Boredom

Woohoo, party time!

By Dp. - 27/03/2021 13:59

Today, after 22 years, I finally got promoted to senior tech. My wife bitched about the reheated lasagna and I drank a fifth of whiskey. A celebration dinner to remember FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 162

Yapping and chirping

By My headphones were busted - 08/05/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I was stuck on a packed interstate bus for hours next to 2 complete strangers, even to each other, have an debate about the "Drake and Kendrick beef." They even tried to drag me into it, so… if you happen to read this and recognize yourselves, I was the guy in a white UA hoodie pretending not to speak English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 96

By Theboredone - 29/03/2018 19:00

Today, after a week on bed rest in a cast after ankle surgery, I got so bored and lonely I agreed to do an hour-long government phone survey just to have someone to talk to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 814

You deserved it 406

Live from the lounge

By Jake - 10/02/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, I was supposed fly from NOLA to Philly. Being a good roommate, I decided to get a noon-time flight so my roommates wouldn't need to get up early. Then I found out that they were also taking separate vacations, and leaving at 5am. Now I'm stuck in the airport till noon and I arrive in Philly at 7pm. I'm also broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 751

Riveting

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend told me she was bored. During sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 752

You deserved it 23 205

Bored stiff

By adsfkerfmpo - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I made a date to try to save our relationship. I sat in his room for hours while he watched YouTube videos of World of Warcraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 255

You deserved it 8 072

Small town blues

By Alyxandrea - 25/05/2020 23:00

Today, our town is so bored that the most entertainment we got was on the local buy and sell trade page, where someone posted that they got someone else's package in the mail, and everyone in town spent 6 hours trying to guess what was in the box. It was actually the highlight of most of our day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 437

You deserved it 209

Bored senseless

By Anonymous - 01/10/2010 16:55 - United States

Today, I started my first day of work. I was told to absorb everything going on and to get used to the high-paced flow of things. I've been sitting at my desk for two hours now, and the office has been empty since I've walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 327

You deserved it 2 994

I'm so bored

By Anonymous - 11/02/2022 10:00

Today, I’ve worked out that my neighbour is cheating. Her husband leaves at 7, another guy arrives at 9, vigorous sex noises last for an hour, then the guy leaves. It’s come to this has it, I’m so bored since losing my job that I’ve become a nosy neighbour lady. Why won’t anyone hire me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 204

You deserved it 253

The "No phones" rule

By bossproblems - 17/10/2016 18:47 - United States - Orlando

Today, I found out how my salesmen are "entertaining" themselves since they were told they can't have their phones on them. They're pulling straws to see who will pretend to trip and fall face-first onto the floor in front of customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 845

You deserved it 1 539

Exciting!

By dummy - 22/07/2022 02:00

Today, the most excitement in my week has been getting my new electric toothbrush in the post. I honestly can’t wait for it to charge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 213

Great start

By Anonymous - 20/03/2023 06:00

Today, I went on a date with a guy who kept checking his phone every five minutes. When I asked him if everything was okay, he told me he was just playing Candy Crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 111

Skip intro

By Anonymous - 25/07/2023 21:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, I was telling my boyfriend about what happened to me during the day when he stopped me mid-sentence, asked me to skip the middle and to go right to the end of the story, because he could feel himself slowly dying of boredom. Rude much? FML

I agree, your life sucks 803

You deserved it 807

Girls' trip!

By solo - 12/10/2023 10:00

Today, I'm on a road trip with my girlfriends, and they're all telling each other stories about their sex lives. Me, as I'm a virgin, I'm writing this FML, bored to death due to not having anything to contribute to the conversation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 184

Life is boring

By jay1998 - 24/02/2022 05:00 - Sudan

Today, I miss what it’s like to be in college. I didn’t know life after graduation was so empty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 217

Top of the morning to ya!

By Bored - 09/02/2023 02:00

Today, I set my alarm for AM instead of PM. Woke up at 5AM to realize I have nothing to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 332

Helicopter parents

By Anonymous - 10/07/2021 16:01

Today, my wife finally let our kids stay the night at my mom's house, meaning we had our first night totally alone together in 6 years. She spent all night texting my mom for updates on the kids or on the phone to her sister, so I watched a film by myself then went to bed bored at 8:15 p.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 357

You deserved it 186

That one Orson Welles .gif

By I AM SO BORED - 06/12/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I sent a message to vent about my boring team meeting to the team group chat instead of to my friend. Everyone responded with a virtual slow clap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70

You deserved it 760

Now we know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall

By Anonymous - 16/05/2019 20:25

Today, it appears that I spent three years of my life studying for a degree to find myself driving around looking for potholes. That's literally my job. I didn't even study roading, my civil engineering degree is in designing structures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 271

Impressive dating strategy

By Anonymous - 17/08/2022 22:00

Today, my date took me to some sort of comic book/computer convention. I think he was trying to impress me with his online reputation, but it didn’t come across as tech suave, it was more nerd pathetic, the kind that makes vaginas go dry faster than a sand enema. I went home alone, bored. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 1 214

Riveting

By jobless - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I fell asleep during a job interview, while it was taking place over the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 856

You deserved it 30 886

"At least you've got a job" - Mr. Missingthepoint

By Anonymous - 13/09/2019 16:01

Today, I drove an hour to work, did nothing for 8 hours, drove an hour back, and then studied for 4 hours. This has been happening for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 492

You deserved it 309

Bored senseless

By Anonymous - 25/02/2022 06:00 - United States - Verona

Today, I realized this virus pandemic lockdown had no effect on my love life as I spent another free night cutting 1/4 inch thick calluses off my feet, as I have done before all this happened two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 179

I'm so bored

By Bored - 12/10/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I realized how bored I am with life in general, as well as how bad my ADHD has gotten, when I saw a fly eating a crumb I dropped on the floor and watched it for two minutes straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 271

Cool story

By Anonymous - 22/12/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, on our twelfth wedding anniversary, my wife fell asleep at a fine dining restaurant table within seconds of asking me about my exciting job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 103

It's the Final Countdown

By Mightytall - 11/09/2019 00:01

Today, I had a very long wait at the doctor's. The three plastic plants in the waiting area have 163 leaves each, the patient information poster on the wall has 127 words, the longest word has 19 letters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 650

You deserved it 174

Don't mention it

By Anonymous - 28/03/2022 06:00 - United States - Verona

Today, my mother went on another long rant, detailing 20 years of bad things that we all already knew about a relative. The slightest recollection in a conversation never fails to turn into unending monologues. I can't change the past, nor the subject of conversation apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 93

Love and marriage

By Anonymous - 29/10/2023 22:00

Today, literally the only thing that now motivates my husband to do anything is sex. Not food, money, humour, or anything. Once he’s had sex, he’ll do anything I ask him to for about 8 hours, then he turns back into a depressing, shiftless lump who either goes to work, sits in his chair, or sleeps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 262

You deserved it 444

The one where they all bore my **** off

By new topic please! - 11/01/2023 06:00

Today, my boyfriend doesn’t understand why I don’t care too much for his friend group. He’s pretty mid, but the rest of them are hardcore republicans. It’s not their beliefs that get me, it’s the fact that they’re completely incapable of talking about anything other than politics. I’m so bored! FML

I agree, your life sucks 974

You deserved it 341

Monotony

By Bahi - 12/03/2022 06:00

Today, after I'd bought a daily planner to write down my plans and my accomplishments for this year, we're now in March and it’s completely empty. I realized that I have no goal, no plans, nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 291

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I forgot my library book on a bench then I got on a bus, so I got off at the next stop and walked back to get it. I arrived just in time to see some guy pick it up and hop on another bus. So now I'm not on the bus I needed, and I have to pay for the book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 104

You deserved it 4 675

Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 079

You deserved it 21 528

Today, I caught my cousin's husband ogling me at a party. I decided to talk to him, but each time he'd avoid me. Eventually I confronted him about staring at me; he then pointed at the front of my dress, my nipple had slightly snuck out of my low-cut dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 1 897

Poor lad.

I agree, your life sucks 262

You deserved it 88

Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year-old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 526

You deserved it 33 802

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 672

You deserved it 3 179