Work

Smash capitalism

By Anonymous - 20/06/2020 14:02

Today, I was basically treated to, "Hey, you're laid off by the end of the month. Oh, and would you mind training your replacement? We have budget cuts, and he works for less." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 113

A writer writes

By Anonymous - 12/06/2020 05:05

Today, my boyfriend came across an old poem I wrote. I like to write horror stuff, but he was disturbed, called it “silly” and “sad”, and said he didn’t want to have a girlfriend who thinks about stuff like that. I'm now discouraged from becoming a writer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 760

You deserved it 226

Capitalism kills

By glorified taxi driver - 11/06/2020 20:08

Today, after starting a new job, having two ovarian cysts rupture and been in and out of the hospital twice in a week, I'd been told that I couldn't work, needed surgery, and could lose my ovary. I’m 23. I was told that my job was secure and not to worry. I received my termination letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 527

You deserved it 142

Sounds bad

By Pururururin - 11/06/2020 08:08

Today, I accidentally deleted an audio file for my first professional video project. Impossible to do a retake, because the production budget was so tight. The audio from the camera sounds bad and file recovery program still can't help. Also, the deadline is this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 592

Notification sound

By Anonymous - 09/06/2020 02:00

Today, I farted during a Zoom call in front of our client. I thought mic was muted. My Team Lead had lot of things to say to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 166

You deserved it 801

Always wear protective gear

By Anonymous - 06/06/2020 14:02

Today, while nailing a board down, I hit my thumb with the hammer. As I reached to console my throbbing finger, I dropped the hammer on my foot. When I went down to hold my foot, I smacked my head on the board. Now I've got a concussion, a smashed finger, and a bruised foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 670

You deserved it 699

Breaking Badly

By Anonymous - 31/05/2020 20:00

Today, it was my first day as a pharm tech. Two hours into my shift, I came down with awful food poisoning, causing me to go to the restroom multiple times before eventually leaving. I'd filled multiple controlled substances today and can't help but think my coworkers are thinking I'm a drug addict. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 144

Noise annoys

By guiltyschuldig49 - 28/05/2020 14:00

Today, and for months, my upstairs neighbor has been stomping on their floors, hard enough to shake our walls. We thought it was their child, but found out it’s the mother. She took up running, and due to the pandemic, she does it in the living room. She's already been told to stop. Repeatedly. I work 12-hour nights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 855

You deserved it 142

British Broadcasting Corporation

By Anonymous - 27/05/2020 23:00

Today, working from home due to the quarantine, things were going slow so I typed "Lola Fox BBC DP porn" into my team chat, thinking I was typing it into my browser. My supervisor took it down as soon as it happened, but people definitely saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 3 376

Time is of the essence

By N/A - 26/05/2020 02:00

Today, my job offer from a Fortune 500 company was canceled because of the coronavirus. This is the third time this year a job I passed interviews and tests for got canceled. I’m an international student who just graduated last week. I only have 90 days to find a job to stay in the US. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 836

You deserved it 212

Oh, hai!

By Anonymous - 25/05/2020 20:00

Today, sleeping in a little late, I was woken up by my phone. Still tired, I quickly checked the display to realize it was my girlfriend calling. I pick up the phone saying, "Hey baby girl!" She seemed pretty startled, so I double-checked and realized it was my new boss, who has the name as my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 666

You deserved it 555

Live dumping

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 02:00

Today, I was having a mass lecture, for 3 classes combined, all microphones muted. I wanted to go to the toilet, so I connected my headphones, and I did my job massively while listening to the teacher. Suddenly, the teacher said, "Oh, close your mic for the love of god." 85 students heard me taking a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 2 142

The customer is always an ass

By zanaruka - 19/05/2020 05:00

Today, an angry customer rubbed her hand all over my face, all while showing me her positive COVID-19 test results. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 685

You deserved it 172

Tricky situation

By Anonymous - 14/05/2020 05:00

Today, my roommate in our barracks posted trans hate-speech on Facebook. My choices are to report him and risk ending his military career, confront him and risk him finding out I'm trans, or do nothing and live in fear of him figuring me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 414

You deserved it 570

Contradictions everywhere

By Anonymous - 14/05/2020 02:00

Today, I was demoted from my job because I didn't volunteer to help out with my job during COVID-19. I texted them on the day of sign-up to see if they had enough people. I was told since I was there not to worry about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 572

You deserved it 183

OK doomer

By KeepOnTruckin' - 07/05/2020 05:00

Today, it's been 3 weeks since I, a 17-year-old, have been working 50 hours a week at a grocery store trying to keep our shelves stocked during coronavirus panic-buying. It was also the day a customer informed me that, "All you teenagers are lazy and that's why the shelves are empty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 451

You deserved it 177

Spooky

By Anonymous - 29/04/2020 17:00

Today, I work as a RGN in an old victorian-style nursing home. Due to Covid-19, we've lost many residents, one passing just the night prior while I was with him. This morning, the TV turned on its own at nearly 4 a.m. in the lounge, and one of the HCAs reported stuff falling off in the corridor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 708

You deserved it 174

Not now!

By fml9124 - 25/04/2020 20:00

Today, the best manager I've ever had told me she was leaving to take a job at another company. I just found out my new manager is a guy that has destroyed three different departments in three years. He's the owner's nephew or something. I do not want to be looking for a new job during the Covid-19 pandemic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 852

You deserved it 140

Stay safe, wear a hazmat suit

By Davey Crocker - 23/04/2020 08:00

Today, my coworker volunteered me to drop laptops off at two sites outside our normal areas. I asked if they were safe from COVID-19. "I don't know, but you're young. You'll be okay," responded the man who's been working from home for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 589

You deserved it 224

Big Brother

By Anonymous - 14/04/2020 20:00

Today, I was accused of "spying too much" on what my coworkers are writing about Covid-19 on the news site I work for. I'm one of the supervisors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 592

You deserved it 175

No one likes a smart-ass

By Anonymous - 13/04/2020 08:00

Today, I accidentally stumbled on a method of getting my job done in about a third of the time, so my boss made it mandatory for all employees. Unfortunately, my coworkers now can't slack off pretending jobs take 2-3 hours, and their constant petty revenge bullying is driving me mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 322

You deserved it 963

Not all heroes…

By pooped - 12/04/2020 23:00

Today, at work, the only toilet in the building was so clogged that it was overflowing. We didn't have a plunger, so basically the only way to stop it was to try and reach in and remove the blockage. I was nominated to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 902

You deserved it 183

Eat the rich

By Anonymous - 11/04/2020 17:00

Today, at work, I found out that they are taking all bonus pay away, but giving us an extra $1 an hour due to Covid-19. Last week, they laid off half my department. Those people laid off are making more money on unemployment than I am now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 914

You deserved it 146

What's your emergency?

By Anonymous - 06/04/2020 23:00

Today, I found out that because I'm a cop, my 5-year-old son thinks the only way he can contact me is by calling 911. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 839

You deserved it 326

Hard to bare

By Anonymous - 03/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was showing my boss a picture on my phone. I didn’t expect her to take my phone from my hand and continue to flip through photos. I anxiously motioned for her to give my phone back, only to realize she had already swiped to my nude picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 044

You deserved it 811

Tonight, on Asshole Bosses…

By ThanksAsshole - 28/03/2020 20:00

Today, I got fired from a business I ran for almost 6 years. Why? The new owner refuses to close, despite our governor ordering non-essential businesses to close, and for people to stay home. I told her I wasn’t comfortable working, and that it was technically illegal. So she fired me in a group chat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 297

You deserved it 207

Slicey machine go thwack

By Anonymous - 28/03/2020 05:00

Today, I lost my job due to the coronavirus. I have no way to pay my bills and very few places are hiring just now. My boss tried to make me feel better by saying her husband was just laid off and they'll struggle as well. She has a £120k salary and just got a £30k bonus. Apparently, "we're in the same boat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 181

You deserved it 191

Is he the guy from the earlier FML??

By sourgirl101 - 25/03/2020 02:00

Today, my husband's number was mistakenly added to a group chat of my co-workers dealing with COVID-19. Despite my asking him to stop, he keeps sending corny memes that has offended most of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 464

You deserved it 338

Rules are rules

By Anonymous - 24/03/2020 08:00

Today, as I was leaving a night shift at McDonald’s, a woman wanted to use the toilets. I explained our doors didn’t open until 7 a.m. now due to COVID-19. She wouldn’t take no for an answer and as I went to walk off, I got a swift knee in the nuts for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 810

You deserved it 173

No rest for the heroes

By J Claire Sanchez - 22/03/2020 15:56

Today, everyone has been advised to stay home and self-quarantine due to the COVID19 outbreak. This would've been great and all, especially since I'm pregnant and need the bed rest, but I work as a doctor and we're understaffed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 081

You deserved it 198

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 341

You deserved it 433

Today, I had to come to terms with the truth that I'm absolutely terrible at parallel parking. After three failed attempts, I finally gave up and parked in a spot labeled "No Parking" just to make it stop. Of course, a car pulled in right behind me and blocked me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 573

Today, I was thrown out of a pub and when the owner was sure no one else could hear him, he whispered in my ear how dare I, "a filthy n****r", set foot in his pub, and if it was up to him "they'd bring back lynchings for my sort." The police didn't do anything, because there was no evidence he'd said it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 400

You deserved it 279

Today, I found out that I have enough driving skills to manage to hit a pothole and have two of my tires go flat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 032

You deserved it 19 511

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 978

You deserved it 6 287

Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex-girlfriend who never moved out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 443

You deserved it 2 894