Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, my girlfriend of 5 months walked in on me naked while I was on the toilet. She proceeded to tell me that she wants to watch me taking a dump. I'm both shocked and too hard to do what she told me. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had the day off so we agreed fun by having the "afternoon in". In bed, that is. We got in bed, clothes off, and started to touch each other when she held her gut and yelled, "Oh shit! Oh shit! I have to shit!" She did a poop that came out like a waterfall. Diarrhea ended our fun. FML
Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to lick her ass. I obliged, only for her to rip a rancid fart directly on my tongue. Its been two hours and I'm still nauseous. Apparently, this was revenge for my "badgering her" for anal sex. I'd mentioned that butt play is one of my kinks, and dropped it when she wasn't interested. FML
Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML
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Top comments
KingCeltic77 18
That's really shitty.
kickuwithmyfist 1
Well.. you did get a hand job..so that's a plus!=D
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Comments (107)
Sk8erchick98 7
Ok, so how did it get stuck in there?
183933 6
She stuck her finger in his ass... Not got it stuck WTF try understanding what you read before making a stupid comment.
PYLrulz 17
Now I know you NEVER go ass to mouth, but ass to finger?!?
Aliicat16 9
Bahaha thanks for making my day but yea that does suck if you dont like it
Nish007 15
Dats da shit ryt der man
IW_RIOT 7
I'm questioning why your girlfriend would think sticking her fingers in your ass would feel good. Shouldn't it be vice versa?
Angelrose2004 17
It's equivalent to fingering a girl to hit her g-spot. If the girl does it right, they can massage the prostate and make you cum more. It serves the same purpose as anal beads. That is my sex lesson for the day ;)
lucaxel 3
She didn't stick it up enough, try again :)
natalia32710 8
ew why woud you let her?
florido_fml 10
You just got raped
tylerbisel 2
My girlfriend when we are walking around thinks it's hilarious to shove her finger up my butt"sneak attack" But she's not serious! 0_o
HandsomeRatch 20
To people not understanding why she thought it would feel good for him: the man's G-spot is located in the asshole. It's actually a small bump on the inside. Please correct me if I'm wrong here.