Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards, he said he was in love with me and that he wants to be with me forever. It was also at this time I realised that I can't stand him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend always has sex with me like he hates me. Turns out, he actually hates me. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in two years. With a man I love, who is handsome, very nicely equipped, and quite good at it. I was in pain the entire time. It took me 3 tries to realize there is something physically wrong with me, and once I get it fixed, he'll be gone. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML
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Top comments
summerbreeze888 10
You realize this AFTER you guys had sex? Haha woww..
CaptainCola 7
Ah young love
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Comments (93)
CaptainCola 7
Ah young love
dirtroadboy 7
think before you act
xSonic 9
Hump and dump
enonymous 9
Wow... These "Should have had a v8" commercials are getting racier and racier
BarDownDaily 12
Doesn't matter, had sex.
kyarush 10
Cut it off before it gets worse. Don't lead the poor guy on, if it's not meant to be then tell him.
GovernorGeneral 8
Its not as easy as you make it sound^
kyarush 10
If I can do it, anyone can. You just have to find the thing in your back that holds everything together... I think it's called a spine?
zakkyzebra 11
55, when I hear "cut it off" after talking about sex on an FML. I get scared...
JMTS 0
True love... O wait.
summerbreeze888 10
You realize this AFTER you guys had sex? Haha woww..
007bawss 0
Realizations always come up AFTER sex ;P
Amrel 10
Like realising they suck dick at ******* pussy?
Pentium_4 27
let me guess, been goin out 2 weeks?
boundlesssmiles 2
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
This is exactly why you wait until marriage.
Jovecove 13
Lol wouldn't waiting for marriage makes it worse if she couldn't stand him, but it's too late cause they're married.
AdmiralPedoBear 1
You're a bitch
CuteDumBlonde64 11
Reminds me of my frist time.
boofgall 16
Frist eh? Sometimes auto correct comes in handy.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Oh, whew, good thing it wasn't your FIRST time, cause that sure would have sucked.
GovernorGeneral 8
Tsk. Why are you eating him out. He only made a typo. Happens to everyone. Shit. You guys need to calm your balls. =.=
iliketofu 6
Reminds you of your FIST times, u mean?
007bawss 0
It couldn't have been THAT bad… sex&ditch somehow always go together o.O
kyarush 10
My frist time... Ah... I was 11 and she was a 36 year old woman... She seduced me with a French love song.
im_the_smoshiest 0
O_O
asherm 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Slight borderline personality?
TheNewGuy03 29
So he's teetering precariously on the line between having a personality and not having one? My, things have changed... |the kid|
Ethandangerfield 6
No, I think he means Borderline Personality Disorder.
yahoowizard 16
If it was the guy that said that, only explanation is that he's a douchebag, but when the girl does it it's a psychological disorder. Ofc
jaredjudd21 2
Was it the sex?
cmyk 19
Sounds like an episode of The Big Bang Theory. The to early "I love you".
Marom 3
Too bad for him.. If you can't stand someone, don't be with them. BUT break up with respect, because you will hurt him
kickuwithmyfist 1
For-ev-er! For-ev-er! For-ev-er!
party_rockin 4
Totally read that in squints voice from the sandlot
zombicidal 11
I totally pictured the sponge Bob episode
WLCD123 0
Squidward: "Me and Spongebob working together, forever?!?!"
BeaterOfTheDrums 15
Don't sleep with someone if you can't stand them. That's implying to him you were only interested in his dick.
marscm55 11
I don't see how you were thumbed down. I agree with you
afunnyterdcody 5
Ha ain't bitching wrong with that
kyarush 10
What's wrong with just wanting sex? Lol
khatyangelz 0
Thats what prostitues are for. :o
TheDrifter 24
Who needs prostitutes when it seems every teen girl will do it either for free or for dinner and a couple drinks?
HollowSanctuary 7
Run!!!