By Anonymous Today, our 2-year-old poured honey on our baby. FML I agree, your life sucks 3900 You deserved it 390 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Canton Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML I agree, your life sucks 49994 You deserved it 6404 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By alrightsheryl - United States Today, is my 18th birthday. I call my parents and they tell me they found weed in the guest house and so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say "Happy Birthday." FML I agree, your life sucks 70475 You deserved it 4881 92 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Username - United States Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 53347 You deserved it 4566 234 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I have a busy week scheduled at work, so I took my file home to smash out some reports. Naturally I did not do any work at home and then I also forgot to take the file back to work the next day. Instead of saving time, I wasted an hour driving home to collect it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1055 You deserved it 2050 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 24/5/2020 17:00 Let it all out Today, I had too much to eat at dinner. I had to cut sexy time with my husband short because I couldn't do it. I feel bad because it's his birthday today but we stopped. I then proceeded to throw up everything I ate today. FML I agree, your life sucks 1367 You deserved it 589 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - Edmonton Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML I agree, your life sucks 29617 You deserved it 1879 81 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Retarded - United States - Tallahassee Today, I was asked to dumb myself down so the people I was training could comprehend what I was saying. FML I agree, your life sucks 40689 You deserved it 6967 116 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anbrown6 - United States Today, I found my dog, who had been missing for over a month, at the local pound. Clearly it was my dog, she responded to her name and cried when she saw me. However, the woman there told me I could not simply take her, I had to follow through with all policies. I paid $250 to adopt my own dog. FML I agree, your life sucks 71559 You deserved it 9748 199 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML I agree, your life sucks 52039 You deserved it 6161 222 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By seriously Today, I was spoken to by my boss about an argument I had gotten into with my co-worker, saying I needed to be "respectful of others' beliefs" and less "close-minded." The argument was over whether or not the Earth was flat. FML I agree, your life sucks 4766 You deserved it 368 27 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Ireland Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML I agree, your life sucks 78778 You deserved it 5599 265 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML I agree, your life sucks 61085 You deserved it 21153 218 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kendal - Canada Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML I agree, your life sucks 11149 You deserved it 49702 286 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sadlife - Canada Today, I opened my lunch in front of my friends at university. I had a note in my lunch from my mother that said "Have a good day sweetie! - Love mom". I wrote that note, and put it in my lunch to impress my friends. FML I agree, your life sucks 21260 You deserved it 66353 188 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - United States Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML I agree, your life sucks 37436 You deserved it 7634 137 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ohno - United States - East Stroudsburg Today, I found out that when my girlfriend said she gave up sex for lent, it was just with me and not my brother. FML I agree, your life sucks 43536 You deserved it 2940 147 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fuckyoutoothen! - 22/7/2020 08:02 Nice victim blaming! Today, I showed my friend all the dirty messages and dick pics her boyfriend had sent me. I included the ones of me telling him to stop. Instead of being mad at him, she flipped out on me, saying it’s my fault because I “dress too sexy” and he shouldn’t even have my number. He got it from her phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 2323 You deserved it 161 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Germany - W?rzburg Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML I agree, your life sucks 50961 You deserved it 3211 143 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Ponchatoula Today, my sister sent me countless pictures of my boyfriend making out with different girls at a bar. His excuse? Photoshop. FML I agree, your life sucks 54128 You deserved it 4304 84 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 28114 You deserved it 119073 219 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Audrey - 21/7/2020 14:01 My eyes! My eyes! Today, I walked in on my mom masturbating. I want to run away. I feel violated. FML I agree, your life sucks 1569 You deserved it 607 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ShiriSarah - United Kingdom Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML I agree, your life sucks 53837 You deserved it 153046 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By asdf - United States Today, was my high school's senior awards ceremony. Over 400 people were crammed in the hot auditorium. I won five awards and each time I was called up the laughter grew louder. Apparently even the back row could see my pit stains. FML I agree, your life sucks 46528 You deserved it 5338 115 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous W.T.F. Today, while getting dressed, I discovered that when my brother and his friends got drunk last night one of them wanked into a pair of my panties and put them back in my wardrobe. The crusty mess pressed right into my groin. I had to clean dry spunk out of my pubic hair. FML I agree, your life sucks 5896 You deserved it 574 42 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML I agree, your life sucks 44987 You deserved it 5134 286 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ben - United States Today, I was arrested for DWI in my own apartment complex. I had to be released into the custody of a sober adult, but I wasn't allowed access to my phone to get any numbers. I only have a few memorized. So I was picked up from jail by my ex-girlfriend and her fiancé - my manager at work. FML I agree, your life sucks 20971 You deserved it 17315 173 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - United States Today, I went into my office and told my boss that I hated my job and was quitting on the spot. I tried to leave quickly but I slipped and fell on the marble floor right in front of everybody during my exit. FML I agree, your life sucks 23075 You deserved it 6294 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By teacher - Australia - Sydney Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML I agree, your life sucks 35512 You deserved it 3166 93 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Saw - United Kingdom Today, I was walking down the street, when a car started cruising alongside me. I looked over, annoyed, at which point the driver started screaming obscenities and telling me that I'm "gonna get it" for "betraying" him, before angrily speeding off. I'm too scared to even sleep now. FML I agree, your life sucks 25565 You deserved it 2627 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, after ranting to my best friend about how all our friends are having kids and how teenage pregnancy will ruin their lives, she announced to me that she's pregnant. FML I agree, your life sucks 29580 You deserved it 7299 106 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cjhgvb - Canada - Halifax Today, I found out it is possible to get whiplash and a concussion from a tickle fight you have with your boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 31281 You deserved it 4202 37 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By noespresso - United States Today, after already having a terrible day, I went to Starbucks for an espresso. Being nice, I put the last dollar I had in my wallet in their tip jar. While paying for my drink, my card was denied for insufficient funds. The world hates me. FML I agree, your life sucks 33660 You deserved it 6410 126 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Today, I realized that I hadn't heard anything about my upcoming class reunion. Turns out it was an invite via Facebook that I didn't receive because most of my classmates are on my block list. FML I agree, your life sucks 3261 You deserved it 7721 29 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sisi9999 - United States Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML I agree, your life sucks 41905 You deserved it 3562 156 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By kellb123 - United States Today, I was at work, and was told to clean up the urine that a child had left down the slide inside the play place. While in the slide, another little kid peed on my head. FML I agree, your life sucks 31413 You deserved it 2555 88 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By oh, feck off - United Kingdom - Leeds Today, I missed an interview to work in a school as a teacher's assistant because the email inviting me to attend got buried among the spam emails. Oh well, back to my usual job as an assistant janitor. Yes, that's right, assistant janitor. It's the same job as a real janitor, but for less pay. FML I agree, your life sucks 12020 You deserved it 1468 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pistonchamp159 - United States Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML I agree, your life sucks 38607 You deserved it 9903 183 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nonnie31 - Canada - Edmonton Today, I arrived for the two-week scuba diving vacation I spent months saving, planning, and looking forward to. Today, I also developed an ear infection and can't scuba dive for 2 weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 14244 You deserved it 911 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - Lethbridge Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML I agree, your life sucks 15317 You deserved it 34430 211 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sleepless Today, my dad and I had to move in with my mom. There's only two tiny rooms, and my aunt lives there along with her dogs and my cat. The dogs have tried to kill my cat, I have to share the bed with my mom, who snores BAD, and I haven't slept in two days. I work early all week. FML I agree, your life sucks 2225 You deserved it 277 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By CheekyRaccoon | 27 #7418626 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 20:04 Well ain't that sweet? Send a private message 27 1 Reply
By thatnucca | 36 #7418803 - Thursday 2 March 2017 4:08 Oh sweet baby Jesus... Send a private message 10 1 Reply
By CheekyRaccoon | 27 #7418626 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 20:04 Well ain't that sweet? Send a private message 27 1 Reply
By dabomsht123 | 3 #7418641 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 20:21 Y'all must laughed like crazy. Send a private message 4 0 Reply
By Cali | 54 #7418656 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 20:40 The 2-year-old was worried about all that wispy hair and tried to help with a honey mask. So thoughtful! Send a private message Reply
By Rock_Lobsterr | 10 #7418657 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 20:42 RIP Huskers jersey. Send a private message 1 2 Reply
By loserman67 | 35 #7418669 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 21:37 Your baby looks like a sweetie ! Send a private message 3 0 Reply
By WhatHappenedToIt | 22 #7418735 - Wednesday 1 March 2017 23:59 wtf is "I agree, we'll spotted" suppose to mean haha Send a private message 3 3 Reply
By 0neiros | 13 #7418792 - Thursday 2 March 2017 3:12 This should be followed with - Today I got my ass beat for pouring honey on my sibling. FML Send a private message 1 0 Reply
By thatnucca | 36 #7418803 - Thursday 2 March 2017 4:08 Oh sweet baby Jesus... Send a private message 10 1 Reply
By embarrasseddaily | 7 #7418830 - Thursday 2 March 2017 5:17 that seems like a sticky situation Send a private message 2 2 Reply
Today, my mother suffered a stroke and had to be hospitalized. In order to drive him to the hospital, I actually had to find my father, who never answers... I agree, your life sucks 63 You deserved it 3 0 Comments
Today, the guy who told me he “wasn’t looking for a relationship” started being in a relationship with another girl. I lost my virginity to him and went... I agree, your life sucks 517 You deserved it 236 7 Comments