Today, I was trying to walk in heels. My mom then started cracking up, saying I looked like a baby giraffe learning to walk just after coming out of the womb. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I sprained my ankle trying to prove that I can walk in high heels. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store in my brand new high heels. I tried to be graceful as I walked down the aisle but ended up slipping on some spilled juice and doing a weird half-dance, half-flailing thing. The shoppers around me turned to watch as I clumsily tried to regain my balance. As if that wasn’t bad enough, I also knocked over a display of discounted snacks. FML
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
Today, I went out wearing the highest heels I had, but was nervous about falling because I'm such a klutz. I got through the night without any injuries, so I changed into the sneakers I had brought with me to walk home. I tripped right outside my house in my sneakers and broke my ankle. FML
Today, I was on a video call with my boss and some clients. Everything was going smoothly until my 3-year-old son walked in wearing my wife’s high heels and started running circles around me, yelling, “Look at me, I’m a queen!” My boss and clients were visibly confused, and all I could do was laugh nervously, and hope it'll never be mentioned again. FML
Today, I wore a new pair of heels to an interview. Halfway through, as they were showing me around the production floor, one of my heels snapped. I was forced to finish the interview wobbling on one heel like a drunk flamingo. I wasn’t offered the job, but they did say, “You have great balance.” FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and told me I looked like a foot. Thanks a bunch, darling. FML
Today, I realized that while I've been the same minuscule height for the past five years, my feet won't stop growing. I'm 5 foot and a size 12. I look like a clown. FML
Today, I laughed at my friend for tripping on the sidewalk. While imitating him to show “how stupid" he looked, I stepped on the exact same sidewalk, twisted my ankle, and fell over in front of a bunch of strangers. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
It’s a skill, with practice you will get better. Years ago I was in Japan on business. At a train station I saw a young woman running to catch her train wearing very tall shoes. It was like watching a gazelle run. She seemed to spend as much time in the air as on her feet. I was impressed. You walk before you run…
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Um…that’s pretty much how it works.
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Comments (4)
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Um…that’s pretty much how it works.
Chazzster 32
It’s a skill, with practice you will get better. Years ago I was in Japan on business. At a train station I saw a young woman running to catch her train wearing very tall shoes. It was like watching a gazelle run. She seemed to spend as much time in the air as on her feet. I was impressed. You walk before you run…
xxlk4xx 6
I'll be the first to admit that while wearing heals I look like a baby giraffe learning how to walk lol..