070

You deserved it 6 940

Today, I was horseback riding. Somebody yelled something behind me, so I turned around. Next thing I know, I am on the ground and my head is killing me. It turns out I ran into a tree branch. The person behind me simply said, "Watch out!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 699

You deserved it 8 267

Today, at work, I was trying to repeat an order back to this guy, when his drunk girlfriend started to interrupt me. Whenever I would open my mouth, she would say "Blah blah blah." Literally. Eventually, I gave up. I got his order wrong, and got yelled at by my manager for not repeating his order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 259

You deserved it 2 962

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman returned to the drive thru because her fries weren't hot enough. She was so angry about coming back that she threw her cold fries at me through the window and told me to "choke on them." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 842

You deserved it 6 828