Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my girlfriend's house to play Twister. Her parents watched us the whole time, making sure we didn't touch. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, after waiting for two weeks for the right moment to meet my boyfriend's mom, she walked in as I was straddling him, trying to prove that I'd win in a wrestling match. I guess we met, then. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have fun at school. So, we went into the locker room. We were making out for a couple minutes when the door opened. It was the principal, who also happens to be her dad. FML
Today, I was playing what became an extremely intense game of hide-and-seek with my best friend's sister. I finally found the perfect place, so I slid down into the bath and began to cover myself. She popped up out of nowhere and said, "FOUND YOU!" I got so scared that I punched her in the face. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML
Today, I was playing Charades with my boyfriend's family. When it was his turn, he pointed at me. His mother said "Bitch?" The answer was "relationship". FML
Today, I playfully nudged my friend on the shoulder. She countered by shoving me head-first into a trash can. FML
Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
deviable 9
What a twist!
MrKlutch 1
Ask her mom to join you guys
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Comments (83)
MrKlutch 1
Ask her mom to join you guys
iBanana 17
Not every situation can be magically transformed into a porno
Epic_Fail911 15
Squeeze her butt too.. maybe she was just jealous.
xlord 27
Dw worry guys OP said it was only Jokingly so it really wasn't a problem.
n_epic_fail 14
7- no but we sure can try. Anything can happen in Texas
white16sox 19
12 don't worry worry?
ohSNAPyall 27
This joke is played out, FMLers.
thrAsHeRr9081 16
7 - Rule #34. Enough said.
SamBaBam98 0
Wait which school carnival cuz I was at one In my town in Texas and I played twister
lemon_phat 11
You play twister at school carnivals? I'm jealous..
likasumboooodi 0
mom was already playing with them
fackincrazy 0
LIES !!!!
Humanspider 18
Does not mean a guy can not dream for that one magical porno day
sreejithgmenon 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That was cool but control man....!!!
hamncheeseinit 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Just say were comfortable with each other and admit to cheating!!!
memily63 12
Is that even English..?
TheDrummingResul 0
Cheating had absolutely nothing to do with that FML and you butchered that sentence so bad...
infinity99_fml 3
Was it a soft butt ?
deviable 9
What a twist!
teague95 16
Was it the right hand red it always gets me twisted.
HomeAl0ne 20
I prefer the Adult Twister where you add pink and brown to the spinner, and play it oiled up and naked.
Telescope 1
I'm sure it was fun trying to explain that.
alicianoar 7
That's not an fml. Are you ******* twelve?
best_username 3
haha goodsawt
yadisingh 5
Goodsawt? The **** is that?
bearnblue 0
#40 u made me laugh :P
bearnblue 0
#40 u made me laugh :P
cmayo 3
At least it wasn't naked twister.
Mister_Triangle 21
Everybody wins in naked twister. Well, except me. I have no friends so I can only play naked twister alone with my antique pool noodle collection.
ohSNAPyall 27
If only your snail weren't such a party pooper.
sydnee14 7
I've never even heard of naked twister!!
False_Stupidity 42
^ oh boy, your missing epic fun then.
Garytt 0
"She had a spider on her butt"
comment11111 39
haha, funny :)