look_its_me

Today, my boss asked me "can I give you some constructive criticism?". I said yes. He tells me "Your work is really shit. You have no talent and I can't figure out why I hired you." FML

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32

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

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107

Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I like my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML

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23

Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML

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37

Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML

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