The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

10 out 10 for execution

By Anonymous - 30/08/2020 05:01 - Australia - Liverpool

Today, I had to squat to retrieve something from the bottom of the cabinet in the bathroom. This caused me to fart and startle myself enough that I jumped and banged my forehead on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 271

You deserved it 619

You do it

By Anonymous - 23/01/2026 09:00

Today, I’m a supervisor who swore 50-hour weeks were “the minimum.” My team preferred having lives, I missed my quota, and my $10,000 bonus vanished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 1 355

Brain worms

By David Ryan - 11/09/2020 10:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking by a neighbour when he said, "Is your dad home?" I swiftly replied, "I'm good thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 384

Badum tish

By Too Bad So Sad - 16/02/2023 12:00 - Canada - London

Today, I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder (S.A.D.). I already have seasonal affective disorder (S.A.D.) and depression. That’s a lot of SADness for one person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 166

By [...] - 12/12/2013 14:28 - France - Vaulx-en-velin

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 046

You deserved it 8 267

By dormeur - 18/01/2013 11:39 - France - Malakoff

Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a paw slap, then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 745

You deserved it 15 863

Masters of mischief

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 16:00 - United States - Salem

Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 157

Hey Jude, don't make it bad

By faul - 26/09/2020 05:02 - United States

Today, a lady told me I looked like Paul McCartney in his youth. With that little confidence boost, I told my girlfriend. I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that she didn't know who Paul McCartney is, or how she is now obsessively Googling pictures of him and is practically drooling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 219

Ross?

By Anonymous - 04/10/2020 08:02 - United States - Klawock

Today, my wife had a dream that I was in the bath with our newborn baby. In the dream, I threw the baby out like a football. She can't get the image out of her head and won't forgive me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 290

You deserved it 98

Lazy day

By Fail - 17/03/2023 22:00 - United States

Today, I got an exercise wheel for my cat. He took a nap on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 603

You deserved it 318

Troublemaker

By Anonymous - 11/01/2022 05:01

Today, a new hire at my workplace, who is already on probation, yelled at me about filing an HR complaint about him. I had customers, who definitely heard. I've never filed a complaint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 312

You deserved it 99

Nice try

By Patricia89 - 22/01/2022 22:59

Today, I came home early from work and caught my husband cheating red-handed, in bed with the other woman. His reaction was, “I was just joking!” and asked the other woman what she was doing here, and asked her to leave. Seriously? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 802

You deserved it 153

False economy

By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 16:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I tried to save money by buying a generic brand of coffee instead of my usual brand. It tasted terrible and I ended up throwing it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 548

You deserved it 347

Stahp!

By Michael - 15/10/2020 05:02 - United States - Kearny

Today, I had to babysit my dying grandmother, so I brought up my guitar. She hadn't said anything to anyone today, and the first thing and only thing she said was, "Stop. Make it stop" to me when I played. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 036

You deserved it 414

Between a rock and a hard place

By Anonymous - 12/01/2022 22:59

Today, my mom wanted to kick me out of the house, but she has a brain tumor and can’t be left alone. I want to leave this place, but I can’t leave her. I’m ready to quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 118

Bit nippy out

By Anonymous - 24/01/2022 07:59 - Germany - Ebersbach

Today, my mom wants to save money on both heating and electricity. Put into practice, this means that the temperature in my room is about the same as that in our fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 048

You deserved it 96

Wasted Robots

By FML Videos - 17/11/2018 00:30

Embarrassingly accurate. Cheers!

I agree, your life sucks 231

You deserved it 64

Confusing guys and their bro code

By Men are weird - 23/08/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my son tried to fight my husband, his step-dad, who knocked him to the floor with one good punch. I was ready to throw my husband out, but an hour later they were having a heart-to-heart, and now they get along better than they ever have. HUH?!! FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 193

Oi bruv, you 'avin' a laugh?

By Anonymous - 28/01/2022 07:59 - United Kingdom

Today, as the shop is right round the corner, and I couldn’t be arsed changing, I kept my boob tube on under my jacket. Of course, at the shop, I slipped on spilled water and as I went down the tube came down as well, and I ended up lying there with my tits out for a group of teenagers to laugh at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 524

Ghosts!

By Binks - 26/10/2020 17:01 - United States - Charleston

Today I woke up feeling good and ready for my online business class final, only to find that it had somehow been submitted and graded with a zero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 115

You deserved it 145

Too realistic

By ThatLove - 05/04/2023 18:00 - Switzerland - Worb

Today, I had to explain to my housemate that the cast of "The Crown" is not the real Royal Family impersonating themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 753

You deserved it 113

It's not THAT hard

By Anonymous - 14/11/2020 05:07

Today, I found out how hard it is to actually change light bulbs. I work with electricians. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 314

Cute trick

By Anonymous - 21/09/2024 06:00 - United States - Sierra Vista

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. As the cop approached my car, my cat appeared out of nowhere, seemingly jumping out of behind the passenger seat, ran up my arm, and sat on my shoulder with his eyes like satellite dishes. The officer was too busy laughing to give me a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 169

Big yikes

By Anonymous - 22/04/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I slapped my boyfriend’s ass as he was getting out of the shower and came away with shit on my finger. Bear in mind this was AFTER he'd showered, when he’s supposed to be all clean, yet he had enough shit there to get on my finger from patting his cheeks. Not his crack, his cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 601

You deserved it 101

Nope, not adding up

By Anonymous - 30/04/2023 10:00 - Canada - LaSalle

Today, I learned that my girlfriend prefered being fully under the blanket during our first time to avoid being cold and to save electricity. This would've been completely fine by me if she didn't have IBS. Done the math yet? FML

I agree, your life sucks 658

You deserved it 176

Do as you're told

By Fuck u - 30/04/2026 00:00 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, my parents forced me to do chores. I worked extra slow to rebel against their tyranny. My dad then said I'm not allowed to get my learner's permit for another six months and took away my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 1 100

The value of labor

By Chad - 28/09/2024 20:00 - Belgium

Today, after working for over a decade at the same place, I was formally written up with two days of leave without pay for refusing to work extra overtime. I've been working over 80 hours a week for four months now and even cancelled some very important plans so I could work every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 548

You deserved it 92

Modern warfare

By Anonymous - 19/02/2022 01:59

Today, I get the feeling my wife is mad at me. I have no evidence to support this, except she ran me a bath with a bath bomb and a shit load of chilli powder, so like I say, no hard evidence except the excruciating burning in my asshole, peehole, ballsack, nostril and eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 209

Beauty standards

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 570

Same

By Anonymous - 04/10/2024 16:00 - Germany - Buchholz in der Nordheide

Today, people’s spelling has gotten so bad that I do a double take whenever I see “its” used in the place it’s actually supposed to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 282

You deserved it 132

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Marriage My ex Family Love Weddings Grandparents Miscellaneous Relatable Birthday Cute Kids Embarrassing Music Neighbours Housework Awkward Annoying Exhausted Transportation Airport Sports Birds Proposal Fight Parents Racism Healthy Lifestyle Social Media Horses Animals

The Top

Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 393

You deserved it 7 210

Today, I found out my little brother is a highly committed Nazi. He goes to meetings and everything, my parents think it's great he is "getting out and developing a social life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 451

You deserved it 2 164

Today, I went to the doctor for a physical. I've been sitting in the doctor's bathroom for 10 minutes now, trying to think of how to tell him I accidentally tripped and spilled my urine sample on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 101

You deserved it 4 872

Today, I learned that if you stare down an attractive man while pumping gas, he'll stare back. Then he might ask for your number. At which point his girlfriend will get out of the car and threaten to kick your ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 577

You deserved it 12 624

Today, my wife and I were watching TV. The lady on the show began to talk about how to have a smooth divorce. My wife discreetly turned the volume up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 870

You deserved it 4 525

Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 629

You deserved it 51 675