Love: A Natural Snack! - FML

A Natural Snack!

By Anonymous - 20/02/2017 17:00 - United States - Charles City

Today, my husband argued with me for an hour, because he believed that loaded potato skins grow naturally on a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 885

You deserved it 794

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

Extreme cooking

By oldmold - 23/07/2020 17:01

Today, my husband and I got into a huge argument. He called me wasteful for throwing out old food. He insisted that you can simply pick the mold off and the food was perfectly fine. He’s going to kill our kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 715

You deserved it 217

By Anonymous - 10/07/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 332

You deserved it 15 848

Nature calls

By anon - 27/07/2023 22:00

Today, my idiot boyfriend, who thinks he's an outdoorsman, made sauce from mushrooms he'd foraged. I refused to eat it. He got upset and had two helpings. He's now in bed, whining about how bad he feels. Stupid dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 166

By American Idiot - 20/09/2016 19:25 - United States - Duluth

Today, my husband picked a fight with me because I have more pictures of our child on my desk at work than I do of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 872

You deserved it 1 451

By mindlost - 07/01/2010 02:58 - United States

Today, I had an argument over whether or not I should buy some flowers. With myself. Out loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 261

You deserved it 29 453

By Anonymous - 20/08/2012 12:12 - United States - Worcester

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 350

You deserved it 5 916

By Anonymous - 05/03/2013 05:25

Today, I found out that my wife makes mashed potatoes by using her dirty feet to crush the potatoes because apparently this is a "healthy, natural" way to make them, and it also cleans her feet. I've been eating her mashed potatoes at least once every week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 841

You deserved it 4 753

By Anon - 15/05/2015 13:58 - United States - Lakeville

Today, my brother and I had a long argument. He believes wholeheartedly that pineapples are not actually fruits, but berries. When I showed him a google search, he accused me of "faking" it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 195

You deserved it 4 056

By ReComatosed242 - 09/03/2016 00:29 - Bahamas - Eleuthera

Today, my co-worker and I got into an argument. It ended with him threatening me to roll my balls with a paint roller until they looked like "fresh, popping doughs". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 962

You deserved it 1 397

Gross idea

By Anonymous - 09/03/2012 00:30 - Canada

Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 819

You deserved it 2 951

Next

Top comments

alternative-facts 6

Sunday 19 February 2017 19:35

They usually grow in close proximity to the cheeseburger bushes. Nom nom nom.

Tripartita 44

Tuesday 21 February 2017 0:44

You're a kinder person than me, OP. I would've given in, encouraged him to tell others and impress them with his knowledge, and wait for him to make an ass of himself.

Comments

BeachMammal 8

Tuesday 21 February 2017 3:55

Did he somehow conceal his lack of intelligence before you married him?

Cali 54

Tuesday 21 February 2017 16:14

He hid it behind his shiny abs.

cumminsncope 4

Tuesday 21 February 2017 7:49

Congratulations... you've married the biggest retard on the planet

jcash52426 5

Tuesday 21 February 2017 12:53

So go get him some "potato skins" and watch him eat them for dinner.

Sparkieemae 14

Tuesday 21 February 2017 19:21

Really? A tree? they obviously are roots just like regular potatoes. They originate from the same area as chocolate milk cows and easter egg chickens. Fun fact, easter egg chickens are just chickens who prefer to mate with rabbits, that's why they aren't fertile, similar to mules.

Max Gray 2

Wednesday 22 February 2017 0:58

YDI for marrying and breeding with someone with a low IQ, and prioritizing looks over intelligence. That's what you end up with. Now your kids will be stupid, and you will probably remain poor. Not a good choice

nitsud82 14

Wednesday 22 February 2017 10:30

ummmm, what?

samwilliams800 28

Wednesday 22 February 2017 14:55

YDI for marrying that moron.

ChrisBoswell 1

Wednesday 22 March 2017 2:58

Wait they don't?

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The Top

Today, it's my husband's and my first wedding anniversary. I came home from work hoping for at least a bouquet of flowers, only to find my husband passed out on the couch, with a few beer cans next to him. I guess I missed the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 771

You deserved it 218

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 166

You deserved it 133

The Top

Today, after hours of waiting and $300 spent, I find out my transmission is dying. My car is old, so the price of rebuilding it is more than it's worth. That's money well spent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 99

Today, I've been waiting two months for eight eBay purchases to make it through my country's fucked up customs fiasco. I'm reduced to vicariously sharing in my husband's delivery of a litre of industrial vinegar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 128

Today, during my shift at work, I started to feel really sick and started throwing up. While I had my head in a bag, I had several customers ask me for directions, and another customer abuse me for my lack of service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 129

You deserved it 2 449

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 671

You deserved it 3 159

Today, a black cat crossed in front of my truck and I thought to myself that it was funny people believe black cats bring bad luck. Not even two minutes later, I drove my truck into a ditch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 346

You deserved it 10 800

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend whilst on the train home from spending the weekend with him at his grandparents' house. It said, "Gran says to tell you that the bin beside the toilet is actually for storing spare shampoos and toothbrushes, so could you not put your tampons in it next time?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 119

You deserved it 8 467