Today, I found out the girl I've been fooling around with for two weeks has a boyfriend, who is in jail, and is a member of the Aryan Brotherhood. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my girlfriend of four years is legally married to a man in prison. He gets out next week. FML
Today, I found out the girl my boyfriend was seeing just before me is pregnant. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been seeing another girl behind my back. The kicker is that he told her I was his lazy sister and had just moved in. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me. I got ahold of the girl he was cheating on me with. She was as oblivious as I was of each other's existence. Apparently, the fucker told her he lived with his "sister," who's "a bitch and makes his life impossible." He was referring to me. FML
Today, I found out that the girl that my boyfriend considers “one of the guys” isn’t really one of the guys after all. I trusted him to let her stay at his house overnight on several occasions, and to spend alone time with her. She’s pregnant, and the baby is his. FML
Today, I realized that I have completely fallen for this incredible guy, and that I'm really looking forward to where our relationship will take us. He just informed me that he will be doing jail time following his court date on Tuesday. FML
Today, I figured out my boyfriend gets out of jail in less than six months. First off, I have a boyfriend in jail. Second, I also realized I'd much prefer he stay in than get out. FML
Today, I found out that the "burglar" I caught, punched, and tied up for the cops was actually my wife's secret lover. FML
Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML
Today, I found out that my current girlfriend has dated all of my friends at one time or another. FML
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Top comments
stephissilly 18
sunglasses. name change. mexico.
RedPillSucks 33
I hope you're not black, or jewish, or a black jew.
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Comments (76)
Aboss786110 0
Gl bro
Joecam 0
Hide!
Castiell_fml 0
What's the Aryan Brothers?
GoW_Chick 15
Google is a search engine for a reason, try it.
YtotsDI 0
*hands you an envelope* in here is your fake id Fake money ($1000,000) Fake bus pass and fake gum Go down to the train station down town and meet my cousin lary (he has a green hat and red hair with a big sign on his back saying "HI IM LARRY. DONT F*CK ME!") he will take you away in a truck. He will take you to canada where you can take a plane to Hawaii where you can take a boat to china. Once you get there you will realize you forgot your envelope and take a boat back to Hawaii take the plane back to canada, drive back home and grab your envelope and do it all again. Once you get to china, talk to my friend Ying. He will get you started on your new life.
dirtroadboy 7
Good luck. Be glad you haven't been caught up yet. Now would be a great time to disappear.
Mitcha857 0
First off he's in jail so he really can't get to you. Secondly, do you really think she would fool around if he could somehow find out? How would he anyways? Quit being a pussy! Stop being afraid of someone who can't touch you
Castiell_fml 0
What's a Google?
cntryiscntrywide 0
25- why did I read all of that? Lol
Mitcha857 0
Wow all the people who thumb down are afraid of someone who can't touch them..pathetic
stephissilly 18
sunglasses. name change. mexico.
CoolRainbowdash 15
How about china?
stephissilly 18
china could work!
SmittyJA24 26
No, ... not Mexico. They (white supremists) don't like Mexicans.... & weapons are readily available there. I suggest Canada.
lrgenesis 19
19- Canada works because they've got the best maple syrup, iglooes, eskimoes, lumberjacks, and accents, eh?
Meowingtons500 18
I'm Canadian. I've never seen a polar bear or igloo up close but I do know we have ketchup chips, kinder surprises, free healthcare, better bacon, way less aryan brothers (if any,) and me!
TheDrifter 24
We still have the Aryan Brotherhood here, but real maple syrup makes up for any potential risk. What I wonder though, if she's attracted to that kind of guy, what sort of jerk did op come across as?
GoW_Chick 15
Whoa hold up you do not have better bacon, your bacon is a lie, just because you call it canadian bacon doesn't make it so. :P
TheDrifter 24
Blasphemy! Canadian back bacon is better than American streaky bacon any day.
Meowingtons500 18
Haha, well I'm sorry, I've tried bacon in the states, and bacon in Canada and I prefer ours by alot. I'm not gonna lie, I'm very jealous that you guys have vanilla and cherry coke, and better kfc. :)
drooller 9
How about to new Zealand.. Or to Papua new guinea... They won't find him there cause they probably don't know where it is
GoW_Chick 15
I'm jealous that you get to call your police force Mounties, but you really don't have vanilla coke over there, that is terrible, I shall send you some friend. :)
crymore007 11
Still counts!
killtin 2
I believe you meant to say Doesn't matter had sex
lhfireman 0
well, glad this could be your final words. nice knowing ya
TheRealBrianGrif 7
Ya this is when you cut ties and run!
eastsidesoldier 7
That ain't scary hes in jail ur perfectly safe:)
docscientist 10
He probably has Aryan members he knows on the outside... And he might be having his friends keep tabs on her.
boofgall 16
People have escaped from jail before too..
KingOfAmazing 9
At least there's always something to talk about.
fjretsel 1
So????
RedPillSucks 33
I hope you're not black, or jewish, or a black jew.
brianjman14 23
Or mexican.
stevenJB 25
Anything without a shade of white or pink(some ppl look pink).