Birthday, Gifts and Miscellaneous: Brown and sticky

Brown and sticky

By Jon - 14/03/2009 06:30 - United States

Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 152

You deserved it 6 334

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Life is a roller coaster

By Username - 02/10/2019 14:00

Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 866

You deserved it 171

Almost done

By Anonymous - 09/04/2013 04:59 - Canada

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick." One more year… FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 590

You deserved it 3 444

By chrono19 - 04/05/2014 10:11 - United States - Bremerton

Today, I got a birthday package from my parents. It was all the stuff I'd forgotten there when visiting a month ago, along with some other things I'd left behind when I moved out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 475

You deserved it 5 688

By stinkerweeder - 05/02/2011 20:30 - United States

Today, it was both my and my stepmother's birthday. In preparation, my dad bought a huge banner with my stepmother's name on it, and a lovely birthday cake. When I told him it was also my birthday, he just grunted and taped a post-it note to the banner with my name on it. Same with the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 811

You deserved it 3 036

By NosChersVoisins - 01/07/2014 04:55 - France - Bordeaux

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 177

You deserved it 5 935

Happy Birthday

By Anonymous - 07/10/2010 00:48 - United States

Today, my parents gave me my birthday present. Two weeks ago, I'd ordered an Xbox online. Three days ago, it came to my house, and my parents thought they could save money by putting wrapping paper on it, and giving it to me for my birthday. That's all they got me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 310

You deserved it 3 488

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 273

You deserved it 18 560

By reallyman__639 - 13/12/2011 12:26 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 556

You deserved it 17 501

By Birthday Surprise - 26/05/2014 21:18 - United States - Fayetteville

Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 637

You deserved it 4 986

By Florida_1827 - 28/01/2011 10:54 - United States

Today, I received the 'special' present my mother had sent me for my 21st birthday. I opened the box and saw that my mother had picked out, accessorized and shipped to me, in college, a doll. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 857

You deserved it 4 522

Inkspell 2

Saturday 14 March 2009 16:15

Wow, wtf, i rather get nothing. lmao, what the hell, seriously though, just grabbing a stick and giving it to someone is worse than saying "sorry, don't have a present.."

HelloFlower 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 16:23

You can do SO MANY things with a stick. The possibilities are endless.

Comments

shawttyyy3 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 4:08

omggg i went through the exact same thing.. my ex-boyfriend went to his cottage...told me he had a surprise.. i get allllllll excited...and he ended up getting me a ******* bigass stick from a beaver dam. "its the thought that counts" thanks..very thoughtful of u.

blinkingstarlet 15

Monday 30 March 2009 7:33

IT'S LOG LOG ITS BETTER THAN BAD, IT'S GOOD!!! lol ren & stimpy... anyone? lol FYL.

blinkingstarlet 15

Monday 30 March 2009 7:35

lmfao #54 bahaha

FajitaFreak 3

Monday 30 March 2009 17:25

Getting nothing, is better than getting a stick. I'd rather they forgot, than remember, and decide that a stick is enough. It's just sad. I'm sorry man.

ohsoglam 0

Thursday 16 April 2009 9:07

damn. that's the ultimate "we could give a shit less" present. hilarious though.

mwmessedupl 0

Monday 20 April 2009 2:26

I have a couple questions for the people that voted 'Jon' deserves this. *First of all how the ******* hell could he have prevented this i mean honestly its not like hes going to call up his parents and say hey dont get me a stick for my birthday, I mean who in their right mind does that. God you idiots bug me.