Cool

By Anonymous - 29/10/2019 18:00

Today, I tore my calf muscle while skipping and singing Yellow Brick Road. I'm off my foot for 4-6 weeks and don't even have a cool story. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 376
You deserved it 395

Same thing different taste

Top comments

It is a cool story! Were you singing the version from "The Wizard of Oz" or Elton John's? If the latter, you can say you tripped hunting the horny-back toad.

I blame Glinda. That ***** could have sent Dorothy home the second she arrived, but instead made her go through hell just because The Wicked Witch of the West was too scary for her to face herself. Not only that, but who the **** wears ruby slippers without wearing a red dress, too? Red shoes look ridiculous paired with anything else, even a LBD. Glinda wasn't a "Good Witch", she was a Shit Witch. What were we talking about?

Comments

It is a cool story! Were you singing the version from "The Wizard of Oz" or Elton John's? If the latter, you can say you tripped hunting the horny-back toad.

I blame Glinda. That ***** could have sent Dorothy home the second she arrived, but instead made her go through hell just because The Wicked Witch of the West was too scary for her to face herself. Not only that, but who the **** wears ruby slippers without wearing a red dress, too? Red shoes look ridiculous paired with anything else, even a LBD. Glinda wasn't a "Good Witch", she was a Shit Witch. What were we talking about?

E2dav 5

You lost me at Glinda being a *****. Insulting Glinda is off limits bro

She did **** all, and basically caused Dorothy to go through Hell for no reason. If The Wicked Witch of the West wasn't stood in the splash radius when Dorothy threw the bucket of water over Scarecrow, do you think they would have survived? I don't. By sheer happenstance, they managed to beat the Witch, and only then did Glinda tell Dorothy she had the ability to go home all along. She didn't even prepare Dorothy for what lay ahead for her on her journey. All she did was tell her to "follow the Yellow Brick Road", and ask to see the Wizard upon reaching the Emerald City. After that, she was a total no-show until the balls-up which meant Dorothy didn't leave when the Wizard left. Glinda sucked, and I can only assume the Witch of the South was apathetic to the whole ordeal.

Kristoffer 35

So goodbye, yellow brick road, Where the dogs of society howl. You can't place me in your penthouse, I'm going back to my plow. Back to the howling old owl in the woods; Hunting the horny back toad. Oh I've finally decided my future lies Beyond the yellow brick road.

bullsonyourface 20

actually, that is an incredibly cool story. I look up to you.

Same thing happened to me last year. My story is even lamer: I walked from my office chair to the bathroom. Snap.

E2dav 5

Yeah...you're gonna need to come up with a cool story, or you'll never live it down with your mates. Pretend it's a soccer injury or something