Today, my boyfriend and I were roleplaying therapist and patient in bed. When I playfully asked him what bothered him, he told me his mother hates him and burst into tears. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to break down and cry because his mother hates me for unknown reasons. I walked in, gave him a long hug, and started sobbing. I then saw his mother. She was visiting him to complain about how terrible a person I am. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend, who’s a massage therapist, if he could help my mom with her chronic migraines by massaging her head and neck. My dad came home, saw them in the dimly lit room and knocked my boyfriend out cold for "touching his woman." My boyfriend dumped me and wants my dad arrested. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
blinked_281 29
I see this as actually a good thing. He's obviously been holding this in. And guys tend to have a hard time talking about tough subjects. Of course, it ruined the mood, but there's always next time :)
mareehn 6
dude :(
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (95)
failingdaily 11
Therapist or The rapist? ;)
peacheso 31
Why?
ClassyCataclasis 4
No...
IKickPuppiesHard 16
Oh wow. I read the OP as "the rapist" and wondered why no one mentioned that but this post just made me realize I shouldnt be on FML right after waking up....
Zm90 5
love him :d
gracehi 33
Next time go with dirty teacher and naughty school girl.
whenitdidhappen 14
or the ice cream girl..you can never go wrong with the ice cream girl ;)
Wakachulak 22
26, can you explain how that one works? I've definitely never heard of it, and I've heard plenty.
Just_A_Tree 20
I could see the bad teacher and dirty school girl going wrong as well. Boyfriend as teacher, OP as student. Boyfriend: "So... I see you've been struggling in math. Maybe you'll have to stay after class so I can teach you a few 'tricks'." Girlfriend: "I'll do anything that you'd think would help." Boyfriend: "Good, so what time are you expected to get home? I wouldn't want to hold you after class for too long." Girlfriend: "My mom wants me home by 5:00." Boyfriend: "I wish my mom wanted me..." *begins crying*
whenitdidhappen 14
@26.bf: can i get some ice cream? gf: oh sorry we sold out! but hey..i have ****.
JayVicious 20
I'd say naughty college student n the bad professor.... they could then use mixer at delta chi as a reference!
Ravike 17
Hope you did something special to cheer him up ;)
doctorhook86 25
Maybe still better than role-playing as a psychoanalyst/therapist: a "psycho-analrapist". (It's an Arrested Development reference.)
wang33334 12
Perhaps,that's the way he was asking for a job. You know....a brilliant job. People often say it a BJ.
mchmelev1993 10
FAIL
vikky538 29
I am sorry for him...and also sorry for you that it ruined the mood...
Ianamis 6
He clearly loves you OP. Guys tend to push down all these feelings and they come out in a big wave of emotion. Talk to him and help him as much as you can.
mosquito19 14
roleplaying is a great idea because being yourself is just boring and pathetic.