Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML
Today, after paying at the gas station, the cashier stuck out her hand, which was clenched into a fist. I thought she wanted a fist-bump, so I gave her one. She just stared back at me. Turns out she was just trying to give me my change. FML
Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML
Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML
Today, while I was working the drive-thru window, a customer sneezed into his hand and then handed me his money. FML
Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML
Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer who, just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
thwei 0
Awkward
ajmacrae 5
Who the hell "puts" their hand on a high five? You gotta slap that. The way you described it made it sound like a conjugal visit at a state penitentiary. No wonder it would have been awkward.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
thwei 0
Awkward
doodfunnyguy 0
i dont get it. help
RetardedChipmunk 7
Wtf is wrong with you?
Nutty4Muffs 3
You know you're stupid when a RetardedChimpmunk makes fun of your intelligence...
RetardedChipmunk 7
Unfortunately, Retarded Chipmuncks are smarter than a pretty large group of people on this site...
mrahhhhh 21
#11, the tribal warrior from Fallout 2 said it best: "Most people have evil spirits. You? You have stupid spirits. Go see shaman, get hole in head... Big hole... Very big... Huge."
enonymous 9
I wish all checkout people would high five their customers. Makes it a lot friendlier place to shop. I mean think about it wouldn't you like someone to say. "Oh shit!! She bought some mother ******* chunky monkey. ***** going down tonight!!" (high five)
julian24245 0
That would spread a lot of germs though, like who knows where there hand has been. Or what that hand has been doing.
The_Troller 14
26- you misspelled chipmunk. It's ok though, you're still smarter than a good ~20% of the people on this site. 54- WTF how is it gross to get high five?
dre_bro11 12
61, 54 is probably one of those Sheldon type people from the Big Bang Theory in relation to germs.
jacie00 4
amen!
monkeys1315 0
I sort of agree with 54, money is gross so people handling money all day have very germy hands.
Bobissmall 13
Indeed. Very socially awkward penguin.
slopijoe 0
yeah and that's an awkward way to describe a high five too
Freeze_fml 17
Pretty tragic.
FreshSalad 1
Their life is so ****** now.
hilary56 0
Not tragic, just embarrassing. Life goes on!
HideouslyHuman 10
3000+1=3001...
danishbagel 3
82, No shit, Sherlock.
Ha1r1nY0S0up 15
82 just blew my mind..
awkwardlifeguard 9
Changed my life.
captainfalcon7 0
"thanks for coming in. high five!!"
exleonhart 0
One time I held a fist up and got fist bumped by the girl at a gas station as I was trying to give her the change for some nibs.
fatraptorjesus13 9
what are nibs? just wondering I'm a stupid American :p
fashionistaGirll 0
Small pieces of licorice
mwoods2293 0
you probably made his day way more fun!
lillylove_fml 6
that was touching moment for him
G97Alex 21
I see what you did there!
overcastlexi 0
This always happens to me. So awkward.
pie29302930 0
You are so beautiful
36591951 9
Always? You'd think they would learn from the first time lol
jgduplante 9
It happens to me sometimes too. You can't really learn from it because it's more of a reflex.. At least for me.
careless92 5
Yeahhh I'm a cashier and I do stuff like that all the time ... Smh :(
MajesticKing 0
NOOB
btnhdude 0
Filopian tubes.... Moobs... Whose Juice Moves To The Groove, Dude? Rude To Moose-Face, Testy Facial Haired Women Whom I Woo Then Pool'm Into My Noose And Soon Eat Noodles.
btnhdude 0
YES, Pendatik. Seriously. It Doesn't matter if i do write caps for every Word. Take... Me... SERIOUSLY. Especially when i randomly mention tubes.
DocBastard 40
Gabriello Fallopio is weeping in his grave right now.
btnhdude 0
How does writing in caps make me an idiot? And about the Fillopian tube thing. I really didnt know It isnt spelled that way, But not knowing doesnt make me stupid. Now, please run along and get back to feeling so very important by bagging on someone on this website.
Lidiya8lml 0
Majestic King is a ******* 4 year old who thinks that their playing Runescape what u expect from a ******* 14 year old
ajmacrae 5
Who the hell "puts" their hand on a high five? You gotta slap that. The way you described it made it sound like a conjugal visit at a state penitentiary. No wonder it would have been awkward.
nava1210 12
That awkward moment when the following customer expected a high-five..
monzach 5
Best way to make it less awkward: say "I love you."
shazza26 1
That'll make it more awkward
CapnRach 2
Then be like "LOL JK. Here's your receipt."
evilteddybear 0
...but i already have a girlfriend....