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Abuse

By Anonymous - 13/07/2020 17:01

Today, I was taking Zoom classes. We live in a one-bedroom apartment, which means I could hear my mom and dad fighting. I didn't notice that my mic wasn't muted. Everyone in my class now thinks that CPS needs to be called to my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 898

You deserved it 272

It's a doggy dog world

By FMWLife - 11/01/2023 02:00

Today, my 13 year-old daughter took our French Bulldog puppy out to pee. She left him out there and went back inside the house. She didn’t know she had to let him back in and thought he would bark at the door when he was done. It’s been two hours and he’s nowhere to be found. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 330

Mortified

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, my vibrator rolled out of my bag so far down the table that I couldn’t catch it, and had to run round the table to grab it by leaning between two of my male coworkers. That vibrator lives under my bed, so the only way it could've got in my work bag would be my boyfriend pranking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 192

Wise words of wisdom to consider

By Anonymous - 01/12/2025 00:00

Today, I realized that in some of my early relationships the girls were so possessive and pushed for merger and marriage that they scared me, so now I can only be reliably attracted to women who don't want me. The slightest sign of interest in more than a fling and I'm out. It's been like this for 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 411

Sneaky

By Wow - 15/01/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, my cat tried to steal my burger. She was successful. She grabbed the patty with her teeth and pulled it right out of the burger. I was too dumbfounded to try and stop her. I have a suspicion that she is hungry and I forgot to feed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 071

My window

By Anonymous - 20/05/2024 13:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my new neighbour is delusional. She’s only lived next door 3 weeks and she’s called the police on me 11 times for “taking his bin out so he can look in my window”, “hanging out the washing so he can look in my window” and “barbecuing with his kids so he can look in my window.” Crazy bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 67

Like a bat

By Blind - 15/01/2023 21:00 - United States

Today, my glasses have completely disappeared. I know for a fact that I put them on my desk, but now they're absolutely nowhere to be found. This is my first time playing "Find your glasses without the assistance of your glasses" and I'm failing at it badly. My vision isn't even that bad yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 715

You deserved it 130

Get back here!

By brad - 03/06/2024 21:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, the slow, incompetent kitchen staff was keeping customers waiting for their food for 20 minutes. I got sick of a bunch of grown adults with kids my age ganging up on me, so I quit on the spot, and walked. Some guy grabbed me by the collar and dragged me back to the register. People cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 156

The walls have ears

By Anonymous - 20/01/2023 12:00

Today, while I was at the doctor's looking nasty and sick, I ran into my ex. He was my first boyfriend and he cheated on me the whole time, and then left me. I went into a room with my friend while we were waiting and told her EVERYTHING about him. Turns out everyone heard me, INCLUDING HIM. Now I have to see him tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 324

You deserved it 930

Didn't see ya there

By AylaMarie92 - 09/11/2021 13:59

Today, like every other day, I suffer from insomnia. On returning to the bedroom after a very late night shower to hopefully get some rest, I sat on my cat. I jumped up quickly and smacked my face against the cupboard. I then looked back to see if she was OK. I'd sat on my Squishmallow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 344

Chase me!

By Anonymous - 29/01/2023 00:30

Today, my son decided to run around a supermarket in his underwear, leaving me to chase after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 266

Zoom call from hell

By low_expectations - 19/08/2020 02:04

Today, I was yelled at by my mom for not communicating to the rest of my family about the zoom call SHE planned and asked for. The call was to celebrate my birthday. Apparently, it was my responsibility to coordinate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 531

You deserved it 113

What's going on?

By Anonymous - 01/02/2023 22:00

Today, I went to a political debate, and now I'm more confused than when I arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 559

You deserved it 261

Exterminator

By being cheap is expensive! - 25/11/2021 05:01

Today, my wife’s unending cheapness and need for a “deal” has bitten us in the ass. Literally. She accepted a bag of clothes from a coworker and yup, you guessed it, it was infested with fucking bedbugs. Now our whole house has them, and all she said was, “At least the clothes can be washed.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 219

You deserved it 145

Technical issue

By yeahright343 - 14/11/2021 14:01

Today, I received a toll bill via email. The photograph showed a white pickup truck. I drive a blue Honda Element. At lease the license plates have the same letters on them… but in a different order. Apparently the software that matches plates is dyslexic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 90

Mr Whiskers takes priority

By Anonymous - 07/12/2021 16:58

Today, my daughter forgot my birthday. When I asked her, she said she'd remembered my birthday, but was too busy at work to acknowledge it. However, she did have time to post a message on Facebook, wishing a happy birthday to her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 134

Niles Crane wannabe

By that’s crazy - 12/02/2023 17:00 - United States

Today, I felt comfortable enough to invite the guy I’ve been seeing over to my apartment for the first time. Things immediately got weird when he started to inspect my place top to bottom to make sure it was “clean to his standards”. I told him to leave when he started going in my closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 117

Red tape

By Stupid bureaucracy - 15/02/2023 12:00

Today, I received the contract for the new job I'm supposed to start in two weeks. It says I need an official document from the public health department, which I have to present on the first day on the job. The first available appointment to get said document is in four weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 114

Hurry Up!

By FML Videos - 07/10/2018 18:00 - United States - New York

shit shit shit shit shit

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 85

By Boulette - 23/06/2014 05:44 - France - Dammartin-en-go?le

Today, I was on vacation, when a very cute guy starting talking to me and asked me what my name was. Overwhelmed and stressed out, I blurted out that I didn't have one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 956

You deserved it 12 678

Is it just me or…?

By Anonymous - 15/07/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom - Hornsey

Today, after I ghosted a good friend for 6 months due to mental health issues/dropping out/other life changes, it's been a week since I got back in contact, and I think she hates me now. I stalk her on social media sometimes on my laptop and she made a playlist called "What the F*** are you doing?" like 3 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 748

Was it "Girl Afraid" by The Smiths?

By what - 21/07/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I was listening to some music with my wife, and I mentioned that the song that was playing changed my mind about breaking up after an argument from years ago. For some reason, she got insanely pissed, threw a suitcase at me, and told me to pack and go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 191

You deserved it 576

When you're accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression

By Anonymous - 04/01/2022 08:01

Today, again, I listened to dozens of people continue to whine about how pandemic restrictions are the hardest thing ever while continuing to battle the chronic illnesses, loss of family, underemployment, trauma, and ensuing depression I've struggled with, largely in secret, for the last 15+ years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 997

You deserved it 316

Bullies never grow out of it

By Daveryan - 28/07/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom - Salisbury

Today, I had a fight with my sister. Back when I was a chubby teen, I was made to wear a woman's panty girdle and hated it. She used to taunt me with slogans like, "Is your girdle killing you?", "Can you believe it's a girdle?" etc. Today she yelled, "Don't bust your girdle!" It's been years and the bitch still won't let up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 105

By NotAParabola - 07/10/2009 04:39 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend over webcam with a cute negligee. He was doing homework. Half an hour later, he finally noticed. Apparently pre-calc is more interesting than his girlfriend. I guess polynomials are just curvier than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 279

You deserved it 39 269

Golden child

By Ana - 30/07/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, my mom proved to me that there was favoritism between me and my siblings. My mom made me use my money to buy everyone dinner, but when my brother wanted to buy himself food, my mom asked him if he was gonna buy me and our sister some too, he said, "No, I don’t want to" and she said, "That’s fine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 108

Heavy sleeper

By unlucky - 27/09/2020 10:49

Today, I had a migraine. I decided to wear earplugs to block out sound while I slept. I don't usually wear them because they hurt my ears like nobody's business. The one day I wear earplugs, I get robbed. In the middle of the day. Through my own bedroom window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 427

You deserved it 143

Beginner

By madzlovesgee - 16/05/2009 17:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 906

You deserved it 53 410

Flustration

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 18:00

Today, I got flustered by the gorgeous sandwich artist at Subway and ordered a “meat-long foot-ball.” On Rye of course. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 265

No Way Home

By HeartbrokenAsFffff - 12/01/2022 07:59

Today, I found out that my husband wasn’t at “work” like he said he was. He'd told me he couldn’t come to my Master degree graduation because he was called into “work” last minute. I guess “work” is code word for the “movie theatre” watching Spider-Man with an unidentified female person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 502

You deserved it 146

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my parents said they were cutting me off for saving a kitten's life and wanting to keep it. I am 40 years-old and don't get any money from them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 66

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 154

Today, I came home to tell my parents about my new nose job I got about a month ago. My mom always told me I should get one, so I didn't tell her right away to see if she would notice. I was home for about 20 minutes before she asked me, "So when are you getting that nose job?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 024

You deserved it 6 865

Today, I was looking after my 9 year-old nephew when I let him play some web games on my MacBook. A few hours later, I found out I'd underestimated his tech skills, as he'd changed all my contacts to "Mr. Spongebob Squarepants." Thanks to iCloud, all contacts on all my devices were changed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 545

Today, after three years of being in physical pain, which affects my health and daily life, I was told it's an undiagnosable condition that I'll have to deal with for a long time, as there are no answers and no fixable solution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 105

Today, I logged onto facebook to realize that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 741

You deserved it 3 563