Today, I went to a party and crashed on the bedroom floor. I woke up to sex noises coming from the bed. I pretended to still be asleep. I sent a text to my boyfriend to tell him about it. I heard his phone beep from over in the bed. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML
Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML
Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
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Top comments
boopityboppity 11
Perhaps he lent it to a friend? Or it's just a really big coincidence? Or... Yeah, he cheated on you. FYL.
YOUbeTROLLIN 0
if the room was dark you could've knocked out the girl he was with and just take her spot.
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Comments (212)
shotstack 0
Wait, why were you at the party without him?And how did you not notice him if he arrived later? Methinks there's a fake here...
livluvlaff8 0
maybe they went together but got seperated?
Phaa 0
Why can't she to a party without him?
mckkayua 0
woow best FML
shotstack 0
If I went to a party with my girlfriend and we'd got seperated, I'd be looking for her, not thinking about taking a nap. Besides, I think suspicions would be raised if anyone's partners disappeared at a mixed-sex party, these days.
shotstack 0
I didn't mean that she wasn't allowed, simply that maybe her boyfriend was sitting thinking that she was cheating on him because she went to a party without him. You know, diving off the deep end, as people are want to do nowadays.
mattthew 0
should of joined in
look_its_me 0
three way?
PoniumKitty73 0
okay but why would the boyfriend have sex with another person while the girlfriend was asleep in the room? :P ...maybe he was just... dreaming.. and... ya know.. he makes those noises in his sleep... :p
Melkezidech 0
There's a bedroom in the kitchen?
TapeMan_3000 0
kitchen what?
shotstack 0
^^ this.
xoconnie 8
hahaha FYL for him wanting someone else more than you. buttttt maybe he thought it was u if he was really drunk. but probbly not. wellllll sorryyyyyy. have a nice life.
Oigo 0
op y u lying? u no damn ryt u is a loner n dis is just another bs FML. *** fake ass niggas dude.
shotstack 0
Alright, I'm no grammar Nazi, but this is ridiculous.
Dwight_A_R_Manag 0
*** niggas that can't spell. FYL darkness
ReyEr9412 0
If the OP got wasted enough to blackout on the ground. it's possible that her bf also got extremely shitfaced. If he was superincredadrunk he wasn't really responsable for his actions. But that doesn't mean that he is blameless either.
tehamericanboy94 0
I smell a threesome :)
bettadenne1 0
why was he having sex while u were on the floor? did he not kno it was you cuz thts the stupidest way to cheat on someone
sc95060sc 0
sooo fakkkkeeee
thinmint 0
lmao at "darkness"!
hotpinkdiamond 0
lol agreed
Emmmmm55 0
true y would he do tht when ur right there he oviously saw u sleeping or not no one would do tht
Emmmmm55 0
fakeeee
ImaginaryFoe 1
She may not have seen him around cos she was asleep on the bedroom floor. Who goes to a party to sleep? Anyway, maybe he left his phone there. Easiest way to find out: look. Then do whatever comes naturally.
shtuff 0
Obviously the only thing to do in a situation like this is join in
srunano 4
Haha this is hilarious OP, I mean it sucks that he cheated on you but it made me laugh.You know what you have to do now OP
strawberryhtty 0
agree just bc ur in a relationship doesn't mean u can't be independent and go to parties with out ur boy/girl friend
evilspongebob 0
hahahhahha!!!!!! i love #10s picture! that movie kicks ass
JackRocksSoSuckI 0
THREESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!
StoryOfTheYear 15
funny thing is, her boyfriend either did not care or was already making out with her once they got into the room, cuz how do you not notice your (ex)girlfriend lying on the floor
look_its_me 0
25 had it right.
tyheron 0
#25 ftw. You would never have found out if you stayed in the kitchen. so you would probably been a happy little girl, but just like Eve you had to push the boundries. So be a good girl in the future and stay in the kitchen and nothing bad will happen to you. At least you wont find out. ignorance is bliss. Y D I !
samantha_durano 6
that's awkward.
Pommy_fml 0
#131 is a babe. what's kicken chicken?
dorkrockz 0
Wait y would he have sex in the same room u were in .... I bet I would of saw u
smellyoldlady 0
how do u know it was his fone like it could be a coincidence but he could have been jerkin off hahahaha just sayin tht wud be retarded to screw a girl in the same room ur gf is in
DavidCooksAngel 0
i sure hope you smack him in the face. then smack her.
cyqt 0
25 wins the internets
bobmandude 0
Best FML ever!
ilikepie789 0
147 is HOT!!!
MidgetMonster 0
how could you not have sensed SOMEWHERE inside of you, that your boyfriend is ( hopefully was, or YOU are even more retarded) a total P.O.S., like there wasn't any indicator that he was stupid enough to cheat on you in the same exact room you were in. and not just a silent little fast kiss, full blown out sex? what the hell is wrong with you for dating somebody like that ? who does something like that? as if he didn't already have douchebag qualities!!!
nessalujin 0
I can't believe you wasted your time typing all that. just sayin
poezpoee 0
I don't care if this is real or not or if it doesn't make sense but it still made me laugh so congrats OP
Emofluffinzhehe 0
giggidy heh
StoryOfTheYear 15
159- write a book on the subject
IeatzurKat 3
lol join in :)
hahafmlyo 0
she couldve known he was at the party or thought he had left, so she texted it to him. he mightve come when she crashed.
Aj4710 0
ummm...how did ur boyfriend not notice u out cold?
Jakethesnake7774 0
lol!!!
BoCo_fml 9
Sounds to me that OP is crashing on the floor, probably under blankets. BF comes in making out with the other girl and sees a lump on the floor. He's getting his jollies off then his phone goes off...lol too funny.
mochabear4 0
there are other reasons why she could have been napping like being hammered or being like ... tired make and yes plz bitch slap that boy then find someone to hook up with cuz at that point that relationship is over no use in fighting about it or talking about it
Liamj774 36
Are you eating?
_xxkitkatxx_ 0
...Well that sucks.
afatmonkey 0
The Llama of Intense Akwardness has struck again! Now where did I put those blueberry pancakes.....
ilikepie789 0
wtf?
helo2 0
yumy
MissAndreaSummer 0
wow what anasshole! at least you found out what a real skumbag he was. =(
ilikepie789 0
147 ur hot
Riku714 25
What is an anasshole? I'm not familiar with this particular termology.
FlubbaBubba 12
What is termology? I'm not familiar with this terminology.
Theblue_fml 0
someone's cheating...
tiffi_is_spiffi 1
#3 ya think??
BigBADBoY417 3
Join him
boopityboppity 11
Perhaps he lent it to a friend? Or it's just a really big coincidence? Or... Yeah, he cheated on you. FYL.
AlcaSMT 0
Or they slept together but she fell off the bed during the night, then some random girl hopped on the vacant ride while he's asleep.
YOUbeTROLLIN 0
if the room was dark you could've knocked out the girl he was with and just take her spot.
thikimo 0
why would she still want him after that? she should just knock them both out and draw mustaches on them and mabye snip something off
ydiftw 0
You know you wouldn't cut anything off. Don't lie. YDI for sleeping at a party.
Itzmeh 0
Cut only half of both of their hair off- that will teach them!
mfmylifesrsly 30
rofl :D
Metafiction 0
Snooze you lose?
look_its_me 0
this.
JE163 0
Perfect.
helo2 0
JPLY
rockstarxtina 0
wow, FYL. That really sucks.
Dathomir2 0
that sucks. well at least thisll be a great story to tell your future kids